# For Guys, question about girls and your hobby



## TGod (Dec 15, 2011)

Just wondering have any of you been lucky enough to find a girl who doesn't mind the fact that you share your house with enormous spiders. In my experience most girls don't even want to enter my mine cause of one pet. It generally annoyes me, "there in a friggin tank, they have NEVER escaped, it's not like I let them roam free lol. Anyway if I found a girl that would actually go as far as buying me a T or even hold one, I think I would marry her on the spot lol.


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## Crysta (Dec 15, 2011)

im a chick. lol
it's hard enough for me to find a decent looking guy that has _reciprocating feelings _for me. So  I understand the difficulties. But I am pretty dense too... so its a hard thing for me to realize that they do or might indeed like me. Guys need to learn to use spoken words or written, but ya know just say things. Anyways, I am a bit weird. Its hard for me to talk to people face to face as I get shy easily in public or what ever so I act a bit different or say/do silly things. I think im kinda a bimbo. lol. 

I guess my views on life are abit wierd as well. I want to say lots of things about things but they sometimes just don't come out. Takes some getting used to me, then I probably won't shut up. But normally im a pretty quiet person, in general. I like to sit in quiet and don't feel awkward then I notice the other person seems bored then I feel bad. I like to sit in company but don't often need words to express it, but i get some people do like to talk so I try to make conversation lol


dang its been a long day at the airport travels i think i am ranting.

Reactions: Agree 1


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## kanito107 (Dec 15, 2011)

Well I already had a girlfriend when I decided tarantulas were going to take over my room. At first she wasn't sure but after getting the first one she was like okay they're alright then she the versicolor I got and she fell in love and now she sometimes helps me with decisions about a next t and helps me with cleaning. She even has a ball python named skittles


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## 8leggedloverlassie (Dec 15, 2011)

I'm a chick too:biggrin:,and truthfully,I think it harder for a chick who has spiders to get a guy!,that's just my view cos the way I see it, guys will mostly be guys and its not really unusual if they have spiders or scorpions etc,but there is sorta a different expectation for girls. Now I don't want to show off,but I'm a tall,slim,and apparently attractive 21 year old and teen boys and older boys say I'm hot:biggrin:,but when they hear my hobby is tarantulas it kinda freaks them out!:: Some of them ask me with interest how I feed them and I truthfully tell them I pop a cricket in live or crush the head and offer it to them and one of them said I need help!!:sarcasm: I'm a bit into makeup and shoes and clothes:cute:but WAY more  into plants and animals and critters. and that's the way it's gonna be! I know I will be an amazing and fun and loyal GF one day but if there is no interest or at least RESPECT of my hobby,then it won't work out:cry:,I LOVE my t's:love::love:,they are my babies,and even if theyr still around when I have a real baby,they will still be my 
babies. <3 <3:love:


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## LittleSister (Dec 15, 2011)

I'm a girl as well and imo it's hard for a girl to find a partner as it is for a guy. Some guys freak out when I tell them I keep spiders, others find it fascinating but they wouldn't go near a tarantula. Also people are always suprised when they hear I adore spiders, because they have this sterotypic person in mind and I dont look like that.

Reactions: Agree 1


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## kanito107 (Dec 15, 2011)

What Im learning from this thread is: girls wake up earlier than guys

Reactions: Like 1


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## globeswitch143 (Dec 15, 2011)

my girlfriend adores my pets and brags them to her friends.. i always feel like a millions dollars.. LOL.. this Christmas she will be giving me t's and scorps as gifts... and oh yeah, i will marry her definitely.. =)


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## TGod (Dec 15, 2011)

U kidding, it was a girl that got me into the hobby I fancied for ages,plus she was French lol. To me girls 
having hobbies( like tarantula) just shows they aren't some typical hollyoaks hairdresser sort with about as much personality as a wet carrot lol.


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## Mirgrith (Dec 15, 2011)

I'm a girl too, and my bf can't stand my T's or scorpion. Nowadays he can stand them little bit better but still he doesn't like them. I'd like to have lots of more T's but my bf don't seem to like that idea. But I think it's harder for guys to find a girl who can stand T's, so good luck!


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## 1hughjazzspider (Dec 15, 2011)

iluvdortenia said:


> I'm a chick too:biggrin:,and truthfully,I think it harder for a chick who has spiders to get a guy!,that's just my view cos the way I see it, guys will mostly be guys and its not really unusual if they have spiders or scorpions etc,but there is sorta a different expectation for girls. Now I don't want to show off,but I'm a tall,slim,and apparently attractive 21 year old and teen boys and older boys say I'm hot:biggrin:,but when they hear my hobby is tarantulas it kinda freaks them out!:: Some of them ask me with interest how I feed them and I truthfully tell them I pop a cricket in live or crush the head and offer it to them and one of them said I need help!!:sarcasm: I'm a bit into makeup and shoes and clothes:cute:but WAY more  into plants and animals and critters. and that's the way it's gonna be! I know I will be an amazing and fun and loyal GF one day but if there is no interest or at least RESPECT of my hobby,then it won't work out:cry:,I LOVE my t's:love::love:,they are my babies,and even if theyr still around when I have a real baby,they will still be my
> babies. <3 <3:love:



After reading this I just have one question to ask you..... Where is Gosford and is it close to Oklahoma?

Reactions: Like 1


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## darksidemxer (Dec 15, 2011)

my girl was 100% against till we rescued dahmer *my obt* from being killed. at first she was scared then id catch her watching him and being facinated....then she bought a gbb "for me" lol. i love her, shes the perfect girl for me. smart funny cleans up real nice, can keep up witg me on the shooting range, races supermoto with me, helped me build my nissan 350z, and does schutzhund with our dog. lol ima marry her.


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## Jenthevet (Dec 15, 2011)

kanito107 said:


> What Im learning from this thread is: girls wake up earlier than guys


ha ha ha ha ha!


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## MattInNYC (Dec 15, 2011)

Hmmm, so far it sounds to me like this thread is begging for a tarantula keepers dating site.

Well, I'm a guy.  I have to say, my interest in all kinds of animals started well before my interest in dating, so it's not something I would just toss aside if someone didn't approve.  So far since I've been keeping tarantulas, I've dated one girl who actually really liked the idea of tarantula keeping, yet absolutely hated that I had centipedes.  The two after that respected that I was into them, but weren't the kind of people who would keep them themselves, and currently I'm single.

I think when it comes to hobbies and interests in general and dating, I don't necessarily need someone to share my interests, as long as they can appreciate that they're important to me.  As in, I'm not going to date someone who's putting them down, asking me when I'm gonna get rid of my stupid tarantulas or telling me I shouldn't buy another lens.  I'd have to wonder why someone would even date a person who's interests they don't approve of to begin with.  
I've actually had girls pretend to be into what I'm into in the past as well, just because they wanted to date me, then a few months into the relationship I'll find out they hate what I'm into.  Girls, please don't do that, I'd much rather be with someone who's honest right from the start.

Something else I've encountered before, which is also frustrating is people who share your interests, or claim to share them, but aren't _as_ into them as I am.  For example, I know loads of girls who are into photography, even to the point of referring to themselves as photographers, but then can't actually carry on a conversation about photography of the kind I might have with my other friends.  Not saying that's restricted to girls, but I've certainly noticed it more with girls.  Bottom line, if I say I'm interested in a given subject, that means I can have long, passionate and/or technical conversations about that subject.  So that's what I'd expect from someone else listing the same subject as a major interest.  If I have just a passing interest in something, and don't actually know much about it, I'll say so, I'm usually trying to learn as much as I can about anything that sparks my interest though.

Having said all that, I'm all for dating a girl who's actually as into tarantulas as I am, or even moreso, I don't mind at all if someone knows more than me about something I'm really into, then I can learn from them.  

Ok, at this point I'm definitely rambling, I've already had two cups of coffee, and I'm switching between browser tabs, so I actually forgot what I was going to say next.

One final point though, this might not be relevant to everyone, but it's relevant to me as an American living in NY.  When I go to reptile expos, the majority of the crowd that attends could easily be mistaken for the audience of an Opeth concert.  Nothing wrong with that, I'm a big fan of progressive rock and metal, I've seen Opeth 3 times, music is very important to me, I love horror movies and sci-fi/fantasy books... etc.  I don't dress to reflect that though, I don't really dress to reflect any kind of subculture or interest, I'm 28 and I'm not in a band, I don't have any tattoos or piercings, I don't have long hair or dyed hair.  (including a picture of myself for referenced, kind of old but I don't look much different now other than having a better camera and about another 10lbs that I'm in the process of getting rid of).







Now I'm absolutely not putting that stuff down, I wouldn't mind at all dating a girl with loads of tattoos and piercings, I'm not going to write anyone off based on their appearance.  However, in my experience, people who do dress to reflect a certain subculture tend to date other people who do as well.  So maybe I'm the one getting written off as probably not having much in common with them, and missing out on potentially great tarantula keeping girlfriend opportunities.
  For whatever reason, at least where I live, the average reptile or tarantula keeper tends to look like a metal fan/biker/suicide girl.  Is this universal?  And with that question I'll put an end to this wall of text.

---------- Post added 12-15-2011 at 08:39 AM ----------

Haha, looking at my post the picture seems to make it a lot harder to take seriously, even to me.  Hopefully some people can relate to some of the topics I brought up though.


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## Sage (Dec 15, 2011)

I'm female, 22, and a few months ago my boyfriend proposed to me.  He's borderline phobic and I suggested buying him his own sling so he can understand what it's like to care for his own t.  Despite his minor fear of giant spiders he bought me a rosehair the other day because of how bad I felt for it and petco wasn't caring for it properly (big surprise there).  Point of the story being if a person can't just accept you as you are and get over the ONE hobby of yours they don't understand, they aren't really worth your time.

And the overly fems out there that are all afraid of bugs and spiders JUST BECAUSE they're not kittens (which I adore as much as any other girl btw) then their loss for being so judgemental and closedminded.  (Even on the occasions I'd date women, the overly stereotypical girly attitude would steer me away right quick.  I guess stupidity like 'omg ew it's a spider' or 'omg like I totally think that's like weird' left me to respond with something along the likes of 'do you even know what you're talking about or are you going to further shame our gender with your uneducated comments?'  I'm rambling now but point being I don't think people know enough to back up half what they say or think.  Same thing with religion and politics but that's another story..)

Like I said when somebody really worth your time comes along, they'll accept you and your quirks.


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## groovyspider (Dec 15, 2011)

Why is it almost all the gals ok with Ts,scorps,snakes outta the us


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## darksidemxer (Dec 15, 2011)

lmao so now we are settin up a pic/datin thread lol


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## Amy Beth (Dec 15, 2011)

I am a girl and I have had several of my guy friends say they would Never come to my house if "those spiders" are there.


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## 19tarantula91 (Dec 15, 2011)

Man... I want a chick that likes Tarantulas!! That's like the sexiest thing... EVER! Anybody know a chick like that in Colorado?! Haha


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## Sage (Dec 15, 2011)

Amy Beth said:


> I am a girl and I have had several of my guy friends say they would Never come to my house if "those spiders" are there.


That saddens me.  How can people accept a snake or a rat if they can't accept a t?  If it's behind glass, it's not capable of getting to anybody on the outside.

Reactions: Like 1


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## MattInNYC (Dec 15, 2011)

Sage said:


> That saddens me.  How can people accept a snake or a rat if they can't accept a t?  If it's behind glass, it's not capable of getting to anybody on the outside.


I think it goes back to what you said before, it's mostly a lack of education and lack of exposure to these animals.  Most people have never seen a tarantula up close before, most people don't know that the majority of them aren't that dangerous.  Their exposure to tarantulas comes from horror movies and Halloween.  

When I was younger I worked as a docent at the aquarium here, and a lot of that time was spent working at the "touch tank" where people could touch live horseshoe crabs and sea stars.  I couldn't even tell you how many people thought horseshoe crabs were dangerous and venomous, and that's an animal we have locally, which you'll see at any beach.  So I can't say I'm surprised that the majority of people are apprehensive about tarantulas.

Not to mention the fact that being freaked out by them isn't exactly discouraged either.  If someone says "Eww a spider!" people around them are usually more likely to agree than say "You're being ridiculous" or provide any information about why they're nothing to be scared of for example.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Ultum4Spiderz (Dec 15, 2011)

We need to make Ts as famous as dogs  so girls will all luv em .. im single but I dont think it has anything to do with the Ts ..T lover Dating site... sounds kinda weird... =/ maybe a Site for Animal lovers?


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## MattInNYC (Dec 15, 2011)

I'm getting the impression that people don't realize I was being sarcastic with the tarantula keepers dating site comment.  It was just funny that a guy saying he can't find a girl into them was followed up by a whole bunch of girls saying the same thing about guys.

Consider this though, there are going to some people who will share the same interest as you, be into the same music, into tarantulas, etc... but you won't be able to stand them as a person.  Others you may get along great with despite not sharing any interests.  So that kind of thing, much like dating sites based on musical interest or any other hobby/passion work a lot better than theory than in practice.  Shared interests don't always result in compatibility.


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## ElevenBravo (Dec 15, 2011)

It would be cool to say to a girl that I have 9 tarantulas and her say back to me thats it and then call me a underachiever. Prolly never happen but I can dream.

I do agree shared intrests do not always result in compatibility but it sure would be nice.


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## vickywild (Dec 15, 2011)

I'm a 21 year old lassie . I have a fiancee, we're getting married next year and when I moved in with him he bought my *only spider at the time, the ammount of animals has more then tripled since then ahem* a tank and substrate so I didn't have to make the 12 hour journey with my suitcases, a tank and the rest of my stuff 

However, he still doesn't *love* my spiders, and I don't think he ever will. As long as theres respect from both sides its okay though. I respect he doesn't overly like them and he respects they are my pride and joy.


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## le-thomas (Dec 15, 2011)

kanito107 said:


> what im learning from this thread is: Girls wake up earlier than guys o.o


hahahahahhaa


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## 8leggedloverlassie (Dec 15, 2011)

1hughjazzspider said:


> After reading this I just have one question to ask you..... Where is Gosford and is it close to Oklahoma?


 haha :sarcasm:It's in nsw Australia,not close at all! 

---------- Post added 12-16-2011 at 09:22 AM ----------




MattInNYC said:


> I'm getting the impression that people don't realize I was being sarcastic with the tarantula keepers dating site comment.  It was just funny that a guy saying he can't find a girl into them was followed up by a whole bunch of girls saying the same thing about guys.
> 
> Consider this though, there are going to some people who will share the same interest as you, be into the same music, into tarantulas, etc... but you won't be able to stand them as a person.  Others you may get along great with despite not sharing any interests.  So that kind of thing, much like dating sites based on musical interest or any other hobby/passion work a lot better than theory than in practice.  Shared interests don't always result in compatibility.


 well I hope I bump into that sorta guy soon!!!:sarcasm:

---------- Post added 12-16-2011 at 09:26 AM ----------




ElevenBravo said:


> It would be cool to say to a girl that I have 9 tarantulas and her say back to me thats it and then call me a underachiever. Prolly never happen but I can dream.
> 
> I do agree shared intrests do not always result in compatibility but it sure would be nice.


You have 9 tarantulas?? Thats it! Your an underachiever:sarcasm:

---------- Post added 12-16-2011 at 09:27 AM ----------




ElevenBravo said:


> It would be cool to say to a girl that I have 9 tarantulas and her say back to me thats it and then call me a underachiever. Prolly never happen but I can dream.
> 
> I do agree shared intrests do not always result in compatibility but it sure would be nice.


You have 9 tarantulas?? Thats it!?!?? Your an underachiever:sarcasm:


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## Transient (Dec 15, 2011)

My guy friends are baffled that I would want to hold a spider/snake/lizard. Before I got my Ts I would pick up any spider (non-lethal of course) and hold it, same for any other critter that wandered into my house. A former roommate actually screamed when I had to remove a grass spider from his bathroom. 
Most of the boys I've met are huge wussies. :laugh:


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## captmarga (Dec 15, 2011)

You think it's hard for a 22 year old chick to get a date... try a 40-something widow who has 170 plus Ts! (Not counting the 1st instars, yet).  They aren't even in my house, they are in my office.  

I'm not skinny, I'm well-rounded.  My photos are on FB.  I have lots of male friends, but none that want to date The Spider Queen.  I'm an artist, a writer, I'm employed. I can sew, cook, I can dance, I can ride a horse, shoot a gun, catch/clean a fish.  I even have a boat on the lake.  I can be the tomboy gal-next-door or Her Majesty complete with ball gown and tiara. 

Sign me up for the T lover's dating site.   No joke about the ...." must like x,y, z... send photos of Tarantulas..."

Marga

Reactions: Like 1


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## Silverrose (Dec 15, 2011)

Lol, this thread is great.  I consider myself a girlie girl... so a lot of my friends are completely weirded out that I have always owned the strangest critters.  With my ex, I was unable to keep anything that wriggled or crawled, so that really sucked.  Now that I am single (and ready to mingle...hah), my T collection is small, but growing.  And I keep thinking to myself, why the heck didn't I own T's earlier!?!  But now that I do have "creepy crawlies" around, I also find it hard to find a guy that appreciates them as much as I do.  Strangely, there are many guys who are really freaked out by spiders!  It just makes me laugh that I have more cojones than some dudes. lol!


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## neubii18 (Dec 15, 2011)

MattInNYC said:


> Hmmm, so far it sounds to me like this thread is begging for a tarantula keepers dating site.
> 
> Well, I'm a guy.  I have to say, my interest in all kinds of animals started well before my interest in dating, so it's not something I would just toss aside if someone didn't approve.  So far since I've been keeping tarantulas, I've dated one girl who actually really liked the idea of tarantula keeping, yet absolutely hated that I had centipedes.  The two after that respected that I was into them, but weren't the kind of people who would keep them themselves, and currently I'm single.
> 
> ...


Haha trust me, people in the reptile and invert culture tend to dress exactly like that, even here on the good ol' West Coast!


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## boxofsorrows (Dec 15, 2011)

I'm lucky, my wife finds them fascinating and beautiful, but she's very much a creature person anyway, she's also a terrible enabler!

Humans on the other hand she's not so keen on and barely tolerates


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## GriffinSmith (Dec 15, 2011)

My girlfriend accepts them, I don't know if she likes them, the same way I do anyway but she holds my avic from time to time haha. It's my only nice T


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## AbraxasComplex (Dec 15, 2011)

Try being a gay man with tarantulas... I had people spreading rumours that I needed to place my tarantulas on people during sex in order to get off. I endured several years of wondering why people were throwing bestiality insults my way until someone flat out asked me if the rumour he heard was true.

The phobias may be the same in my dating pool, but the superficiality is 10 times worse.


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## BrettG (Dec 15, 2011)

AbraxasComplex said:


> Try being a gay man with tarantulas... I had people spreading rumours that I needed to place my tarantulas on people during sex in order to get off. I endured several years of wondering why people were throwing bestiality insults my way until someone flat out asked me if the rumour he heard was true.
> 
> The phobias may be the same in my dating pool, but the superficiality is 10 times worse.


Shoulda asked him if he wanted to find out...That woulda been great. Buncha idiots it sounds like..
That said,my better half,Kelly,has more spiders than I do.I hang my head in shame....

Reactions: Like 1


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## Amoeba (Dec 15, 2011)

I saw the words "Opeth" and "girls" and assumed there was a "is for" between them  

Just mack on the girls on the boards why do you think there are threads about pictures and crushes.


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## zonbonzovi (Dec 15, 2011)

My wife doesn't even bat an eye when I come home with a box anymore other than to say,"Please tell me that's not another 'pede."  Sorry, dear.  Despite escapes, weird smells, scrambling to find a caretaker for vacations & me digging around in relatives' yards with container in hand she's accepted that my obsessions are part of my makeup.  It wasn't always that way and I'm sure she's occasionally annoyed by me designing trips around bug hunting, but hey, it could be football or bird taxidermy or cross-stitch or amateur wrestling or maintaining a massive toenail clipping collection.


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## Slevin (Dec 15, 2011)

In my experience, at least in my circle of people I interact with, guys have always been more afraid of my tarantulas than girls. My best friend won't come near them and warns me if I take one out he'll scream and kick it. My ex-girlfriend? No problems with them at all. My ex-roommate? His words when I first brought home a tarantula were "I HATE it." Random friend that is female? "Ohhh, can I hold one?"


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## BrettG (Dec 15, 2011)

I have noticed that too. Guys just being complete wuss's over a spider,while girls seem more interested.


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## InvertFix (Dec 15, 2011)

My husband is the one who doesn't like my critters or sharing the house with them. :/


Using Tapatalk on my iPhone 4S.


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## 1hughjazzspider (Dec 15, 2011)

iluvdortenia said:


> haha :sarcasm:It's in nsw Australia,not close at all!





Well that's just a short(long) flight away I don't see why it couldn't work....


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## Bjamin (Dec 15, 2011)

My wife loves our T's she has nothing but T's on her Christmas list damn I love that girl


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## 1hughjazzspider (Dec 15, 2011)

AbraxasComplex said:


> I had people spreading rumours that I needed to place my tarantulas on people during sex in order to get off.



That's just terrible. While I'm not gay myself some of my friends give me a hard time by saying virtually the same thing, and it's always my friends who are women that say this. So I feel your pain bro.


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## le-thomas (Dec 15, 2011)

AbraxasComplex said:


> Try being a gay man with tarantulas


Made my day for some reason


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## Delight (Dec 15, 2011)

AbraxasComplex said:


> Try being a gay man with tarantulas... I had people spreading rumours that I needed to place my tarantulas on people during sex in order to get off. I endured several years of wondering why people were throwing bestiality insults my way until someone flat out asked me if the rumour he heard was true.
> 
> The phobias may be the same in my dating pool, but the superficiality is 10 times worse.


That's awful. I hadn't actually thought about that until now. It makes sense that it would be worse, though, especially in a culture that can be pretty judgmental sometimes. My only suggestion is to try to find a cute gay science geek. They're often reasonably tolerant of critters and would probably be exited to come across anyone who could use scientific nomenclature.


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## Mekster (Dec 15, 2011)

when i started collecting T's, i have to get the approval of my GF since we are living together eventhough she's afraid. I also started to collect slings to so her 1st impression of T's are not that scary


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## desertanimal (Dec 16, 2011)

I'm not a guy but my wife doesn't mind the T's, as long as they don't start taking over the office. I think she likes them better than the geckos I had.  She actually LOVES lizards, but didn't love the tub of roaches I kept in the living room to feed them.  The two T's I have can do fine on a small tub of mealworms.  She also doesn't mind the snakes or dead rodents that take up 1/4 of the freezer. She wouldn't choose any of those pets, but she doesn't mind them and doesn't mind if I want to keep them.  She really only minds if I'm too cluttery with them being in the living space.  I think that's fair, and she has put up plenty with them being an eyesore in the living space anyway.  We compromise on that.  But, she knew she was marrying a field primatologist, so I'm sure she didn't expect any different on the critter front.  She even goes herping with me and is great at spotting lizards and likes to look at rattlesnakes and such, she just gets a little bored when I photograph one for 10 minutes.  She doesn't share my hobby, but in our case, that doesn't really matter, because we share work instead (she is also a biological anthropologist).  I can see though, that if you didn't share a career, you'd want to share your hobbies with your SO.

Abraxas, +1 on the bio geek angle.


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## happysmile88 (Dec 16, 2011)

My girlfriend tolerates them but she always says "please don't buy more spiders, but things for me instead."


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## Kungfujoe (Dec 16, 2011)

My girl friend doesnt mind as long as i spend as much time with her as I do with my T's.


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## littleredrider (Dec 16, 2011)

I'm another chick who owns tarantulas, and I actually got my boyfriend into them after we hooked up  It was very difficult finding a man who is actually interested in spiders - lots of guys say they aren't scared of them, but they have no desire to look at or hold them! Such liars! But I'm glad I finally found one who is as in love with them as I am.


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## 8leggedloverlassie (Dec 16, 2011)

1hughjazzspider said:


> Well that's just a short(long) flight away I don't see why it couldn't work....


 :sarcasm:


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## jayefbe (Dec 16, 2011)

My girlfriend is super into my spiders.


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## ShadowBlade (Dec 16, 2011)

iluvdortenia said:


> I'm a chick too:biggrin:,and truthfully,I think it harder for a chick who has spiders to get a guy!,that's just my view cos the way I see it, guys will mostly be guys and its not really unusual if they have spiders or scorpions etc,but there is sorta a different expectation for girls. Now I don't want to show off,but I'm a tall,slim,and apparently attractive 21 year old and teen boys and older boys say I'm hot:biggrin:,but when they hear my hobby is tarantulas it kinda freaks them out!:: Some of them ask me with interest how I feed them and I truthfully tell them I pop a cricket in live or crush the head and offer it to them and one of them said I need help!!:sarcasm: I'm a bit into makeup and shoes and clothes:cute:but WAY more  into plants and animals and critters. and that's the way it's gonna be! I know I will be an amazing and fun and loyal GF one day but if there is no interest or at least RESPECT of my hobby,then it won't work out:cry:,I LOVE my t's:love::love:,they are my babies,and even if theyr still around when I have a real baby,they will still be my
> babies. <3 <3:love:


Holy cow... are you related to a Phil_Jones in Europe?

Also, nice btw.. I'll probably be visiting your country on my next deployment. We go there sometimes when we deploy to Guam.

You'd all be surprised how many relationships (however sour) and even marriages have risen from these boards.

-Sean


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## Rob1985 (Dec 16, 2011)

I am single... my ex hated them though. Now it's just me, the T's and my boy "Blue"! (Russian Blue)


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## Earth Tiger (Dec 16, 2011)

TGod said:


> Just wondering have any of you been lucky enough to find a girl who doesn't mind the fact that you share your house with enormous spiders. In my experience most girls don't even want to enter my mine cause of one pet. It generally annoyes me, "there in a friggin tank, they have NEVER escaped, it's not like I let them roam free lol. Anyway if I found a girl that would actually go as far as buying me a T or even hold one, I think I would marry her on the spot lol.


It isn't that hard to find a girl to love you enough to love your pets too. Also it is your responsibility to educate her to develop at least a neutral attitude towards these arachnids.

My wife feared spiders before she knew me, and at my influence she is a spider lover now. This is partially because she is a clinical psychologist and she understood better than most people how one's fear on something could be totally unnecessary and irrational. 

Good luck on your guest to find a girl that loves you and your pets. In fact there are lots of female users here...


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## KenTheBugGuy (Dec 16, 2011)

Well I did marry mine    She is definately one of a kind


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## ElevenBravo (Dec 16, 2011)

iluvdortenia said:


> haha :sarcasm:It's in nsw Australia,not close at all!
> 
> ---------- Post added 12-16-2011 at 09:22 AM ----------
> 
> ...


I love you


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## 8leggedloverlassie (Dec 16, 2011)

ShadowBlade said:


> Holy cow... are you related to a Phil_Jones in Europe?
> 
> Also, nice btw.. I'll probably be visiting your country on my next deployment. We go there sometimes when we deploy to Guam.
> 
> ...


I think u replied to th wrong thread:sarcasm: are u replying to th photo? Cos thats not me :0b

---------- Post added 12-17-2011 at 09:33 AM ----------




ElevenBravo said:


> I love you


:cute::biggrin:

---------- Post added 12-17-2011 at 09:38 AM ----------

[HR][/HR]





desertanimal said:


> I'm not a guy but my wife doesn't mind the T's, as long as they don't start taking over the office. I think she likes them better than the geckos I had.  She actually LOVES lizards, but didn't love the tub of roaches I kept in the living room to feed them.  The two T's I have can do fine on a small tub of mealworms.  She also doesn't mind the snakes or dead rodents that take up 1/4 of the freezer. She wouldn't choose any of those pets, but she doesn't mind them and doesn't mind if I want to keep them.  She really only minds if I'm too cluttery with them being in the living space.  I think that's fair, and she has put up plenty with them being an eyesore in the living space anyway.  We compromise on that.  But, she knew she was marrying a field primatologist, so I'm sure she didn't expect any different on the critter front.  She even goes herping with me and is great at spotting lizards and likes to look at rattlesnakes and such, she just gets a little bored when I photograph one for 10 minutes.  She doesn't share my hobby, but in our case, that doesn't really matter, because we share work instead (she is also a biological anthropologist).  I can see though, that if you didn't share a career, you'd want to share your hobbies with your SO.
> 
> Abraxas, +1 on the bio geek angle.


Why do u have snakes in the freezer??


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## Toogledoo (Dec 16, 2011)

I'm also a 22 year old chick. I got my boyfriend into the hobby. He's always been an animal lover, but never imagined owning a tarantula until he met me. He was fascinated with them! We've been together 2 1/2 years and are up to around 80 tarantulas now. I'm surprised I found someone to accept that part of me, especially here in Kansas lol.


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## 1hughjazzspider (Dec 16, 2011)

This thread is making me depressed. God I need a girlfriend.


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## Necromion (Dec 16, 2011)

Well I'll be honest I'm a bit of an exterme and until recently hopeless case as any girl I bring home has to be used to the idea of bugs and other things in the house. Doesn't help that I've turned an entire freezer into an "bug morgue", I have an insect collection of over 500 insects (its still growing by the way, hence the morgue), I have a fish obsession (I think 3 different tanks in the bedroom is a little extreme), a cat, I'm a bit of a pack rat, and apparently being a goth doesn't help much. Oh and did I mention that I am a nationally ranked shotgun shooter. 

So well if you can't tell I thought I was a little screwed in the dating department. But I did finally find someone who well accepts me (hey I was as surprised as anyone). She wasn't to thrilled about handling and owning tarantulas but she did in the end accept them and even bought herself one at the last show we went to. although I am finding myself having to get used to larger snakes and other reptile, which really isnt that big of a deal. Although we do have to put of with some questionable comments from our friends, but hey I think I found a keeper

on a side note I teach and do demonstrations for kids and what not, and have noticed that girls are often much more willing to hold a T, or even a roach then a boy. Always has struck me as odd, considering the stereotype.


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## skar (Dec 17, 2011)

AbraxasComplex said:


> Try being a gay man with tarantulas... I had people spreading rumours that I needed to place my tarantulas on people during sex in order to get off. I endured several years of wondering why people were throwing bestiality insults my way until someone flat out asked me if the rumour he heard was true.
> 
> The phobias may be the same in my dating pool, but the superficiality is 10 times worse.


 lmao hilarious. To the op um... I don't want to jinks myself but I haven't had chicks care.. Some actually encourage me .


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## TGod (Dec 17, 2011)

I certainly got the ball rolling in this thread lol, who knew


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## Earth Tiger (Dec 17, 2011)

TGod said:


> I certainly got the ball rolling in this thread lol, who knew


Start a T lover dating site now


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## ShadowBlade (Dec 17, 2011)

iluvdortenia said:


> I think u replied to th wrong thread:sarcasm: are u replying to th photo? Cos thats not me :0b


No ma'am, I was speaking to you .

-Sean


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## WickedInverts (Dec 17, 2011)

My wife had a phobia of anything people call a bug or spider. However, I bought my first T a few months ago and she fell in love with it and we have since grown our collection to 30. We also have a Dubia colony, but she's still not to fond of that.

---------- Post added 12-17-2011 at 06:16 AM ----------




TGod said:


> I certainly got the ball rolling in this thread lol, who knew


Yeah great topic TGod.


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## desertanimal (Dec 17, 2011)

> [/COLOR][HR][/HR]Why do u have snakes in the freezer??


Good catch! That should have been snakes, or rodents in the freezer . . . Missed the important comma while tying on my phone.


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## 1hughjazzspider (Dec 17, 2011)

WickedInverts said:


> We also have a Dubia colony, but she's still not to fond of that.



Lol dude I'm not even fond of my own dubia colony.


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## Stan Schultz (Dec 17, 2011)

TGod said:


> Just wondering have any of you been lucky enough to find a girl who doesn't mind the fact that you share your house with enormous spiders. ...


Just keep looking. Reptile shows are good places to cruise for chicks. Arachnid/tarantula conferences and shows are the best places to look. Be very up front about your love of arachnids.

Only the very best girls will be willing to accept *YOU* along with *YOUR SPIDERS*! 

(Click the thumbnails for larger versions.)



TARAS show. Marguerite is wearing a green sweater with her back to the camera. (Uploaded with ImageShack.us)



TARAS show. Marguerite is sitting behind the little boy. (Uploaded with ImageShack.us)



(Uploaded with ImageShack.us)



Do you see that smile? (Uploaded with ImageShack.us)

Good things never come easily. Best of luck!


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## BimBim (Dec 17, 2011)

My girlfriend actually got me in to the hobby. We both were always really interested in all animals, then one day went went to a bug zoo and when we cam across to the spider section a man who worked there ask if anyone would like to hold a B. smithi they have. My girlfriend and i held it and shorted after decided to buy one our selves, and one B.smithi turned in to 7 T's with in 3 months.  there are plenty of girls out there who love t's and even my girlfriend's close friends now own multiple t's after showing her ours.


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## Anonymity82 (Dec 17, 2011)

I brought home an Emperor scorpion and my fiance wasn't completely freaked out. She refused to handle it but told me she would eventually. She kept asking me not to get a tarantula. I told her I probably wouldn't and not to worry about it. My scorpion died during his first molt under my care . I went to go buy an adult so I didn't have to worry about another bad molt from a scorpion. Then, from across the room, I saw my new best friend, Aragog, my Chilean rose. I brought it home expecting the worse from my fiance, but to my wonderful surprise she was intrigued and curious. She even handled it the first night!! So basically women are crazy and unpredictable and that's why I love them. Don't expect things to be so clear cut. If you can find a girl who's not afraid to come in, but is still kind of scared of T's, (without forcing it or shoving it in her face) introduce her to a very docile species and even handle it if she allows you to take it out of the cage. There's a chance she might even want to handle it too. At least be interested enough to come back. Goodluck!

---------- Post added 12-17-2011 at 12:16 PM ----------




njnolan1 said:


> I brought home an Emperor scorpion and my fiance wasn't completely freaked out. She refused to handle it but told me she would eventually. She kept asking me not to get a tarantula. I told her I probably wouldn't and not to worry about it. My scorpion died during his first molt under my care . I went to go buy an adult so I didn't have to worry about another bad molt from a scorpion. Then, from across the room, I saw my new best friend, Aragog, my Chilean rose. I brought it home expecting the worse from my fiance, but to my wonderful surprise she was intrigued and curious. She even handled it the first night!! So basically women are crazy and unpredictable and that's why I love them. Don't expect things to be so clear cut. If you can find a girl who's not afraid to come in, but is still kind of scared of T's, (without forcing it or shoving it in her face) introduce her to a very docile species and even handle it if she allows you to take it out of the cage. There's a chance she might even want to handle it too. At least be interested enough to come back. Goodluck!


This being said, all women are not the same and many women enjoy these critters. In fact the women on this website are definitely not the minority. The only people I know who actually own tarantulas are both women.


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## Mathayus (Dec 17, 2011)

It's hard enough to find a decent, good girl that isn't somehow my cousin, being a highschooler in a town of 700. The fact I like big hairy spiders just throws a monkey wrench into the mix lol


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## Shell (Dec 17, 2011)

I think if you're up front about your hobby when you meet someone new, who isn't into them, that's all you can do. 

If someone is really worth it, they will accept you for you, "weird" pets and all. If they can't accept you as a whole, they aren't worth it anyway. That's just my opinion, it's not about changing anyone, or getting them to get rid of their pets because you don't like them, it's about loving them for exactly who they are.

I know if I met someone who wanted me to get rid of any of my animals, it would be over. Not because my spiders neccessarily mean more to me then a relationship, but because it meant he didn't accept me for who I am, and I have no use for that.

You may never meet someone who shares your passion for them the way you do, but as long as they are tolerant and accepting...anything else is just a bonus.


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## Anonymity82 (Dec 17, 2011)

Shell said:


> You may never meet someone who shares your passion for them the way you do, but as long as they are tolerant and accepting...anything else is just a bonus.


Exactly. My fiance isn't a big fan and she's a big sport for listening to me ramble on about everything I learned about them or which ones I want in the future. She's just happy that I feel passionate about something.


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## TGod (Dec 17, 2011)

Could be taken the wrong way, would sound like we really REALLY love T's lol

---------- Post added 12-17-2011 at 08:48 PM ----------

Just saw your pic, sum1 loves assassins creed, I was literaly just playing that lol

---------- Post added 12-17-2011 at 08:49 PM ----------

Just saw your pic, sum1 loves assassins creed, I was literaly just playing that lol


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## Introvertebrate (Dec 17, 2011)

I was checking out the reptiles and inverts at Petland the other day.  I saw a mother and her young daughter wander into the back of the store where I was.  The mother saw the terrariums and said "Oh, I don't like this area."  She then headed back to the puppy area with her daughter in tow.  Young girls are programmed early in life to avoid anything that's not cute and cuddly.


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## Shell (Dec 17, 2011)

Introvertebrate said:


> Young girls are programmed early in life to avoid anything that's not cute and cuddly.


Many are, but not all. I used to catch all kinds of creepy crawly stuff with my dad when I was little. When I was 3, I had a pet snail, I named him and everything lol. I remember my mom finally made me let him go and I cried for days. That was NOT the only "pet" I had as a kid that others would consider weird for a little girl. 

If my daughter is afraid of bugs, snakes, lizards etc, it certainly won't be due to any fault of mine. Both my kids are interested in my collection, and they won't be told they're bad or scary or gross or any of that in my house!


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## 8leggedloverlassie (Dec 17, 2011)

ShadowBlade said:


> No ma'am, I was speaking to you .
> 
> -Sean


Oh..my bad:sarcasm:

---------- Post added 12-18-2011 at 09:24 AM ----------




desertanimal said:


> Good catch! That should have been snakes, or rodents in the freezer . . . Missed the important comma while tying on my phone.


Haha:sarcasm: PHEW! I was thinkn "THE POOR SNAKES!!" :laugh: well now I'm relieved. :sarcasm::biggrin:


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## Crysta (Dec 17, 2011)

Introvertebrate said:


> Young girls are programmed early in life to avoid anything that's not cute and cuddly.


No its not the girls who are programmed, its the influence occuring from the people around them. This can happen to guys as well, so dont stereotype chicks. lol
My mother was terrified of spiders, and I always brought them in the house as pets. I would put them up on the corner of my wall, watch them make orb webs, etc and then my mom would come and vacuum them up sadly. lol
and then I started catching the snakes on the lawn when I was around 4 - oh boy lol she wasn't very happy haha!

Reactions: Like 1


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## Introvertebrate (Dec 17, 2011)

Shell said:


> Both my kids are interested in my collection, and they won't be told they're bad or scary or gross or any of that in my house!


Good for you.



Crysta said:


> .....dont stereotype chicks. lol


It was not my intent to stereotype anyone.  My point is that kids are not always given the opportunity to decide for themselves.  Sometimes their likes and dislikes have been conditioned by their parents and/or society.


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## ShadowBlade (Dec 17, 2011)

iluvdortenia said:


> Oh..my bad:sarcasm:


Nothing to do with looks, namely because I don't know what you look like, but he had a reputation for using... um.. QUITE a bit of smilies in his posts..lol

-Sean


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## captmarga (Dec 17, 2011)

Introvertebrate said:


> I was checking out the reptiles and inverts at Petland the other day.  I saw a mother and her young daughter wander into the back of the store where I was.  The mother saw the terrariums and said "Oh, I don't like this area."  She then headed back to the puppy area with her daughter in tow.  Young girls are programmed early in life to avoid anything that's not cute and cuddly.


Others have said it, and I second/third/affirm it.  Parents influence as much as anything else.  I was that tomboy, and brought home frogs and lizards.  It wasn't until I lived on my own in college that my mom let it be known to me she not only didn't like snakes, she HATED snakes.  (I can't make the font large enough to portray the earth-shattering, oscar winning performance that went on.) She never let it influence me.  My daughter is nearly 16, and she loves all animals, including Ts and snakes, just as much as I do.  It may not find her a boyfriend anytime soon (fine by me !) but it may help her get a job. My late husband didn't mind them as long as they were caged, but he had zero interest in them.  He never discouraged our daughter from any goal she wanted, either. 

Marga


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## Transient (Dec 18, 2011)

When I was little I found a dead lizard and my mom let me drag it around on a leash. Yep.


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## venom81 (Dec 18, 2011)

my wife loves my ts now but at first she was afraid of them,there goes to show that sometimes people are afraid of what they dont understand the funny part was she did not know about my ts until she moved in, you should of seen her face...Priceless!...but anyways,if the hobby keeps increasing in popularity maybe who knows,someday in Beverly Hills will find girls with tatantulas in there purses instead of chihuahuas...i mean some people  have the impression that tarantula keepers are strange creepy wirdos... well at least here, but i bet if shakira made a music video with holding a Pokie people would be like awesome.


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## Introvertebrate (Dec 18, 2011)

captmarga said:


> ......My daughter is nearly 16, and she loves all animals, including Ts and snakes, just as much as I do.  It may not find her a boyfriend anytime soon........


No guy worth his salt would be turned away by that.


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## ecota (Dec 18, 2011)

As a girl who only digs girls, I was surprised and amused to see so many butch dykes freak out over a tarantula. My current girlfriend tolerates them, but she keeps saying no more. She better soon realize that I would rather have 500 tarantulas than a girlfriend, lol!



> I was checking out the reptiles and inverts at Petland the other day. I saw a mother and her young daughter wander into the back of the store where I was. The mother saw the terrariums and said "Oh, I don't like this area." She then headed back to the puppy area with her daughter in tow. Young girls are programmed early in life to avoid anything that's not cute and cuddly.


When my mother took us to the petstore to get fish food, she would always take us to check out the "creepy" section. She explained to us that all animals are important and beautiful, whether they are a purebred dog or a scorpion. So whenever I run into someone who is afraid of a snake, spider, bat or some other "creepy" animal, I have to ask them WTH their problem is. I just don't understand why people are afraid of such amazing creatures. I guess it varies for every family, and I am just so thankful my mom wasn't a total wuss! :]


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## Hornets inverts (Dec 18, 2011)

I've been into reptiles and inverts long before i ever started dating, some girls likes them, others refused to go near them. My current partner wasnt too fond of them when we met but now she loves them. She now has her own snakes, lizards and t's aswell as helping me take care of my collection which includes snails, spiders (T's, trapdoors, funnelwebs) scorpions, centipedes, stick insects, king crickets and roaches


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## 8leggedloverlassie (Dec 18, 2011)

Transient said:


> When I was little I found a dead lizard and my mom let me drag it around on a leash. Yep.


 :laugh:That's cute


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## ScarecrowGirl (Dec 18, 2011)

My guy is indiffmerent to all my critters, he thinks they are cool, but he doesn't adore them like I do, I'm sure I could get him hooked it I can get him a few of the more unearthly looking ones though. 

My guy friends/all of my other friends though have lost the will to come in to our part of the house, one of them was looking at my little versicolor while sitting next to my centipedes tank, he almost wet himself he saw it hanging down from the screen of the lid, that was great lol

I ask them ' what are you going to do when I have twice as many of these guys?' and they all look around uncomfortably, ha chickens!


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## ijmccollum (Dec 19, 2011)

LOL at MattinNYC!  I think you are looking for "Invertsonals".

Seriously, I am 50+ female, my hubbie of 25yrs had a premonition 30+ years ago, while we dating, that some day he would be living in a house stacked with cages full of all kinds of creatures -- had he seen the T's in his future at that time.....

He luvs me and tolerates the T's, as well as everything else.  And no, I don't have tats but I do have three piercings -- all in my ears.  The third one is for my child.  Had I more children, then I guess I would have more holes.:tongue:


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## MattInNYC (Dec 19, 2011)

ijmccollum said:


> LOL at MattinNYC!  I think you are looking for "Invertsonals".


Man, sarcasm/satire really doesn't fly on here huh?


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## LucasNorth (Dec 19, 2011)

Yah, I've been with my current girlfriend for 3 years and tarantulas came about 1 year into it.  She was fine with them (although she often made fun of me) but overall she thinks pinktoes walking is the best thing in the world. Unfortunately tarantulas are usually a deal breaker if you are searching for a date through conventional ways.  Unless you are really something special to someone right off the bat, its unlikely they will be willing to try and understand your hobby. Its for the better anyways, in my experience tarantulas have way bigger butts and way more limbs than humans.


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## ijmccollum (Dec 19, 2011)

For all you gals out there, there are guys out there that will love big butts and the girls that love them.  Case in point: my son who will marry the women of his life this June.  I know she found a special place in my heart when she said they needed an apt that allowed pets.  What kind of pets? Yes, she said a tarantula.  He not only dotes on her, he dotes on the T as well.  Of course my son did grow up in a house full of critters.


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## le-thomas (Dec 20, 2011)

ijmccollum said:


> For all you gals out there, there are guys out there that will love big butts and the girls that love them.  Case in point: my son who will marry the women of his life this June.  I know she found a special place in my heart when she said they needed an apt that allowed pets.  What kind of pets? Yes, she said a tarantula.  He not only dotes on her, he dotes on the T as well.  Of course my son did grow up in a house full of critters.


That's got to be the most adorable thing I've ever read :3


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## arachnofreek (Dec 20, 2011)

Im single right now just getting into the T life. I hope this doesnt get me even deeper into the single life lol. Hopefully there is some girl out there looking for a geeky gamer with a big reptile, arachnid, fish addiction. Somewhere and if she is out there lets hope she is fine with all the animals. :laugh: 

Anyone out there that found their love one because of some type of animal? :love:

-freek


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## RockinOutAmber (Dec 20, 2011)

Are you kidding me? My boyfriend still screams like a girl when he walks in my room and sees my tarantulas. He doesn't have a choice... I'm keeping them.


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## Its420Somewhere (Dec 20, 2011)

My girlfriend doesnt mind at all. In fact shes bought me an avicularia avicularia and Haplopelma lividum for t's, and a Leiurus quinquestriatus scorp. We also go scorpion "hunting". Weve even had some rattle snakes. Safe to say, my hobby is no issue here. We have quite the collection now


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## oldmangoon (Dec 21, 2011)

*This has gotten way out of hand, but...*

In my experience, my male friends are much more freaked out by my spiders than female friends.  I don't get it...guys that aren't otherwise afraid of much. I don't have it figured out.  My girlfriend and I have about 40 spiders now (mostly tarantulas).  I think it makes a big difference if someone can handle one and understand that they're not (necessarily) creatures that are going to eat you while you sleep.


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