# You Know You Are An Aracnophile When:



## Pennywise (Aug 26, 2005)

I am sure this has been done before but here goes.


                      You Know You Are An Arachnophile When:

1.   You feel guilty about sweeping away spider webs in your home.

2.   You are running out of shelf and table space to hold enclosures and deli cups.

3.   You no longer have to phonetically repeat the Latin Scientific Names before speaking them in public.

4.   The sound of crickets chirping drowns out the TV football game you are watching.

5.    DHL and FEDX Delivery truck drivers wink at you and say " I wonder what's in This box?"

6.    When you start talking about your hobby to friends and acquaintances, they suddenly start scratching
          themselves, act a bit uneasy and leave

7.    You begin to do all your arithmetic calculations by multiples of eight

8.    You begin to think that T. Blondi is someone you would like to spend some time with.


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## JonPaul (Aug 26, 2005)

Good list... got all but the multiples of eight.... Still.... ever start to feel an itch in your wallet perusing the dealer index?
  Thanks for the smile.

                          Jp


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## bonesmama (Aug 27, 2005)

Hehe- can I add one of my own?
9. Your friends know all the latin,common,and pet names of all your T's


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## Huk7 (Aug 27, 2005)

and No. 10......................

You yawn incessantly whilst getting an earful from your missus after she has found yet another escapee cricket admiring the view from her clean washing which is hanging up!!!!    

and maybe 11.............?

You can end up selling refigerators to Eskimo's after countess times of selling the idea to the better half of, 'just one more spider, it's only small and will take ages to grow and anyway, I need something else to use up the surplus crickets I always get'..................      

(totally from experience)


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## Beardo (Aug 27, 2005)

If you watch Lord of the Rings over and over and root for Shelob.


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## Sequin (Aug 27, 2005)

DavidBeard said:
			
		

> If you watch Lord of the Rings over and over and root for Shelob.



hahaha!!! of course.
~Meagan~


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## cacoseraph (Aug 28, 2005)

i carry at least one catching container on me at all times. i carry it to work, to visit my friends, to the dentist... everywhere!

it is made out of metal, cuz i have carried a container long enough to crack plastic 

i think i *might* have crossed over from philia to mania =P

EDIT:
oh, and i've used my always-on-me container before to catch S. polymorpha, L. mactans, Thomisidae crab spiders, Phidippus jumping spiders... and a newt or something... but only once. i don't really care to keep things with bones


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## N.W.A. (Aug 28, 2005)

12: You love your spider(s) more than you love a member in your family. I think we're all guilty of that. I can name several family member out of the blue.


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## JonPaul (Aug 28, 2005)

Oh, or if you are infamous for "correcting" movies/TV about the portrayal of arachnids, or for giving the wrong scientific name.
I got yelled at by some friends, watching some "b movie" about the 'Island of Tarantulas" or something like that.... The giant (don't even need to get into physics) tarantula had webbing comming out of it's face.... arrgh! (Oh and that all spiders hunt people)

                           JonPaul


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## Stylopidae (Aug 28, 2005)

13: Your biology proffesor wants to take a feild trip to YOUR house for class one day


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## Pennywise (Aug 28, 2005)

I like that one Evil Cheshire!


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## Hedorah99 (Aug 28, 2005)

14. You refuse to quit your part time, dead end job because it would mean not being able to acquire more spiders.


This one is true for me, anyone else?


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## Malhavoc's (Aug 28, 2005)

15)You risk limb leg gas and finacial baggin to nab the holy spiders in the middle of the night from the evil spider killing predator [The Ex!]

16) Before entering any and all relationships that if asked to choose the spiders come first.

17)You start surfing swift's price list in your sleep

18) you actualy ORDER spiders in your sleep...

19) despite the Allergic reactions to the 'Itching hairs" you continue to buy New worlders because 'their just so damn cute'

20)You step on the foot of the spider crushing meanie?


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## sunnymarcie (Aug 28, 2005)

19) despite the Allergic reactions to the 'Itching hairs" you continue to buy New worlders because 'their just so damn cute'



Draken my dear you've taken my idea and THEY ARE that damn cute 


Um..when you feed them you call them cutsie names like "fuzzy wuzzy buggy" :8o


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## BLS Blondi (Aug 28, 2005)

*Another few*

Some other possibilities are:

When you consider buying one an "investment"  (they are for me!)

When you feel you must tell everyone you meet about them--and go in great detail.

When you look at various animals in pet stores and think "hey my T. blondi would eat this."


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## Stylopidae (Aug 29, 2005)

21: You're happy to learn your house has an infestation of something because that means you won't have to buy crickets

22: Your house is infested with a species of roach your exterminator has never seen before

23: You use the term 'medically significant' when describing ANY of your pets

24: More than one relationship has ended when your GF found the spider room

25: You've used your spider room to break up with your GF

26: You put your GF's/roomate's cat outside and tell them it ran away

27: You find a T spiderling when sitting on the toilet, and you can't remember one escaping

28: You're afraid your GF is gravid

29: You hand out Lasiodora parabana slings instead of holloween candy


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## MizM (Aug 29, 2005)

30.  You have enclosures of dirt.
31.  When grocery shopping, you view of every container by it's "enclosure potential."
32.  You own no potted plants, but always keep a 20 lb. bag of organic potting soil on hand.
33. You've actually used the search term "tarantula" on e-bay.

I prefer the term arachnoholic to to arachnophile.
-phile = one that loves, likes, etc.
-aholic = one preoccupied with


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## WhyTeDraGon (Aug 29, 2005)

"your son is begging for breakfast, but your package just arrived..he'll have to wait"

"The trip to the kitchen is too long to get a knife to open the package, so a pen will work just fine, even if it belongs to the postman"


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## Huk7 (Aug 29, 2005)

you still wonder five years later about those 2 or was it 3 P.cambridgei slings that escaped in your previous house and if they are still going    

and I wonder how the new people's cat did settle in


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## cacoseraph (Aug 29, 2005)

Hedorah99 said:
			
		

> 14. You refuse to quit your part time, dead end job because it would mean not being able to acquire more spiders.
> 
> 
> This one is true for me, anyone else?


i really like my job, but me and at least one other person on here proudly admit to eating top ramen for weeks on end, to be able to afford more bugs


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## MizM (Aug 29, 2005)

cacoseraph said:
			
		

> i really like my job, but me and at least one other person on here proudly admit to eating top ramen for weeks on end, to be able to afford more bugs


I've been know to cut a few corners to save T money...


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## Jmadson13 (Aug 29, 2005)

One habit that I have along the same lines is go every where with a pair of hemostats. Obsessive? no eccentric maybe


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## Jmadson13 (Aug 29, 2005)

Heres another one:

Your the only person of the male persuasion who becomes excited at Tupperware parties.

" I wonder what I'll put in that one?"


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## Stylopidae (Aug 29, 2005)

*You know you're an arachnoholic if...*

34) You've added 3 digits to the counter on swifty's site, but never actually bought anything

35) You list your Ts as dependants on your IRS forms

36) You own a P. Metallica

37) You got that last joke

38) You tell your doctors that if they put you in a GLADWARE container with some damp paper towels, you'll be fine

39) You have more Ts in your house than the student population at the schools your kids attend

40) You've ever 'rescued' a T from a pet shop

41) You've ever told a pet shop that you'd work there just so they'd have someone who could take care of the spiders, but know that you just want the discount

42) You give your backstage passes to your favorite band to your best friend because the band is in town on feeding night

43) You tell your (male) friends you 'pulled your sack' or 'cut your sack open' and they don't grimace

44) You post on these boards and don't own a single invert pet


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## Thoth (Aug 29, 2005)

You ask your future spouse so how many ts do you what to have? (still looking for the one that answers more than 0)

Someone mentions tees and the last thing you think of is a shirt (or a golf accessory)?

This site is the closest you get to human contact with the exception of the guy you get your crickets from.

Seriously consider moving to where ts roam wild.

Forget about eating top ramen for months, try to sell a kidney to expand your collection.


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## Malhavoc's (Aug 30, 2005)

*giggle* when claim "aww arnt you cute..When a Deffensive t rears up. You exclaim "haha missed me" when they strike the air..You exlcaim Oh, lucky shot you MUSt be hungery when they get you...


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## NickS1004 (Aug 30, 2005)

you lose sleep because your favorite spider might be a male...

one of your spiders has holed itself up for a few weeks.. your decide that you need a new one

a family member discovers the digital camera set on macro mode, with 1100 pictures of what appears to them as just dirt filled containers

you were late for work because you were watching one of your spiders moult

you watch nervously with a tweezers as one of your spiderlings battles a prey item that might be slightly too large

your spider with 7 legs just moulted.. you count three or more times to verify that it now has 8 legs

you were caught digging through the garbage because someone threw out a pretzel container that you could use for your new avic

you are in and out of the nearest reptile swap in less than a minute because you know exactly where the spider dealers tables are.. and you already have species selected and held for you by the dealer

you were bit and lived through it... you secretly feel cooler

you are ashamed of yourself because you did something to make your 
G. pulchra mad


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## JohnxII (Aug 30, 2005)

- Your bathroom/kitchen has an unusual collection of used bottle caps and jar lids

- You ban the use of insecticides/anti-lice smoke bombs etc. in the house, despite your family members' constant complain about mosquito/louse bites

- Your room really needs a paint job, but it would be a pain in the butt to move all the enclosures of your 8-legged friends. So you can't be bothered.


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## MizM (Aug 30, 2005)

Here's on for the arachnogirls. I just did this not 1/2 hour ago:

You drive home with a deli cup containing a H. lividum between your legs under your skirt so the direct sunlight won't hit it.


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## Katronmaster (Sep 1, 2005)

- You recived three critter keepers for X-mas, and you were more thrilled than the guy who got an Xbox. 

- You consider a mate only to be worth keeping if he doesn't mind a T. Blondi in the house.

- You know exactly 29 tanks can be crammed in one Toyota. 

- Someone drops a spider on you and your response is " Aweeee, cute!"

- You can identify said spider in a matter of moments. 

- You order millipedes from Swift's Inverts just so you can get the freebie spiderling. That way you can tell your parent/spouse this thing just happened to come along and you had no say in it... (Guilty.)


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## cacoseraph (Sep 1, 2005)

MizM said:
			
		

> I've been know to cut a few corners to save T money...


it's not *really*our fault though.. Southern California is rediculously expensive to live in!

heh, that's the truth and i'm sticking to it


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## Wolfy72 (Sep 2, 2005)

You know you're an Arachno Addict When........

You're walking through Wal-Mart and you see Tupperware Food  containers,,,  and you think "OHhhh Woow" That would make an awesome Pokie Tank !!! :wall:  :wall:


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## Gesticulator (Sep 2, 2005)

MizM said:
			
		

> 30.  You have enclosures of dirt.
> 31.  When grocery shopping, you view of every container by it's "enclosure potential."
> 32.  You own no potted plants, but always keep a 20 lb. bag of organic potting soil on hand.
> 33. You've actually used the search term "tarantula" on e-bay.
> ...


OMG,  I swear I was planning on adding the EXACT same thoughts....
arachnophile sounds a bit perverted
Shopping in the supermarket and choosing the brand with the best container for a "spider-home"
and yes, I've searched Tarantula on e-Bay and have 2 really cute pewter charms.

And another...browsing in walmarts garden center and purchasing all sizes of clay flower pots to accomodate various sized spiders. I've yet to find "vermiculite" but the quest continues!

As well as when your child wants a toy that can be used as a "hide" for the T's when he's done playing with it.

How about Reading every children's book about spiders and tarantulas and making comments because the author is "wrong"

Getting annoyed because Barnes and Noble hasn't one book about Tarantulas...how dare they!

Wanting to plan a curriculum for my students about Tarantulas so that I can bring in some of mine, even though it's not tolerated in NYC.


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## Jmadson13 (Sep 2, 2005)

When every password, security question, email adress and birthday reminder happens to be some sort of theraposid taxonomic description.


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## Windchaser (Sep 2, 2005)

You look forward to and plan for months your annual visit to your kids' schools to do the tarantula presentation.

Your kids and you have detailed discussions about tarantulas while eating out in restaurants much to the horror of people around you. Then, you try to educate them why they are nasty killers.

While on long car trips, play spelling games with the scientific names of the tarantulas you own. (Mind you, this has been done when my kids were as young as 5)

You plan your summer vacation around a tarantula conference.


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## bonesmama (Sep 2, 2005)

Everyone you know buys you every little thing with any kind of spider on it!


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## Gesticulator (Sep 3, 2005)

You've been an itinerant teacher for fifteen years and never thought of buying a label maker until it was absolutely necessary to label each T's tank with it's scientific,common and given name....


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## Schlyne (Sep 3, 2005)

You have a stuffed, fuzzy spider in your bedroom.







The T's have a room to themselves.

You have inverts in your bedroom and don't think anything of it.

You've dliberately spent an afternoon chasing a T around the batheroom becuase you wanted pictures.

You realize you've probably paid for your dealer's gas money to get to the show.

You have a box of deli cups just sitting around.

You have a lot of paintbrushes and no paint.

You got excited about baby roaches. (no more crickets)!

You buy shoeboxes by the case.

You don't care about the pretzels, you wanted the barrel.  (I have pretzels for anybody who wants some on my desk at work.  I do eat the pretzels though.)

You have arachnid jewelry.

You have arachnid posters.


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## Stylopidae (Sep 3, 2005)

You buy a case of 2,500 deli cups and know exactly what's going in each and every one of them (L parabana breeders know exactly what I'm talking about  ;P  )

Forget a T room, you have a T floor

You can correct an arachnologist

Your kids can correct an arachnologist

You've smoked 250 cigars in one night

You have more 10 gallon tanks than a marine biology class located in Iowa


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## Comatose (Sep 3, 2005)

Ha Ha Ha..... You can't get a girl into your room but you still won't hide the damn things in the closet


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## bagheera (Sep 4, 2005)

You coerce a world class silversmith to do a tarantula, and criticize the anatomical details.


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## Schlyne (Sep 4, 2005)

You've ever gone "What's one more?  It's just one"


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## Stylopidae (Sep 5, 2005)

This one is me right now

You're all set up to move out of your house and your parents give you plastic boxes to move, but you only take the ones you can breed feeders in


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## harrymaculata (Sep 5, 2005)

1.when you actually find your 8" c.crawshayai funy when its hissing and striking :clap: 
2. When you find s.calceatum cute little fuzz balls


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## Stylopidae (Sep 5, 2005)

harrymaculata said:
			
		

> 1.when you actually find your 8" c.crawshayai funy when its hissing and striking :clap:
> 2. When you find s.calceatum cute little fuzz balls



You know exactly what harrymaculata is talking about ^  ;P


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## Camberwell (Sep 5, 2005)

When you come in and go straight into your spider room and look in the tanks before you even get your coat and shoes off. (i do this) i just have to see them as soon as i get in


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## Apocalypstick (Sep 5, 2005)

I look at mine 1st thing every morning... T before PEE... gotta be an addict


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## Cirith Ungol (Sep 5, 2005)

Schlyne said:
			
		

> You have a stuffed, fuzzy spider in your bedroom.


Haha... I do  

...When you have gotten hold of more shelving rawmaterial than you could ever possibly put up the walls (me right now).

...When you have had a talk with "the normals" about T's and have to get back to them a day later to correct something you said yesterday.

...When you've basically stopped useing your speakers but use headphones instead at all times.

...When you nearly get a heart-attack if you can't get onto this site for some reason.

...When you leave home for a few days and instead of thinking "Did I lock the door?" you go, "I wonder if they have enough water?".

...When you feed your pillbugs pinky remains.

...heck! If you HAVE pillbugs   

...If you calculate how many Ts you can feed before you have to take the bus in 20 minutes

Edit...
...AND when more than 1/3 of the stuff in the freezer is roach food...


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## Apocalypstick (Sep 7, 2005)

...if you are an authority on how filthy and disgusting
crickets are and realize they only exist to feed Ts


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## OldHag (Sep 7, 2005)

When your husband complains that you treat your bugs better than you treat him!! :O


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## Stylopidae (Sep 7, 2005)

Your Ts have sex more often than you do


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## bug2 (Sep 10, 2005)

- When the top pops off a pill bottle at a restaurant after the show and your best friends all drop to the floor to keep your new T from becoming "road kill".

- When you drive clear across town to visit someone just so that you can exchange males

- When you begin finding conversations about anything else just a waste of time when you could be feeding T's instead. 

- When your DHL guy knows your address by heart.

- When your dealer knows your address by heart.

- When you make more then the minimum payment on your credit card "just in case" you need to buy another one.


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## Stylopidae (May 22, 2006)

Bump

When you've laughed at anything on this thread:

http://www.arachnoboards.com/ab/showthread.php?t=67751

I'm all sclerotized and ready to go, baby.


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## tima (May 22, 2006)

Evil Cheshire said:
			
		

> Your Ts have sex more often than you do


Well, equally as often, until they mature, at least.  Then it'll be more.


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## Apocalypstick (May 24, 2006)

When your T is molting and you scream at everyone in the house to shutup, don't go anywhere near the tank, walk softly coz I'll kill you if vibrations are produced, no stereo or TV (vibrations), and you shoot the guy passing by on a motorcycle with a BB gun..... Oh yeah :}


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## Scorpendra (May 24, 2006)

you act as though you/your wife had a baby every time one of your Ts molt.


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## ChrisNCT (May 24, 2006)

When I have my bug hating co-workers come to work intelling me they had a dream about a eggsack.


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## bananaman (May 24, 2006)

the only reason you know photography terms and can have a good conversastion with a professional photographer is because you got into it to take pictures of your Ts

when you see the term "world wide web" and giggle because you think about spiders

when everything reminds you of them

when you have tarantula documentary DVDs

when your friends politely ask you to stop talking about them...

when you have more tweezers in your room than a medical professional

you find it funny to find an avic outside of its enclosure

you sleep to the sound of crickets chirping

the only thing that got you to stop smoking was to spend the money on Ts

your computers wallpaper is a giant hairy spider

 this thread is great  later


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## kitty_b (May 24, 2006)

:8o 

so many of these apply to me...

i'm expecting #17 tomorrow, and hopefully #18-20 next week


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## stubby8th (May 26, 2006)

When you show your 5yr. old your 'Red-knee' and he corrects you by saying "no daddy, that's a Brachypelma smithi".

When you have piles of clothes on the floor of your closet and not hanging because you needed more 'shelf-space'.

When you're at Walmart and practically every type of container they carry can be sized up as tarantula housing or good for a roach colony.


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## harmroelf (May 26, 2006)

When you sit 3 hours on your knees before the tank to see you're spider molt, while you're gf has made dinner as a suprise end wait's donwstairs, calling you every 5 minutes, and you just sit there...


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## kitty_b (May 26, 2006)

i'd like to second the symptom of: every container and shelving unit is assessed as "would this be good for displaying/storing my T's?"


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## dangerprone69 (May 26, 2006)

You size up small dogs and wonder if a T. blondi could take 'em.

You send obsessive fan letters to Rick West.

You have tarantula-sized birthday hats for their birthday parties.

On their birthdays, you stick a candle on a roach and sing "Happy Birthday" to them.


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## fangsalot (May 26, 2006)

when your spouse/family is dying to use the bathroom,but your locked in there transfering your spiders to new enclosures.


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## smof (May 26, 2006)

I definitely agree with the sizing up of random containers as spider homes, I do that all the time!

Also, when your arachnophobic housemates refuse to answer the door to delivery guys any more.


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## kimski (May 26, 2006)

When you work(ed) at Oriental Trading and had over 1,000,000 sq ft of warehouse space to choose ANY toy you wanted like fake vomit and rolling eyeballs and your desk was covered in 'Spider stuff', like the huge plastic Tarantula... or the fuzzy stuffed one, or an assortment of spider rings, or the stickers, and pencils with spiders on them and spider toppers on your pens, or the... well you get the picture.

Oh, and having all your colleages (even the ones who designed the stuff) er, not come visit your desk cuz it creeped them out... 

And for all your parties; for funky and cheap arachnid-stuff decorations, thangs and gizmos, check out www.orientaltrading.com


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## Prometheusmum (May 30, 2006)

When you have your friend come over to see your T's for the first time and she calls them ugly, you insist that she leave and turn to your bugs and say "she doesnt know what she's talking about, your all beautiful and mummy loves you very much".

You dont buy your anniversary present because the T was so cheap you couldnt refuse, (I'm glad my boyfriend is a good sport).


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## Parahybana3590 (May 30, 2006)

I definately agree with the "assessing small dogs" one (except for me, it is a L. Parahybana).

When you look at yourself in the mirror and ask "What can I sell on the black market without killing me?"

When you know what you can sell, and how many T's you can get.

When you can give the scientific name of any T they use on the movies.

After just placing an order you try desperately to raise up money to order the T you really wanted on another site.

You find enjoyment in watching crickets getting tagged.

You find yourself ready for a T "with more spunk" than the ones you have now.


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## Hedorah99 (May 30, 2006)

Dunno if this is already done:

When you take a personal day so someone can sign for your latest shipment.


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## Nightshade (May 31, 2006)

*great thread!*

how about

When you see a spider crawling up the wall in school/at work/at a friend's house, you put it outside or if you can't readily get outside you try to coax it away so it won't get squished.

When some guy jokes with you at your Scrubway job that "Now you'll know how to feed your kids when you're married." and you respond with
"The only child I'll ever have is my Desiderius. Watching her slaughter crickets brings me more joy than I ever dreamed was possible." And when the next customer attempts to tell you that you've made her lose her appetite, you miss it because you're still thinking about your spider.
(My boss chided me for it afterwards, but I saw him laughing!)

When you keep spiders in the entertainment unit instead of a TV or stereo.

When you own a VCR and a DVD player and a Super Nintendo, but you haven't bought a cheap secondhand TV to hook any of that stuff up to because you're eyeing a new spider or two.


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## Tcrazy (Jun 2, 2006)

When you get a job at petsmart just so you can get the 15% discount on crickets and critter keepers.


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## ShadowBlade (Jun 2, 2006)

When your wife writes the grocery list on one side of the paper, and u write your cage/food/etc. needs on the back.

When on vacation, u worry if your favorite T has molted yet, instead of "Do u think the kids are okay with Grandma?"

And when u get back, u go check the T's, instead of seeing if the dog got in the trash...


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## Water spider (Jun 2, 2006)

When you are afraid to wash your hair, because there still might be some spiders, and you dont want to harm them.


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## treeweta (Jun 2, 2006)

when you stay in on a friday night because your spider is on its back and you dont want to miss the moult. OK i dont really go out now but 10-15 years ago, yes i did.

treeweta.


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## silverpenny (Jun 9, 2006)

...when you find a one inch spider in a web in the corner of the laundry room and you say, "Well, hi there, little guy!"


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## silverpenny (Jun 9, 2006)

You have named one of your Fantasy Sports Teams "The Pink Toes."


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## GailC (Jun 9, 2006)

when you move all stray jumping spiders you find in your home into the roach bin so they can eat good.


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## bananaman (Jun 9, 2006)

You smile every time you see the number 8... and then get on a train of thought about how cool your Ts are...

When you daydream about the cool Ts you want and the ones you are about to get in the mail...


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## sammyp (Jun 9, 2006)

All your clothes are in neat little piles on the floor, cause using your chest of drawers would disturb the T in the enclosure on top


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## Scorpendra (Jun 9, 2006)

when someone pulls a school prank involving releasing a load of crickets into the halls, and all you can think about is finding them for T food.


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## Nerri1029 (Jun 9, 2006)

- when people bring you spiders.. to ID or as Pets 

happened more than a few times.


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## becca81 (Jun 9, 2006)

dangerprone69 said:
			
		

> You size up small dogs and wonder if a T. blondi could take 'em.


Hahahahahaha!


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## Galadriel (Aug 1, 2006)

You put off the water bill for a week to buy crickets and roaches.

You look forward to your children doing show and tell so you can bring their 8 legged brothers and sisters to school.

You refer to your spiders as your childrens' brothers and sisters.  =)


Galadriel


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## EvanG (Aug 1, 2006)

You need to buy three dressers because your entire walk in closet is filled with enclosures.


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## Cirith Ungol (Aug 1, 2006)

After a drunken night you find your poop allover the bathroom walls? :?


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## Pyst (Aug 2, 2006)

The number 1 answer without a doubt:

Attending ArachnoCon !

For some it's only a short drive while for others it requires a 3 day roadtrip or several hours of flying time.


-Mike


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## Arietans (Aug 2, 2006)

You read a thread entitled "you know you are an arachnophile when..." just to see if it might be you


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## Never_2_Old (Aug 2, 2006)

When you purchase new spiders only as small slings (easy to hide containers among present collection) with money orders (not traceable).  

Because significant other says No more Tarantulas!!  You have too many already!


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## wicked (Aug 2, 2006)

*You know you are an arachnophile when...*

You devote an entire series of cartoons to tarantulas and their keepers.


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## Sunar (Aug 2, 2006)

When you think how cool it'd be if your wife had 6 more legs... 

~Fred


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## king7 (Aug 2, 2006)

'when you ask the owner ofthe petshop to lay you on a T untill you get payed'

'when you ask if they have a payment scheme'


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## Nightshade (Aug 2, 2006)

On plastic and glass recycling night, you go wandering around your ultra yuppie neighbourhood looking for plastic jars to house your babies in.


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## 8ball (Aug 2, 2006)

Whenever you feed all the free black widow's in your garage and stay away from tall grass cause wolf spider's hunt there and you dont wanna step on one


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## T 'n T (Aug 2, 2006)

During the company's annual white elephant gift exchange, you excitedly choose the huge black plastic spider everyone else eyes with revulsion. :}  

When you accidentally squeeze it, hear a squeak and realize with delight that it stridulates!  

When you figure it must be a new world spider because it has plastic urticating hairs. ;P  

When you flip it over to try your hand at ventral sexing.


----------



## king7 (Aug 3, 2006)

when you find house spiders in your bathroom and feed it crickets ;P


----------



## Scorp guy (Aug 3, 2006)

When people ask "do you have kids?" and you say "yeah, i got 400"


----------



## IguanaMama (Aug 3, 2006)

When you consider calling the ASPCA because your friend just shouted "eeeek" and squished a house spider.

When you see your son in sleep-away camp for visiting day for the first time in a month, and instead of asking if he's having a good time, you ask if there are any good spider hunting spots.  And, he pulls out a map of the camp with all the spots marked, because he knew you would ask!!!


----------



## verry_sweet (Aug 4, 2006)

When you go out for girls night out and they’ll be discussing new coach purses, their new hair color or heels :wall: over martinis and you keep bringing up the new T you have at home and your just itching to go check on it…. that’s when I get the "eeeewww Steph knock it off!!!!" ;P 

Steph


----------



## bananaman (Aug 4, 2006)

you prefer women that dont shave their legs because you think their "bristles" are cute... LOL  (was that too much?)


----------



## verry_sweet (Aug 4, 2006)

bananaman said:
			
		

> you prefer women that dont shave their legs because you think their "bristles" are cute... LOL  (was that too much?)


;P eewwwww (mental image :wall: :wall: )  ;P 

Steph


----------



## bananaman (Aug 4, 2006)

verry_sweet said:
			
		

> ;P eewwwww (mental image :wall: :wall: )  ;P
> 
> Steph


indeed  lol


----------



## Scorp guy (Aug 4, 2006)

bananaman said:
			
		

> you prefer women that dont shave their legs because you think their "bristles" are cute... LOL  (was that too much?)


anyone up for without a paddle


----------



## David DeVries (Aug 4, 2006)

...when you're on a thread with pix and you scroll down really fast so you don't look at the labels and try to ID the t by just looking at the pic

and then you get it right even if you don't have that species:}


----------



## Bedlam (Aug 4, 2006)

When your job is to clean a warehouse but you refuse to kill any spiders or destroy their webbing, which lands you in heaps of trouble after being asked to get rid of the webs over and over again.


----------



## Fingolfin (Aug 5, 2006)

When you discuss a new t on the phone in front of your wife when you are forbidden to get anymore....


----------



## Sicel1304 (Aug 5, 2006)

When your nametag at your job looks like this:


----------



## ArachnoCrazy (Aug 5, 2006)

when you have to squeeze around a huge shelf full of containers just to get to the closet which is on the other side of your bedroom every morning.


or when you run to the store just to buy container of Cheese Balls even though you hate them.


----------



## K MUELLER (Aug 5, 2006)

When you really think about joining A.A    Arachnoholics Anonomous!!!   Because you say ''just one more'', everytime you place an order. Later-Karl


----------



## mikeythefireman (Aug 6, 2006)

When you go to Costco and buy 2 5lb tubs of animal crackers and a box of gallon ziplocs to transfer the animal crackers to.  FYI: thes tubs make awesome arboreal containers.


----------



## PoPpiLLs (Aug 6, 2006)

when you order 2 slings and tell your wife the other one was a freebie so you didnt know it was coming ;P


----------



## Tropical T's (Aug 6, 2006)

When on Valentines morning instead of roses next to the bed your girlfriend finds one of your escapees 
When you convince your highly arachnophobic friend to show you where he saw the burrows and get photographic evidence of him helping catch them.


----------



## Stylopidae (Aug 6, 2006)

When you buy the pre-packaged crix just because you get a free container, even though you know they're more expensive than normal crix.


----------



## Varden (Aug 6, 2006)

When you have a "911" phone tree set up among family and friends (some of them several states away), so when you run low on bottle caps, cardboard rolls (for the crickets you raise), egg flats (for the roaches), and plastic containers (mayonaise, peanut butter, and mixed nuts--awesome sling containers), all you have to do is put out the call and everyone you know mails you what they've been hording since your last call.  It's like Christmas in the mail!


----------



## Dreadwraven (Aug 7, 2006)

When you ask the moderators if they're ever going to include a gift registry forum for those getting married.


----------



## Galadriel (Aug 7, 2006)

One of the main selling points for moving to Texas is knowing we'll be closer to ArachnoCon.


----------



## Stylopidae (Aug 7, 2006)

When you have your collection planned out four months in advance.

Check this out:

Platymeris, lobster roaches and spitting spiders, and a scolopendra heros arizonensias all before the end of this month

G.aureostriata and B. smithi in september from a friend here on the boards. P. irminia, P. imperator and L.parayhabana before the end of that month

Damon sp. whipscorps in october, right before it gets too cold to ship.

B. dubia in november and then cool off until springtime rolls around and it's warm enough to ship.

Sad ain't it?


----------



## Taylor (Aug 7, 2006)

When those irritating sales people come by to see if you want to spray your yard for spiders, your eyes get big and and your mouth drops open as you say why on earth would you do that! than slam the door shut. 

Your boyfriend just bought 13 spiders within a week of buying his first, and has overcome his phobia. True story. Now his sister is addicted too. he he he. Eventually we all get bit with the bug! mwa ha ha


----------



## Tarantula (Aug 7, 2006)

You are smiling at yourself when you read this thread..


----------



## crawldad (Aug 7, 2006)

I thought about this at 5:30am today.  I am on the way to *my* garage, to unlock *my* door, to get to *my* car, so I can get to *my* job, and I do my very best to avoid any spider webs across the opening of the door (I practically do the LIMBO).  And we all know it's not because I can't stand the feeling, I don't want to mess up all their hard work!  Sad isn't it.......................


----------



## Tegenaria (Aug 7, 2006)

you start wondering how one of those 3-D pictures would look if you had 8 eyes!


----------



## Kaos (Aug 8, 2006)

You try to convince your wife to have free roaming Nephila spiders in the living room.


----------



## lilhildy (Aug 8, 2006)

*Arachnophilic*

When you are driving on the expressway... late for work... look over into your passenger side mirror to see a horrified little spider clining to its exquisit web it made last night tight to the window trying to hang on at 65mph.  You quickly hit the brakes to slow down and watching to make sure it doesn't loose its grip, merge across two lanes of now honking traffic so you can pull over to a stop, hop out and run to open your trunk,  sort through a dozen small vials that "just happen to be there" to select the perfect home. :worship:  Ever so genlty coax the little, now "expresswayaphobic", arachnid into the vial, crawl back into your car genlty setting the new PET into the cup holder smiling at yourself like you just pulled a superman and saved the world  and are afraid to merge back into traffic because you don't want to stress it anymore; only to arrive 20min late to work,  boss confronts you for being late but you slip into your office close the door and proadly place the vial next to your computer monitor in VICTORY!!!! :clap: Then take lunch outside because you need fresh air... and a small insect for your new office assistant.  Your boss later notices the small spider in vial and asks... are you afraid to kill it... and you reply... "Its my motivation and a symble of the survival of the fittest and never letting go." Boss looks at you like why did I even ask and walks out.... as you smirk and turn the vial for a better view as it builds its new masterpiece web.

You can't wait to call your girl and tell her about your "amazing morning comute" and she tells you that you are such a freak.

Oh yeah...  your daily rutine now includes packing the usual lunch of PB&J, chips, coke.. and pinheads. 


Yeah I have it bad. ;P but rehab is for quitters!! 


And you can't wait to add your story about this day to the boards because you have to tell "your family"


----------



## bananaman (Aug 9, 2006)

lilhildy: ROFL!!! that is sweet! nice going... we all know what thats like, very well worded


----------



## Nightshade (Aug 9, 2006)

The thought of your beloved spider(s) going thirsty or hungry has saved you from committing numerous reckless and violent acts.


----------



## bananaman (Aug 9, 2006)

you havent gone on a vacation since you started keeping Ts... afraid that they'll die or the people you leave in charge wont take proper care of them...


----------



## caligulathegod (Aug 10, 2006)

When your favorite college football and basketball team is the Richmond (Va) Spiders.

(and yes, they have merchandice!)


----------



## jojobear (Aug 10, 2006)

You Know You Are An Aracnophile When: 

You are out shopping with friends and you get all excited over the display of container on sale and your friends know immediately you aren't thinking about using the containers for organizing your home but for use as another Crtiiter container.


----------



## Galadriel (Aug 10, 2006)

You consider posting a new thread, suggesting an A.A. meeting.

You're reading this and know the first "A" doesn't stand for alcohol.

You've just bought 2 S. calceatum from Botar and have shopper's high. Thanks Charles! He's going to love them  =)

You give S. calceatum to your husband for his birthday, and he says it's the best birthday present EVER!


----------



## Stylopidae (Aug 10, 2006)

When your friends consider your house a cheaper alternative to the local zoo


----------



## Tropical T's (Aug 11, 2006)

Evil Cheshire said:
			
		

> When your friends consider your house a cheaper alternative to the local zoo


When you charge your friends an entrance fee to said "zoo"


----------



## Sicel1304 (Aug 11, 2006)

lilhildy said:
			
		

> When you are driving on the expressway... late for work... look over into your passenger side mirror to see a horrified little spider clining to its exquisit web it made last night tight to the window trying to hang on at 65mph.  You quickly hit the brakes to slow down and watching to make sure it doesn't loose its grip, merge across two lanes of now honking traffic so you can pull over to a stop, hop out and run to open your trunk,  sort through a dozen small vials that "just happen to be there" to select the perfect home. :worship:  Ever so genlty coax the little, now "expresswayaphobic", arachnid into the vial, crawl back into your car genlty setting the new PET into the cup holder smiling at yourself like you just pulled a superman and saved the world  and are afraid to merge back into traffic because you don't want to stress it anymore; only to arrive 20min late to work,  boss confronts you for being late but you slip into your office close the door and proadly place the vial next to your computer monitor in VICTORY!!!! :clap: Then take lunch outside because you need fresh air... and a small insect for your new office assistant.  Your boss later notices the small spider in vial and asks... are you afraid to kill it... and you reply... "Its my motivation and a symble of the survival of the fittest and never letting go." Boss looks at you like why did I even ask and walks out.... as you smirk and turn the vial for a better view as it builds its new masterpiece web.
> 
> You can't wait to call your girl and tell her about your "amazing morning comute" and she tells you that you are such a freak.
> 
> ...



2 gold stars will now be awarded to lilhildy!


----------



## Tegenaria (Aug 12, 2006)

You just CANT stop watching it with intense fascination, even tho they do nothing!


----------



## Nightshade (Aug 12, 2006)

Tegenaria said:
			
		

> You just CANT stop watching it with intense fascination, even tho they do nothing!


SO SO TRUE!!!! I've watched my rose hairs until my bum literally went numb!

You can't trust yourself in a pet store to buy crickets with any more than $2 in your pocket.

You visit one dealer, and promise yourself not to buy any more for a couple of months, but can't resist the invitation to go to visit another dealer 2 weeks later.

Your boyfriend or significant other knows that he'll have to apologize to the spider he offended if it bites him.

You don't mind when bands you like put off the release date for their next album or the date for their next show because it gives you more chances to spend your money on more spiders

You're looking for a lamp so you'll never have to disturb your Ts by turning the bedroom light on again.

You own an electric acoustic guitar, but will only play acoustic for fear of disturbing your babies.


----------



## Drachenjager (Oct 22, 2006)

when your tarantula collection costs more than your house.

If you have ever asked your Pastor to eulogize your dearly departed male OBT.

If you purchased a new microscope for $1000 just so you can sex you slings a molt or two earlier.

You didnt get the vacuum withyour oil change because the extra money could be better spent on your new H. lividium.

You buy a gas guzzling SUV so you will have more room to bring back T's from Acon.

You spanked your grandaughter for hollering EEEEKKKK when your OBT jumped at her.

You stopped drinking beer because you couldnt share it with your best friend the T. blondi.

You have passed out  candy cigars specially made with 0.0.1000 on them .

You actually know what 0.0.1000 means.


----------



## Kriegan (Oct 22, 2006)

Ha ha ha, all is true, this thread is brilliantly awesome 

when you log on to this website 15 times a day even at work to check for new interesting threads 

when your gf gets jealous of you paying more attention to your T's than to her 

when there's a party going on in your house and you are more interested in looking at your spiders 

when no one else understands why you want to stay on a friday taking some pics of your newly arrived p metallica


----------



## Varden (Oct 22, 2006)

When watching spider porn has more excitement to it than the human variety.

When you and your husband sleep on the hide-a-bed couch because the B. albopilosum is making her eggsac in the bedroom and you won't even go upstairs for fear of disturbing her.

When the husband grumblingly abandons his comfortable bed to sleep on a very uncomfortable hide-a-bed couch because he'd rather spend the night there than in the dog house for disturbing the B. albo.

When you remove the marble sink from the master bathroom so you can install a cheap plastic utility sink deep enough to scrub out even the tall breeder tanks.  And then realize if you remove the clawfoot tub and put in shelves, you'll have room for 80 more spiders.


----------



## Alice (Oct 22, 2006)

lol, awsome thread!


...when you secretly get your self-declared arachnophobiac boyfried a g. pulchra sling because he claimed he didn't dislike you pulchra as much as the others .


----------



## Skuikki (Oct 22, 2006)

.. When you say that you'll be getting few spiders next week and your mom and grandmom shouts "NOT AGAIN!"

.. Your friends are going to a party and think you don't have any money when actually you have and it is used to pay the spiders coming next week.

Thats me allright :razz:


----------



## Kriegan (Oct 22, 2006)

when you admit the only real reason you bought that expensive camera was to take quality pictures of your spiders 

when you own an album of your spiders and not one of your gf and you proudly show it to your friends and she angrily burns it 

when you carry around a pic of your favorite spider right next to your girlfriend's picture in your wallet 

when you stop listening to music for fear of disturbing your babies


----------



## Nightshade (Oct 22, 2006)

When the man you love who was an arachnophobe at the beginning of your relationship tells you he wants a little pink toe of his own.

When you find yourself picking up adult crickets with your bare hands and six months ago you shuddered at the thought of one of them getting loose.

When you have 11 tarantulas and you're already planning what you'll be getting in the spring.

When you offer to raise slings into young juvenile Ts for friends who want them at a decent size.

When you find yourself thinking, "It's getting late, time to head off to the burrow."

When you start recreationally memorizing the names of all the spider families in North America.

Lol, I was reading the Tarantula Keeper's Guide the other night and I got to the part at the end where it talks about how you won't be able to look at spiders the same way anymore. Of course I won't be able to. Before there might have been a couple of them hiding up in the corners of my room. Now there are 11 of them sitting in what used to be a bookshelf, waiting for their next meal.


----------



## Tropical T's (Oct 23, 2006)

When you get upset because you lose the egg sac you have been tending for the last few weeks to ants or some other mishap and spend the next few days acting like you just lost a close relative


----------



## rex_arachne (Oct 23, 2006)

if you sacrifice having airconditioning in your bedroom for the sake of the inverts

if your bedroom looks like a delicup/tupperware showroom

if relatives ask what your hobby is and you tell 'em, and they say "that's... nice" and they all look at each other

when you are in the car and rave on and on to your parents about the Ts or scorps you are picking up and they would pretend to be listening and your dad would say "that is really interesting, son" or your mom would say "they sound 'wonderful', as long as you don't show them to me"

if you cuss every few minutes when feeding pinheads to your slings


----------



## Alakdan (Oct 24, 2006)

If you always convince your girlfriend that out of town trips are necessary for some quality time.  When in fact, it is a hunting trip.

It's a good thing my girlfriend understands my hobby, and has learned how to hunt as well.


----------



## Alice (Oct 24, 2006)

when you get your boyfriend to drive the 200 miles home from the show he didn't want to go to just so that you can hold the boxes with your new ts yourself.


----------



## eight leg goth (Oct 24, 2006)

when your friends hit you for talking about ts too much

when every1 walks off coz their fed up of being corrected on the prenounciation of words like grammastola


----------



## Stylopidae (Oct 24, 2006)

When your postman chides you for letting your mail pile up, but you're always there to recieve a package.


----------



## Stylopidae (Dec 8, 2006)

When you have 3 rooms in your entire house, and the third one is now the 'cooling period' room


----------



## Mr.Scorpion (Dec 8, 2006)

You stand in the longest lines at Wal-Mart just to buy a single $0.50 pot and you couldn't be happier to re-do your T's enclosure. 

I liked this one the best:

"29: You hand out Lasiodora parabana slings instead of holloween candy"


----------



## Varden (Dec 9, 2006)

When you have everyone in the family saving their pop bottle tops for water dishes, toilet paper and paper towel cardboard rolls for cricket hides, cardboard egg containers for roach hides, and all plastic peanut butter and mayonaise jars for sling and juvie containers.

When your family starts asking folks from their respective churches to start saving those things as well.

When your grandmother from Utah calls to apologize because she's been saving all those things to send you for Christmas and just when she had a big ol' box full, Grandpa came along and threw it all away.

When said grandmother begins claiming the tarantulas as her great-grandkids.

And last but not least, when your grandmother wants wallet-sized photos of some of your Ts so when her friends start showing off pictures of their great-grandkids, then she'll have something to show as well.


----------



## P.jasonius (Dec 9, 2006)

When you're not going to buy anything for you friend for christmas (who was the best man at your wedding) for smashing a scorpion on the wall instead of calling you to come take it... grrr


----------



## ShadowBlade (Dec 9, 2006)

When your Youth Pastor tells the local christian rock band to come to church to see you hold some of your T's and centipedes. 

I was... surprised, to say the least.


----------



## P.jasonius (Dec 9, 2006)

You might be an arachnophile when...
http://adsoftheworld.com/media/print/french_aids_awareness_scorpion


----------



## freeagent8891 (Dec 9, 2006)

When you find a carpenter ant colony of at least 2,500 ants in a barrel of kindling wood and transfer it to a different container, not because your worried about the wood, but because they are great for feeding your black widows.


----------



## Drachenjager (Dec 10, 2006)

If you think these panties are hotter than anything Victorias Secret has...


----------



## P.jasonius (Dec 10, 2006)

If you own spiderman underwear, but don't like spiderman because they made his webbing come out of his wrists in the movie


----------



## Parahybana3590 (Dec 11, 2006)

You talk about tarantulas and your biology teacher hasn't a clue as to what you're talking about .


----------



## funnylori (Dec 22, 2006)

You're almost late to work because your A. versicolor sling molted during the night and you wanted the exuvia to show off. 

When your coworkers ask if you have a tarantula in your apron today, and you have 3! 

When your manager convinces your coworkers that you have let loose giant tarantulas in the stock rooms to 'take care of the rat problem.'

You ask for a B. dubia colony for your 21st birthday.

When you contimplate ordering a $500 generator so that when the power goes out in the winter you wont freak out about the T's getting too cold.

You have free range spiders in your bed room, and know exactly where they hang out and when they eat.

You consider feeding your tropical fish to the T's so that you can turn the aquarium into a terrarium.

You keep carnivorus plants in your bedroom to catch the stray crickets and roaches.

You think your special edition Darth Vader Mr. Potato Head would make a really awesome hidey hole...

You wait weeks for the best drill at Sears to go on sale the day after Thanksgiving so that you can put cleaner looking air holes in terrariums. 

You buy foods that only come in recycleable containers that would perfectly hold a tarantula. 

You (unintentionally) scare people on the city bus while you try and pose a freshly molted exuvia before it hardens too much on your way to work. 

A professor at a top state university askes you to work in his lab after he sees the pictures you take of an exuvia through his microscope that you 'borrowed'.

You are on a first name basis with the curator of the arthropod museum at said state university. And you also convince him that he needs your entire life span of a B. smithi molt record for the museum becuase it is an endangered species, you have significant provenance so it isn't illegal, and it is 'educationally important'. But you really just want to show off your hard work.


----------



## Varden (Dec 23, 2006)

P.jasonius said:


> If you own spiderman underwear, but don't like spiderman because they made his webbing come out of his wrists in the movie


You've got to admit, it would have been a heck of a lot more gross if they'd had it coming out his butt.


----------



## Spunky (Dec 23, 2006)

P.jasonius said:


> You might be an arachnophile when...
> http://adsoftheworld.com/media/print/french_aids_awareness_scorpion



OMG all of the oil on him is going to it!


----------



## SouthernStyle (Dec 23, 2006)

*The UPS guy Always asks "What did you get this time, and Can I hold it?" *

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG Story behind that one!


----------



## Tee2 (Dec 24, 2006)

when you have saved up so much money before.

Now you got into the hobby you cant even get anything for your wife on christmas because you have spent it all on inverts.


----------



## SouthernStyle (Dec 24, 2006)

*When the Post Office Constantly asks "Why are you getting so much food shipped to you" ::smirks::*


----------



## Skuikki (Dec 24, 2006)

.. When it's midwinter and you know what 6 spiders you are going to get 6 months later.


----------



## bliss (Dec 24, 2006)

here's some for you guys  :
* when you dress up as a T for halloween.
* when you hit your friend for killing a house spider
* when you get revenge on your enemy by letting OBT juveniles loose in their house   
* when your friend calls you on the phone and you answer "guess what im holding"... then they hang up on you b4 you can even answer. lol
* when you sacrifice your body heat to keep your T's warm
* when you say "i don't feel like messing with my T's right now..." and then you jump on arachnoboards!!! lol.
* WHEN YOU CAN MAKE UP MORE THAN THREE OF THESE THINGS!!!!


----------



## Stylopidae (Dec 24, 2006)

blissful88 said:


> * when your friend calls you on the phone and you answer "guess what im holding"... then they hang up on you b4 you can even answer. lol


That's actually a great way of ditching the conversation, except my answer usually doesn't involve a tarantula


----------



## bliss (Dec 24, 2006)

hmmmm. interesting... lol.  kinda funny and disturbing at the same time. remind me never to call you!  LOL, joking.


----------



## bliss (Dec 24, 2006)

nothing personal... 
  anybody think of any more???


----------



## nepenthes (Dec 25, 2006)

You're Moms boyfriend buys a T you already are gonna get for the Christmas Gift exchange , and you automatically trade the alcohol even though you're under age.


----------



## bliss (Dec 25, 2006)

*if you take the money that is supposed to be used for college funds and buy T's with it. (very guilty) 
*if you start eating crix urself (< has this one already been said??? if so, im srry!)
* if your a guy and you try to make a sperm web
* if your a female and u eat your mate
* if your baby's first word is "brachypelma" or "avicularia"
* if you have a picture of Rick West in a superman outfit on your Computer screen background
* if you ask a plastic surgeon " so, how much would 6 extra eyes cost??"
* if you get excited when your G. rosea moves 2" in 15minutes. LOL.
* if you cry because you live too far away to go to arachnocon in 2007.
* if you turn down a really hot guy/girl because your .25" N. chromatus is finally molting. 
* if you like going into pet stores and telling the people who work there "your WRONG!" whenever you hear them telling other customers about T's.
* if you keep your computer logged on to arachnoboards while you're asleep just for the heck of it (guilty guilty guilty)
* if one of your friends gets angry, and you reply "woah woah woah!!! don't go haplo on me!!"
*if your OBT latches onto your face and you continue to say "awww!! what a sweet animal!!!"
*if you call your friends at 3:30 am to tell them that your .25" N. chromatus finally molted. (guilty)
* when you squeal with delight at things with 8 appendages.

 umm.. ok, enough for tonight. geeeeeze. lol,


----------



## dragontears (Dec 26, 2006)

When you have a dream about a 3 foot G. pulchra that comes when called and jumps up on you to give you hugs and you wake up with a smile and a warm fuzzy feeling.

After telling friends about said dream, they shudder and call it a nightmare.  :wall:


----------



## Tropical T's (Dec 26, 2006)

You have people drop rescued T's off at your girlfriends work and then your girlfriend rings you to abuse you about the influence you are having on her nine year old daughter because when she picked her up she was able to identify the said T with the comment of "aww it's a little plumipes"


----------



## Lilija (Dec 26, 2006)

When your cricket guy identifies you as "the spider chick" and remands any and all spiders dropped off at his place, to your care.  Or, when he comes to you for advice about which to order, what kinds to stock in his shop, and how to keep them properly.

When you go around misting the spiderwebs in your living room.

When you're repainting your bedroom, and see a little house spider on the wall, you paint around it.  (True story, I painted a little heart around it, and moved on...my husband came home, looked, and just shook his head.)

The spiders hanging out in the corner of the bathroom have names.  

When Christmas dinner is abruptly halted, because you race to beat your nice, but misunderstood inlaw to the spider on the chandelier that he wants to moosh with a napkin.  After climbing down off the table, tell them you're just going to put it outside, but don't, because it will freeze to death.  Instead, you slip it into the guest bathroom, and run some water in the sink for it.  (Just happened, Sunday...)


----------



## -Sarah- (Dec 26, 2006)

(1) You know you're an arachnophile when: every time a local sees you at work they identify you as the town's only 'Spider-Woman' (locals include but are not necessarily limited to delivery men who also know you as the 'Spider Woman') and ask you how your critters are doing  

(2) You know you're an arachnophile when: every time you enter the post office to mail a letter you get pounced on by 3 or more postal workers asking you if you've gotten any photos of your new tarantulas (yes, the ones you took out of the same box that none of them wanted to touch after they found out what was in it.)

(3) You know you're an arachnophile when: the people at your church get a complete and total kick out of exuvia, asking about what you can feed tarantulas and asking the age-old question of... "Have you ever gotten bit!?" - or even better... "Aren't they poisonous!?"

I love this town  

-Sarah


----------



## ShadowBlade (Dec 26, 2006)

ShadowBlade said:


> When your Youth Pastor tells the local christian rock band to come to church to see you hold some of your T's and centipedes.
> 
> I was... surprised, to say the least.


Now the pastor's parents ask if I'm the 'dude with the spiders'.:? 
Flattering.........


Also, when you go into a petstore, see a mature male you've been looking for, buy it, (with the store owner chuckling at you because he knows it won't live long). And you smirk back at him, about ready to tell him off.


----------



## reptyls (Dec 26, 2006)

Your child tells the Santa at the mall that he wants a Boehmei and a Pulchra for Christmas and Santa gets a really confused look on his face.  (He is getting the Boehmei next week, by the way).


----------



## ventell (Dec 28, 2006)

To save on rising fuel costs, you take your males to be loaned out to work with you and drop them off on your way home.  You really know you have a problem when your co-workers notice your problem too.  I *never* bring a cooler to work (which held to males going out for loan) and they just had to see, until they saw, and then didn't want to see =)


----------



## Stylopidae (Jan 1, 2007)

When your drunken 2 AM phone call is to ask your friend if you closed your P. regalis tank.

When you can still pronounce pocielotheria, but you can't pronounce 'shobriety tessssp'


----------



## kitty_b (Jan 1, 2007)

when your mom calls to wish you a happy new year, and when she asks how it was you tell her about how you spent the whole night watching a spider molt.


----------



## Scorpiove (Jan 2, 2007)

When you have not one but TWO dreams about your female _G. rosea_ becoming a real woman and then becoming the love of your life.... uh excuse me now, that uh happened to a friend.


----------



## SouthernStyle (Jan 2, 2007)

When you Show up to meet the postal worker and he just gives you a blank stare with a slight shake in his head and asks "how many this time?" 

When UPS KNOWS you by first name but they commonly refer to you as "The customer who has BIG spiders"

When Your family calls just to check on how many new spiders you got this week, and what you've got planned next week

When you allot a portion of your paycheck just to buy T's and Crickets


----------



## Wolfy72 (Jan 2, 2007)

When your 5 year old son can sit tell everyone who visits, the common AND Latin names of all your spiders.


----------



## Ando55 (Jan 4, 2007)

-When this site reigns on your list as #1 in terms of time spent browsing/reading/etc. and in hits visited.

-You realize there is no such thing as learning too little or too much about Ts in general and about specific species.

-You thank everyone at the boards once they help you successfully plan preparation for your new T(s).

-You find it very amusing and worthwhile to browse the genus galleries, pick out your favorites and then browse dealer sites subtotaling the total amount to buy your favorite Ts.  

-You visit every dealer site you know everyday on the hour by the hour or even by every 30 minutes to see if they have any new T(s) and arachnids. 

-You might not want to read your college textbook about history but you'll gladly reread The Tarantula's Keeper Guide and Tarantulas and Other Arachnids eight times over for good "leisure" reading 

-You consider time watching your Ts interact, move, moult, eat, and crawl around very worthwhile and fun.  

-You consider every member on this board an automatic good friend to go if you need help caring for your Ts or if anything goes wrong; props to everyone here! 


*Thats all for now, I got classes at 9:30 but need to be up at 7 or so, I'll post more tomorrow or should I say this evening!*


----------



## Nightshade (Jan 4, 2007)

When people ask you how you can sleep at night with huge hairy spiders less than 3 feet from your bed and you respond: "Quite soundly, actually, because nobody will ever want to break into MY house."


----------



## Ando55 (Jan 4, 2007)

Latrodectus said:


> When people ask you how you can sleep at night with huge hairy spiders less than 3 feet from your bed and you respond: "Quite soundly, actually, because nobody will ever want to break into MY house."


Rofl, I like that one!


----------



## Pennywise (Jan 4, 2007)

I started this thread back in the summer of 2005 and I can't believe it's still
going. Wow!

I have a new addition

You know you are an Arachnophile when:

You have dream about giant hairy spiders crawling everywhere
and  you awaken refrehed and pleasantly relaxed.

                    Happy Webbing!  Pennywise


----------



## Mr. Mordax (Jan 4, 2007)

You have been known to commandeer your significant's computer when they weren't looking so you could log into AB (after logging them out :razz


----------



## Nightshade (Jan 22, 2007)

You know you're an arachnophile when you notice some lumps of dirt your T. blondi dragged out of the flowerpot while it was renovating after the move and you're tempted to take them out and keep them in a special place like bronzed baby shoes, so in a year or two you can look back on the cute things it did when it was little.


----------



## Stylopidae (Jan 22, 2007)

You know you're an arachnophile when you require affection for spiders as a dating requirement.


----------



## cheetah13mo (Jan 22, 2007)

*You know your an Arachnophile when:*

nobody wants to come over to your house for any kind of fuction, including family and your completely ok with it.

someone asks you how your spiders are doing and go in to an hour long detail of the complete process of molting and it's recovory.

you can sit here and come up with hundreds of reasons when you know your an arachnophile.


----------



## Selenops (Jan 23, 2007)

When you suffer instant whiplash while passing by any wall with cigarrette ash or burns on them thinking you spotted a Salti or Widow.

When you pass the ivy hedges and find yourself studying it more intensely or deeply than one should publically hoping to find a local mantid for a pet or wonderful food items like grasshoppers for your inverts back home.


----------



## Sicel1304 (Jan 23, 2007)

When you prefer calling spiders by their true Latin names instead of their common names.

When you proudly show "your little girl" to all the customers at Petco. And by "little girl" I mean a picture of your 4 inch female G. Aureostratia.


----------



## Stylopidae (Jan 25, 2007)

You know you're an arachnophile when your day is like this after missing the postman delivering an overnight package:

1.) Drive down to the post office and learn that the package delivery person isn't back yet

2.) Check in at the post office every 15 minutes until they offer to give you a call on your cellphone

3.) Check in every half hour afterwards, still listening to your Ipod in the parking lot

4.) When they finally call you, you're at the desk before they actually tell you the package is in and you feel like you have to apologize for being obsessive

5.) The woman at the post office smiles at you and says this: Actual quote, BTW



			
				 The lady at the post office said:
			
		

> You don't use the word obsessive lightly, do you?



(Special thanks to Padkisson for the M. giganteus and the A. chalcodes  )


----------



## rex_arachne (Jan 26, 2007)

you're an arachnophile when/if:

you say "good spidey/scorpy!" when you're feeding your pets and they are very alert at grabbing their prey.

you exclaim "cute scorpy/spidey!" when you see your newly acquired sling (scorps or Ts or whatever) for the first time.

you think vinegaroons are one of the most beautiful creatures on earth. lol.


----------



## JonathanF (Jan 26, 2007)

You know you're an arachnophile when you read this thread, and actually understanding everything


----------



## Ungweliante (Feb 2, 2007)

1) You want to rescue a T from a pet store because the peat moss doesn't look fresh and the T "looks unhappy". After spending more time with the T in the pet store you realise that the T "wants you to take her with you".

2) You carry the said T home between your breasts because the Finnish winter is cold and the T "is happy and warm there". During the trip you keep telling the T that it "only has to endure the vibrations of the trip home only a little while longer" and "you're sorry and you know how scary it is". When you get home you tell the T "what a brave girl she was".

3) Next night you get a dream about all your Ts telling you that they love you and hugging you, and wake up with an insanely happy grin on your face. You immediately call all your friends and family and tell them about the dream.

4) You would never, ever, not in a million years, consider a relationship with a guy who wouldn't accept your Ts.


----------



## P.jasonius (Feb 2, 2007)

You've actually read all the posts in this thread!


----------



## funnylori (Feb 3, 2007)

You just had a dream about an giant A. versicolor sling bitting you in the middle of your palm for 5 minutes and you just waited until it was done and slide it off your hand. Then in your dream you pokie sling gets out and is running all over your body, tapping your eyes, and generally staying just out of reach. So in your dream you just hold still and ask mom to hold a butter tub over it.  
Then when you wake up in the morning you check out your palm and are dissapointed there aren't any bite marks, and are relieved when a quick glance reveals that nobody escaped. -I like dreams.


----------



## jllobet (Feb 3, 2007)

your boss asks you to clean up his garage and you find an empty 5 gallon aquarium that hasn't been used in a long time while doing it. You take it to your car, hide it, and take it home on your lunch break, then you tell your boss you accidentally broke it and had to throw it away, but one of the walls was broken so it didn't really matter, and your boss believes you. (Actually happened)  

You only search for tarantula videos in youtube, and have at least one video uploaded there. 

Your relatives know that if they don't tell you they love yor Ts is as if they didn't love you either.


----------



## Mr. Mordax (Feb 4, 2007)

If Amblypygids no longer appear odd to you

If you debate leaving your day-job to just charge for tours of your apartment

If people actually ASK for tours of your apartment

If you simply can't comprehend how someone could possibly be scared of your female _P. imperator_ -- or even your cute tiny _H. paucidens_


----------



## Transylvania (Feb 4, 2007)

You're at a friend's house and at midnight you call your parents to tell them to check on your T, wondering if she ate that cricket. (Guilty)


----------



## kurisute_hasu (Feb 4, 2007)

You shop for Ts, research different species, surf arachnoboards even though the Super bowl is on.


----------



## Mr. Mordax (Feb 4, 2007)

kurisute_hasu said:


> . . . even though the Super bowl is on.


Super_what_?  I'm sorry, I was trying to ID a scorpion.


----------



## Anastasia (Feb 5, 2007)

OMG, I cant beleive I read the whole thread, LOL
got a few gigles, and smiles, and saw my self quite a few times, no bull, lol
my turn  
der is no hope fer ya when u think what kinda spiduh u wona be in yer reincarnation, lol
when u think, Awwwee she have a such cute fuzzy(hairy) butt  
when u wish u have 8 eyeballs, lol
when u wish em to grow so big dat u can ride em to work
all yer staffed toyz are spiders  
it said 'beware of spiders' on yer door, instead beware of dog  
or jes 'H.lividum on de loose'  and all yer friends know  yer have a great security system ;P 
its when u spend all day on AB and cant think of anything but T's, All tell ya worse then caffeine addiction............


----------



## rYe (Feb 5, 2007)

JonPaul said:


> Oh, or if you are infamous for "correcting" movies/TV about the portrayal of arachnids, or for giving the wrong scientific name.
> I got yelled at by some friends, watching some "b movie" about the 'Island of Tarantulas" or something like that.... The giant (don't even need to get into physics) tarantula had webbing comming out of it's face.... arrgh! (Oh and that all spiders hunt people)
> 
> JonPaul


That's what's so great about B-Movies, their info is so wrong it makes for a good laugh. Trust me I watch at least 10 B-movies (new & old) a week.



Evil Cheshire said:


> 13: Your biology proffesor wants to take a feild trip to YOUR house for class one day


I don't have anything along those lines but everybody I know who has a son wants to bring their kid(s) to my house. As far as I know I'm the only person in my entire city with a collection like mine so the running joke is my house is the city exotic zoo.


----------



## Stylopidae (Feb 5, 2007)

rYe said:


> As far as I know I'm the only person in my entire city with a collection like mine so the running joke is my house is the city exotic zoo.


When I was doing my internship for my Zoo, the busiest keepers had ~10 species to take care of.

I care for roughly 30 species of invert...thousands of individuals (if you include roaches).

I have the feeling we both do the work of a zookeeper


----------



## LimaMikeSquared (Feb 5, 2007)

i've finally reached the end of the thread hehe. Got a couple to add.


One from my mum - When you decide your going to spread your husbands ashes in the peat moss once he is cremeted - Just because he doesnt like the Ts.

And Mine - 

When you are tempted to leave the 2.5cm P.regalis on the ceiling as they look so cute there.

When you push the cricket towards the spider as the cricket is not going in the right direction.


----------



## spider_fan (Feb 5, 2007)

When you think that it would better if rappers, instead of weaing diamond studded platinum crosses for bling, wore small terreriums with a P. metallica inside on their platinum chains.


----------



## Transylvania (Feb 5, 2007)

Your favorite band is Metallica, only because it sounds like the name of your favorite T.

You'd love to have a roach infestation in your house.


----------



## Sicel1304 (Feb 8, 2007)

When the link for the "Arachnoboards" forum gets one of your coveted "Quick launch" tabs on the top of your internet browser

When you check the forums on a daily basis to see what is new.


----------



## P.jasonius (Feb 12, 2007)




----------



## my_dead_valenti (Feb 13, 2007)

Hedorah99 said:


> 14. You refuse to quit your part time, dead end job because it would mean not being able to acquire more spiders.
> 
> 
> This one is true for me, anyone else?


thats the reason im staying.
thank god someone else is doing the same. i steal containers for spiderlings.hope they dont catch on.;P


----------



## Anastasia (Feb 13, 2007)

P.jasonius said:


>


hahahaha, der is definately no hope fer me 
I got all excited to look at dis picture den
most of my dates <yawn>
Um, can I please have dat spiduh
or where can I get one jes like it


----------



## funnylori (Feb 16, 2007)

You realize you haven't shaved your legs in eight weeks because you like the way the hairs pick up the vibrations in the room and enhance your 'spidey senses'. You realize this is after you go out on a nice date with your fiance to an expensive resturant, and you contimplated wearing knee high striped socks with your dress because you didn't want people laughing at you in public.


----------



## Selenops (Feb 17, 2007)

funnylori said:


> You realize you haven't shaved your legs in eight weeks because you like the way the hairs pick up the vibrations in the room and enhance your 'spidey senses'. You realize this is after you go out on a nice date with your fiance to an expensive resturant, and you contimplated wearing knee high striped socks with your dress because you didn't want people laughing at you in public.


When hairy gfs are a prerequisite to a happier relationship. Ew, gross parallel! The hairier the merrier!


----------



## Ungweliante (Feb 17, 2007)

Anastasia said:


> hahahaha, der is definately no hope fer me
> I got all excited to look at dis picture den
> most of my dates <yawn>
> Um, can I please have dat spiduh
> or where can I get one jes like it


You too, eh?


----------



## Selenops (Feb 17, 2007)

Uh-oh, this thread is quickly going down the burrow er gutter. Boy, what I wouldn't do to have eight legs and plush skin right about now.

;P


----------



## fartkowski (Mar 11, 2007)

you're always checking the discovery channel in hopes of getting even a glimpse of a spider

you get bit, and your first reaction is to post it in the bite reports

when you record all the molt dates

when none of the tupperware containers have lids cause you are using them for water dishes

when you have a list handy of all the species you want

when you move furnatue around because you may be able to squeeze another bookshelf in for more cages

when you buy water dishes, hides, containers for sizes of T's you do not yet own

when you played for a hockey team named the spiders

when your mouse pointer is a spider

you'll buy anything that has a spider on it

you babytalk to your T's when nobody is around

when you can easily think of something to write in this thread

when your friends have dreams about your spiders

when you go to the pet store to buy 3 medium crickets because your juvie b.smithi may not be ready to handle a large one yet

everytime you see a ruler you have to point out to someone that your blondi may grow to be this big


----------



## DFW Tfan (Mar 11, 2007)

fartkowski said:


> you babytalk to your T's when nobody is around



You babytalk to your Ts when people ARE around!


----------



## fartkowski (Mar 11, 2007)

you can't figure out how to use the microwave but you can build cages and incubaters and raise slings fresh from the sack


----------



## Jonathan Rice (Mar 11, 2007)

You Know You Are An Arachnophile When:

-You call in sick to work to watch you t molt

-You spend half your paychecks on t's 

-Part of you morning routine includes watching you t's for 5 minutes

-The first thing you do when you get home is check on your t's, while it should be closing and locking the door

-Your t's use more electricity than you (electric heater)


----------



## davidmmx (Mar 11, 2007)

P.jasonius said:


>


LOL, that's a good one (I mean, that's a good sized tarantula). I have other aids ad with a scorpion, but I'm not sure if I can post it here because it's a bit more explicit (you know, it has a big sting) so :8o  I don't dare to post it.


----------



## Dilbrain (Mar 11, 2007)

Anastasia said:


> hahahaha, der is definately no hope fer me
> I got all excited to look at dis picture den
> most of my dates <yawn>
> Um, can I please have dat spiduh
> or where can I get one jes like it



I'll bring my costume......:drool:


----------



## funnylori (Mar 11, 2007)

Jonathan Rice said:


> You Know You Are An Arachnophile When:
> 
> -You call in sick to work to watch you t molt
> 
> ...


Every bit of this is true for me! Especially the electricity part. It got really cold in my house this year, weather proofing my room just wasnt enough... Mom made me pay half of the electric bill one time cause it got a little out of hand... :8o 

And to stay OT: You know you are an arachnophile when you and your fiance refer to them as your 'kids'.


----------



## Mr. Mordax (Mar 11, 2007)

Was there anything on here about calling your SO at 4:00 in the morning to report a sling molting and regaining a lost leg? :razz:


----------



## funnylori (Mar 12, 2007)

Technically, with the DST and all, it was 5 am!


----------



## Greyhalo (Mar 12, 2007)

You know your an Arachnophile when:

You spend more time reading and learning about Ts then you do studying for what your currently going to school for.

You spend half the day collecting all the loose change in your house so you can buy another T.


----------



## thunderthief (Mar 12, 2007)

You know your an Arachnophile when:

You've just bought 2 T's and the first thing you do is look for what T you'll buy next.


----------



## Vaul (Mar 12, 2007)

(As happened to me)

Walking through uni with people avoiding me, checking my hair, face incase I have something weird on me and finding nothing. It not even occuring in my thoughts could be something to do with the scorpions I was taking to a friend, until a girl says "Did you see that...he had _scorpions_ in that box."


----------



## Varden (Mar 13, 2007)

IHeartMantids said:


> If people actually ASK for tours of your apartment



I actually had three neighborhood kids knock on my door the other day and ask if I really had spiders and could they see them.  One of them positively freaked when she saw some of the moms with their eggsacs.  A few hours later she was back at my house with a little tuperware container full of all the spider eggsacs she could find in her house.  

How about, you know you're an arachnophile when you accept such a gift and then leave them sitting on the counter for several days because while you don't necessarily want to keep them, it's much too cold outside to toss them out without killing them.


----------



## Stylopidae (Mar 15, 2007)

Varden said:


> I actually had three neighborhood kids knock on my door the other day and ask if I really had spiders and could they see them.  One of them positively freaked when she saw some of the moms with their eggsacs.  A few hours later she was back at my house with a little tuperware container full of all the spider eggsacs she could find in her house.
> 
> How about, you know you're an arachnophile when you accept such a gift and then leave them sitting on the counter for several days because while you don't necessarily want to keep them, it's much too cold outside to toss them out without killing them.



Varden...you _are_ arachnophile


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## Tropical T's (Mar 16, 2007)

When you don't care that people are looking at you strangely because you are carrying a jar around a shopping centre. In said jar was a large tarantula you had just rescued from a local vet surgery that rings you when people bring them in and you didn't want to leave it in the hot car.
Also you laugh at the people that walk into things as they are too busy staring at the spider. Not sure if that is a common thing to arachnophiles or I am just a sadist.


----------



## Stylopidae (Feb 4, 2008)

Wow...has it really been that long since this thread was up?

You know you're an arachnophile when you refer to a date at a resturant neither of you are familiar with as a 'neutral ground mating attempt'.


----------



## Mr. Mordax (Feb 4, 2008)

You know you're an arachnophile when you refer to your apartment as the burrow.

When you secretly wish that you fluoresced, too.

When you think it would be fun to ecdyse.

When you wonder why people act surprised to find that you have three scorpions, a black widow, and a giant cockroach in your backpack.


----------



## kitty_b (Feb 4, 2008)

your sister in law's 3 year old thinks you run a zoo


----------



## syndicate (Feb 4, 2008)

IHeartMantids said:


> You know you're an arachnophile when you refer to your apartment as the burrow.


haha


----------



## Talkenlate04 (Feb 4, 2008)

You know your an arachnophile when you come home from work, walk in the door, then walk right past the girlfriend or wife, and go straight to the T room to see what's new.


----------



## syndicate (Feb 4, 2008)

dunno if someone posted this one yet but

You know your an arachnophile when
your spiders get more action than you do!
sadly im guilty of this haha :wall:


----------



## Truff135 (Feb 4, 2008)

...when you won't get frisky until your SO drums first...


----------



## Tunedbeat (Feb 5, 2008)

*You know your an Arachnophile when:*

You wake up in the morning, the first thing you do is check up on all your Ts. 

You've consider upgrading your camera and purchasing a macro lens, just to photograph your collection.  

You visit the For Sale thread more than 5 times a day. 

;P


----------



## melanie5 (Feb 5, 2008)

Love this thread

You know when you're an Aracnophile when:

Your mom (former total aracnophobe) checks ads on the net for you and asks you when you'll buy that nice pink one, cause it would go so well with her new pink curtains

Your mom helps you get a 2 inch Pokie out of your sleeve when it escaped during rehousing and you're both only worried if the T's allright

Your brother spots something blue and tiny on the ceiling and knows which one it is AND in which container it goes

When even your grandmother knows the pet names of your T's

When you've just ordered a bunch a T's and are allready deciding on what to get next

Your mom had adjusted her grocery list so you can feed the leftovers to your crix and roaches

You don't get startled a night when something's crawling on your face, you just hope it doesn't get hurt


And like everyone else here, when you see t enclousures in every plastic container you come across


----------



## Aarantula (Feb 5, 2008)

*You no longer have any Tupperware containers in your kitchen because you've drilled air holes in all of them!*


----------



## funnylori (Feb 7, 2008)

When nobody minds that you just revived the best old thread. 

When you sell your soul to get that grail T.


----------



## Truff135 (Feb 7, 2008)

...where you once despised cockroaches, and you now make sure they are living comfortably in your home...


----------



## brglss (Feb 8, 2008)

you know your an arachnophile when you wake up to see your T eating a cricket and the first words out of your mouth are "how cute"


----------



## Drachenjager (Feb 8, 2008)

If you have ever given your wife an Avicularia versicolor sling for valentines day...you might be an arachnophile...


----------



## JayzunBoget (Feb 8, 2008)

... when it's a good thing when your pets shed!


----------



## petshopguy (May 6, 2008)

When your decision of whether or not to buy an invert depends on the odds that Federal employees might show up at your front door. 

When www.arachnoboards.com is the top website on your scroll-down menu. 

When you take a laptop with wireless internet with you to Arachnocon, “just in case a great deal shows up on the For Sale thread.”

When you find yourself staring at a T and your mind starts going – “Molt! Molt! Molt! Molt!…”

You mourned the announcement that BotarX8 was sold. 

When you feel a sense of accomplishment the first time that your OBT sling made an aggressive lunge at you. 

You made a list of critter species you can expect to find in the state that you will spend your next vacation. 

You know that the T that just got loose can survive on the crickets and roaches that occasionally get loose, and you have some comfort that you’ll prob find him one day, even though he’ll be 2-3 times bigger.

When you’ve had nightmares of your package falling off a shelf inside the UPS/Fedex truck. 

You can have an hour-long conversation on the differences between The Tarantula Keeper’s Record v2.1 and v2.2. 

You know what “sp.” means. 

You wish you lived further south. 

You correct people who say that tarantulas are poisonous. 

You tell yourself that if shipping is going to cost THAT much, it would be more fiscally responsible to add another T or two. 

You can take a two-week vacation without worrying about your pets starving. 

When you notice that it is hotter than 80F outside and you start stressing about how hot the delivery truck might be. 

You have stuffed cotton balls into the abdomen of a T’s molt. 

Most of your mail comes with freebies. 

You suffer from garage-sale whiplash during the summer, cause the world is full of people who owned a hamster for about 2-3 weeks, and you just can’t pass up a deal for a $3 10 gallon aquarium (with lid – yeah baby!) 

You love fellow AB’ers for the helpful tips, but despise them for beating  you to a great deal in the For Sale thread. 

You're envious of our European brothers, because their import regulations are much more laxed. 

You've wondered -"What's the worst that could happen if I get caught smuggling one of these on a plane."


----------



## unitard311 (May 6, 2008)

When most of your conversations begin "did you know that tarantulas...."

When you watch your T's enclosures more than you watch tv

When you purposely get up many times a night to see if your OBT came out of its burrow

When you cheer your T's on as they hunt

When you close your eyes all you can see are the latin names of T's

When you view the photo thread and take pictures with your camera phone and show them to others

When you rescue a wild T from a friend's party before its smashed with a rock

When you tell your boss you are going to be late cause your T is molting


----------



## Truff135 (May 6, 2008)

petshopguy said:


> You mourned the announcement that BotarX8 was sold.


Yes, but Ken is a great guy and I'm glad to see Botar's go to someone like him!



petshopguy said:


> When you feel a sense of accomplishment the first time that your OBT sling made an aggressive lunge at you.


And you find it endearing that your little avic darling just shot you with poo.



petshopguy said:


> You correct people who say that tarantulas are poisonous.


Can't tell you how many times I've done this...



petshopguy said:


> You can take a two-week vacation without worrying about your pets starving.


And on a similar note, you don't have to feel irresponsible if you haven't cleaned its tank in a few months... 



petshopguy said:


> You love fellow AB’ers for the helpful tips, but despise them for beating  you to a great deal in the For Sale thread.


All's fair in love and war, my friend.


----------



## unitard311 (May 6, 2008)

When your non-T loving friends start telling you they are having dreams about spiders after hanging out with you


----------



## Drachenjager (May 6, 2008)

petshopguy said:


> You wish you lived further south.


UMM i wish that when the Temp gets below 65 F lol


----------



## jen650s (May 6, 2008)

When your rosie juvie stands up in a threat posture when you are trying to remove the roach she didn't eat and you burst into laughter because it is just so cute.

When you meet the daughter you gave up for adoption 21 years ago and find that her adoptive mother has never been able to handle the fact that she has a thing and always has had a thing for...ugh bugs   .  And, the very first thing the daughter asks when she hears about all the Ts is when can I meet them :clap: .


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## jshadowstalker (May 6, 2008)

when family members bring there children and there friends kids to your house, to see there uncles insect ZOO. lol wish they would give me donations like zoo's get =)


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## Sr. Chencho (May 8, 2008)

When you want to buy new Ts from the For Sale AB section, and your wife wants another one for her, one of every specie.

When the wifie, that got seriously bitten in Arachnocon07, calls you at work and directs you to a certain page in AB where there's an ad of Ts that she wants and says, "It's a good deal, buy it for me".  

When you come home from work at 2 am and her laptop screen is on AB. 

When you're at home reading discussions on AB on your destop, and your wife, who is four feet away, is on her laptop also on AB. 

Poor thing, somebody help her! Send an antidote, *PLEASE!!*

Fredster


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## saminthemiddle (May 8, 2008)

T 'n T said:


> During the company's annual white elephant gift exchange, you excitedly choose the huge black plastic spider everyone else eyes with revulsion. :}
> 
> When you accidentally squeeze it, hear a squeak and realize with delight that it stridulates!
> 
> ...


You feel ripped off; new world spiders aren't supposed to stridulate!


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## petshopguy (May 9, 2008)

Send an antidote? Send me her sister!!!!!!!


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## Aurelia (May 9, 2008)

You know you're an arachnophile when you have dreams of getting more Ts right at the time you don't have any money left and the Ts in your dreams are big, beautiful, and rare.


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## Nightshade (May 9, 2008)

When large roaches make you happy.

When you end up on a dealer's website every time you log in to AB, to see if they still have the species you would buy if you weren't broke.

When you find yourself talking to your Ts when you're home alone with them.

When your boyfriend wants to send you to an expensive spa and you tell him to buy you a spider.


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## Talkenlate04 (May 10, 2008)

When you post on this thread almost 3 YEARS after it was started!!!!!


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## Oasis Inverts (May 10, 2008)

You Know You Are An Arachnophile When:


Your tarantulas home is cleaner than yours....


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## Nightshade (May 10, 2008)

Oasis Inverts said:


> You Know You Are An Arachnophile When:
> 
> 
> Your tarantulas home is cleaner than yours....


Or, your tarantulas have more food in the pantry than you do.
(The groceries can wait another day, but the hungry Ts can't.)


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## AmyLu1982 (May 10, 2008)

These all have to do with the computer...

When your internet auto populates things like "tarantula" and "tank" on Craigslist and "Grammostola Rosea" on Google.

Your internet Quick Launch has the following: Arachnoboards; Spiders.com; crickets.com; and a whole folder "T" which is full of care sheets.

The only "sex" site book marked is one on how to sex your G. Rosea.

Your baby is on the computer desk, where you can watch her all day.

You stop using your computer after sunset because it might upset your baby.

Your boss shudders when he sees your desktop background, while you fire back... "She's molted, and bigger since that one was taken!"

You break off of typing your list for 20 min to watch your new G. Rosea munch a cricket!!!   


a few others:

You buy lockable terrariums so your mom can visit.

Your co-workers call you over the intercom to rescue a spider from the ladies room, lest they face your wrath for squishing it.

Your best friend calls to describe the scary looking beast in her kitchen and you don't tell her its a jumper, but drive 30 min to "save" it.

You come home and pronounce happily "Good News!" and everyone runs away...

Your 5 year old daughter wants her own Pink Toe...

You're considering her request seriously.

Forget potato chips:  You can't just have one T!

You consider your boyfriend a 10+ because he didn't object to the big hairy invert in the bedroom... or the next 5 after the first...

Your job requires you to mix up mortar and you make "extra" and to create hides and water dishes, then "smuggle" them home.

You just don't get Indiana Jones... Whats so scary about a couple big hairy spiders?  But you watch it anyway and try to identify them.

The "big scary spider" on Emperor's New Groove gets a thumbs up from your 5 year old.

People look at you in horror when you tell them about your "beautiful babies."


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## AmyLu1982 (May 11, 2008)

missed one:

you remove all the music off your "myspace" lest it disturb your baby.  You start encouraging your friends to follow suit...


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## Aurelia (May 12, 2008)

When you yell at your other pets for disturbing your spiders.


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## Brianhogs (May 12, 2008)

Guilty!


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## Aurelia (May 12, 2008)

Earlier I had my budgies out and one of them was jumping around on top of my spiders' cages. Boy did he get a talkin' to! I put him on a guilt trip for scaring Kumo and I told him that she could eat him if she wanted to.


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## TalonArana (May 19, 2008)

Cheshire said:


> When you buy the pre-packaged crix just because you get a free container, even though you know they're more expensive than normal crix.


Lol omg XD I've done that XD


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## Eclipse (May 19, 2008)

Pennywise said:


> 8.    You begin to think that T. Blondi is someone you would like to spend some time with.


Hahaha! It does kinda sound like the name a basketball player would have.


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## fishwithoutabik (May 19, 2008)

When your digital camera which holds 500 pictures has one of each of your human children and 497 of your tarantulas.

When your family is eating healthier so you can have more nutritious scraps to feed your crix/roaches and thus your Ts. 

When you don't mind that your bedroom smells like "dirt" b/c of all the Ts and substrate sitting around.

When you meet the most perfect dating prospect ever but turn them down because they don't like spiders. 

When you stop thinking of your cat as "Fluffy" and start thinking of him as "that mammal that costs 5 new tarantulas worth of money a month to maintain"

When you start calling dogs/cats/rats/etc just "mammals" 

When you spend your lunch hour outside obsessively hunting and rehoming spiders at your workplace so they don't get squished by the "spider haters"


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## fishwithoutabik (May 19, 2008)

When you think the hottest person on earth is that guy/girl who knows practically everything about inverts:worship:


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## Nightshade (May 20, 2008)

When you take the stairs in your building and you have to pause for a few seconds at each floor to look in the corners for your stairwell buddies.

Now that the mosquitoes are back, hopefully the spiders will reappear soon


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## Bosing (May 21, 2008)

When you have a photo of your T as your mobile phone wallpaper.

When you would rather sit and stare at your creepy crawlers and let your parents entertain your guests!

When you wait for that wonderful day they call "payday" and allocate a huge portion of it to complete your never-gonna-be-complete T wishlist.

When the entire neighborhood knows you're into Ts.

When you let the househelp take care of your other pets because you are busy cleaning, rehousing, feeding, staring, photographing your Ts.

When you become paranoid of the ant marches, just to see if they are walking in a direction close to where your terrariums are.

When you log on to this site DAILY!!!


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## presurcukr (May 21, 2008)

when you spend your entire econimic stimulas check on t's:clap:


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## ninja250 (May 21, 2008)

when the neighbors are afraid to come into your house because of the manner of pets that you have


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## Stuart C (May 22, 2008)

Bosing said:


> When you log on to this site DAILY!!!


when you log onto this site and never log out


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## troglodyte (Jun 11, 2008)

Your boss lets you go early so you can sign for a shipment.

When your idea of a practical joke is taking a molt to work and putting it in a high-traffic drawer.

Your entire kitchen counter is covered with various containers filled with Eco-Earth, and when your boyfriend pleads with you to clean it up you tell him, "I can't, I have to see which one dries the most by the time my shipment comes in!!" 

Your parents harrass the Carvel Ice Cream Cake designers into putting an ANATOMICALLY CORRECT tarantula on your birthday cake instead of flowers. "And you better make SURE it has 8 legs and 2 pedipalps or she'll be angry!"


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## johnharper (Jul 2, 2008)

*You know your a tarantula addict when lol*

You have been almost late to work cause your online researching tarantulas . 
You order alot of roaches but somehow still need more roaches.
Tarantulas are all you talk about. Well I guess I am addict but I love the hobby.

John


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## xhexdx (Jul 2, 2008)

http://www.arachnoboards.com/ab/showthread.php?t=97918&highlight=addict


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## reverendsterlin (Jul 2, 2008)

you forgot to mention when while your grocery shopping you sometimes buy unexpected foods because the container would make a great T enclosure

Rev


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## xchondrox (Jul 2, 2008)

You start scrappin' metal to support your T habit.


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## scar is my t (Jul 2, 2008)

u lost ur house and live outside and your t's are in a shed that you bought..........


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## wsimms (Jul 2, 2008)

-You have to sleep in your yard because the T's have filled up the house.
-The first T on today's feeding list has molted twice before you feed the last one on the list.
-You realize that your children have graduated from high school, gotten married, and started a family and you didn't have time to notice.


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## Thompson08 (Jul 2, 2008)

reverendsterlin said:


> you forgot to mention when while your grocery shopping you sometimes buy unexpected foods because the container would make a great T enclosure
> 
> Rev


hahahah right!  When I'm at my grandma and grandpa's house I see little deli cups all over the place that is good for spiderlings. Oh and I hate when I cannot get another T


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## kyrga (Jul 2, 2008)

johnharper said:


> You have been almost late to work cause your online researching tarantulas .


_Almost _late? Then you're _almost _an addict! ;P ;P ;P


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## deathfingers66 (Jul 2, 2008)

Tarantulas went from my biggest fear to my biggest passion.Started with a rosie 
watched it for hours at a time.I said I wouldn't get this species or that species,now I got those and more.I said my collection would never go above 10,then 10 became 25,and 25 became 50,and now I have well over 200.My rainbow Boa is going to get sold to make room for more,my collection is growing on the ground.I dream ,eat and sleep tarantulas.I said I would never start a roach colony,now i have one(so much better then damm crickets, but crickets are still on the menu cuz they love them and I love to see them bite the dust...lol).


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## hardlucktattoo (Jul 2, 2008)

You know your addicted when you sell your stuff so you can but more Ts


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## kingpin1189 (Jul 2, 2008)

How about when:

You almost ditch your last year of graduate studies to be a marriage and family therapist because you seriously contemplated starting over to become an entomologist to spend more time with spiders!!


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## sarraceniashawn (Jul 2, 2008)

When you spend more money on things for Ts then for yourself.


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## MVDaniel (Jul 2, 2008)

When your heating bill is 800 bucks a month trying to maintain 75F at all times.


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## Remigius (Jul 2, 2008)

when You always remember to keep Your cellphone away from the T shelf. Who knows how those waves could affect them?! It doesn't bother You to sleep next to it, though.


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## gbbgirl (Jul 2, 2008)

True dat'

You know you're addicted to t's when you spend more time decorating their tanks than your own house.


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## Kid Dragon (Jul 2, 2008)

The arachnoboard website is down, and you go through withdrawal.


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## kingpin1189 (Jul 2, 2008)

and when you get your weather report by looking at your terrestrials the night before


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## JTC5150 (Jul 2, 2008)

How 'bout when you want to kick the "snot"out of the guy who kills spiders in front of you just to f,sorry,piss you off?:wall:


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## crpy (Jul 2, 2008)

MizM said:


> Here's on for the arachnogirls. I just did this not 1/2 hour ago:
> 
> You drive home with a deli cup containing a H. lividum between your legs under your skirt so the direct sunlight won't hit it.



Damn, I hope you put it back in the sun to cool off


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