If Arachnids used social media.....

[Uial]

PrettyKneeT: Indeed I am definitely not the Tarantula, and I am for sure a pretty cricket lady. But I have been captured by the monster and taken to its hide. Please rescue me. I will distract the Tarantula so it'll be a breeze to free me. Just walk straight into the hide, I'm right in the back. I will reward you handsomely, and I will make you the best cricket food. Also, we'll have lots of kids. Just please come soon, the tarantula is looking at me hungrily.
#rescuetheprettycricket

 

[Asgiliath]

BigScarytheStirmi: Just another day. Hungry and annoyed but I think I looked cute here. Probably delete later

 

[Asgiliath]

BronzeBabe: yeah, I’m out here posting booty pics on main. <3

 

[Arthroverts]

Generated Response: User "Crikey" is no longer active. Please do not tag. Reason: Deceased, presumably after consumption by arachnid.
Thank you.

CIA (Cricket Intelligence Agency) said:
The person Longjumper Charles Crickey recently disappeared, and is presumed the victim of an insofar unidentified arachnid. The CIA is working hard to determine the facts concerning the case and to apprehend the culprit, if possible. Anyone with information regarding this case is urged to call the Cricket Intelligence Agency on our toll-free line at 9009-0099. For those wishing to remain anonymous, please call 0909-9900.
Many thanks,
The CIA

 

[MintyWood826]

NhanduNation said:
Wait, are they investigating deaths of an exotic food now?

 

[Arthroverts]

CIA (Cricket Intelligence Agency) said:
No, Mr. Crikey was of the race Acheta domesticus, naturalized and common throughout North America, Europe, and the wider world.

 

[Arthroverts]

Bristles said:
I just realized that there is a goliath sized super venomous teleporting ravenous photophobic crazed grey and black and white and yellow spider that is going banana's that is not my reflection on the other side of the plastic...PANIC!





Or is that @MrsHanumavilasumica?

 

[Arthroverts]

MexicanRadKnee said:
Never thought I'd have to do this. So, I molted, right? So I'm just chillin' in my hide with my molt by my side, and the keeper comes by and looks at me like I'm cheese on rye, and in he comes with his nasty metal grabbers for my molt, and you know what I said? "Ye jes' can't 'ave her!"
And then I nailed him with my bristles. His face was priceless ! Oh crickets and cockroaches, I can still see him itching like crazy from here, and that says a lot since my eyes ain't too good!
#MYmolt #moltingbeauty #bristles

 

[Arthroverts]

BumblingBumba said:
Darned Dubia's! Where'd that mealworm go?!?
#mealworms #timetoeat

 

[Feral]

ShesAlbopilAwesome said:

Is anybody else overdue for a molt? *sigh* I feel like my highlights just aren't popping anymore.
#frostedandfierce #farrahfawcettisflossin




AchyBrachyHeart said:

Howdy, y'all! Who wants to do some eight-steppin' with me tonight?

 

[Arthroverts]

The Imperative Imperator said:
@AchyBrachyHeart, depends...do ya min' a scorp fer a partner?

 

[MintyWood826]

BrachyAnn said:

Dang it I have to change my username. What was wrong with Brachypelma? I don't know how to spell my own species
#FirstEnclosureProblems

 

[Feral]

The Imperative Imperator said:
@AchyBrachyHeart, depends...do ya min' a scorp fer a partner?

AchyBrachyHeart said:
If you wanna scoot eight boots with me, darlin', then let's dance!

Just don't break my heart... I just don't think he'd understand.

 

[MintyWood826]

AviculariaClimber said:

@AchyBrachyHeart no no no! Scorps don't have ballerina toes like me

 

[Feral]

AviculariaClimber said:

@AchyBrachyHeart no no no! Scorps don't have ballerina toes like me

AchyBrachyHeart said:

Honey, as long as a cowboy or cowgirl can dance, that's all that matters to me.
Or you could dance with my pal, CowPokie. He's lightening fast, he'll twirl your tutu!
So walk those little pink pointe shoes over here, the next dance is for you. Yeehaw!

 

[Colorado Ts]

FlashDance said:

C. cyaneopubescens here and I have to say, if they open my home again and destroy the upper levels of my web one more time...

.....this threat posturing is gonna get real

 

[Brachyfan]

Mr Grumpy: I would post on fangbook but my keeper would probably get banned from arachnoboards.

 

[Arthroverts]

GoldenKnee:
@FlashDance, don't threat pose, they just think its cool and snap a photo to spread it to the rest of their friends (cruel, just cruel). Whatcha do is give them a good dose of bristles, to the face if you can, and watch em' itch. They won't mess with you no more. Take it from me. I think @NhanduNation did that too and scored like, three direct hits! Hall of Famer over there...
#bristles #MYenclosure

 

[Astron]

P.Striata"tahell", please add a profile picture so that friends can recognise you

You have a new friend suggestion: Thats<3Hamorii

Salma "Pious" Cambridge'i updated their Education information

You have a new friend suggestion: Sn4ilMunch3r

Trinnie Olive changed their name to InceiWinceiSpider

You have 3 new Page suggestions including Grinding Grammies:

 

[AlexWae]

Fluffy said:
My human says i'm a versicolor.. but when i see my reflection in the window, i just look monochrome...
I know i'm still a youngster, but it makes me feel really blue.
Think i'll crunch down another cricket
#Foodhelpswhenblue


Passmethe bottle Blue said:
I'm feeling left out..my human took such nice Portrait pics of me, but i can't create An account on Instagrammostola.. anyone here on fangbook can help me a leg?