# Should I handle my sling?



## Mhairi Sneddon (Mar 20, 2015)

Hi everyone, I am relatively new to the hobby. I bought a B.Smithi spiderling 5 weeks ago which is just 1cm in length and I maintained I wouldn't handle it until it was older. I have however taken it out once and it seemed really nervous and ran quite fast. I just wanted some opinions on handling slings, should I or shouldn't I? I don't want to make a habbit out of it anyway but it would be good to know other peoples personal opinions/experiences
Thanks in advance guys:biggrin:.


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## GG80 (Mar 20, 2015)

IMO a big fat NO. They get very stressed at that small size and move VERY fast as you said yourself. They are also very delicate and although I am sure you would take care and not intentionally hurt the sling, they are very unpredictable and you could cause harm to the little guy.
I'm sure there will be mixed opinions as there always is with the subject of handling, and I am sure that there are people who do handle slings. I'm not one to judge people on how they keep their pets, I'm just giving you my opinion.

Oh, and welcome to the hobby. You will find most, if not all members here will be more than willing to give you helpful advice along your journey.

Reactions: Like 4


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## Mhairi Sneddon (Mar 20, 2015)

Thank you GG80 just what I thought I will be sure not to attempt to handle him again until he is a lot bigger  and thank you for your kind welcome


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## HungryGhost (Mar 20, 2015)

No. Do not handle a tarantula at any size. That's what they make guinea pigs for.

Reactions: Like 6


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

No... just no, don't.. not even when he's bigger, they are not toys, see it as fish in a tank, they are more for display purposes, not cuddling like you would a cat.. leave it be, they see you as a predator/intruder, everytime they get picked up they get stressed out.. and this is where bite reports come from, majority of bites happens due to handling.. even if it's bigger, if it falls you have a T with a ruptured abdomen - and this is death sentence to the T. The only one benefiting from handling is you, the T ends up with stress.. so just leave it be and enjoy its beauty with your eyes and not your hands.. also use tongs, they might mistake fingers for food

Reactions: Like 1


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## BobGrill (Mar 20, 2015)

They're not really good for handling. If you want something you can handle,  I suggest getting a kitten, puppy, hamster, gerbil, rat, guinea pig, rabbit, or a certain type of lizard that tolerates being handled,  such as a bearded dragon. Tarantulas don't like to be held, and even the most docile specimens will let you know this.

Reactions: Like 4


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## Mhairi Sneddon (Mar 20, 2015)

:/ ok. Sorry I asked. I clearly don't want a kitten or a gerbil I like Ts. And I was only askin for advice not to be shot down in flames!

Reactions: Like 1


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## Ellenantula (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> :/ ok. Sorry I asked. I clearly don't want a kitten or a gerbil I like Ts. And I was only askin for advice not to be shot down in flames!


Please don't be sorry.  I am very against handling....now.  But I bought my first T for the absolute and sole purpose of handling her.  I was lucky.  Better, she was lucky.  I totally relate to the desire to hold a T -- especially since I got into this hobby a year ago to overcome arachnophobia and holding my T helped tremendously in meeting that goal.

But yeah, it's a bad idea all around.  I realize you can overcome the fear without holding one now.
Welcome to the forums -- mostly a good bunch here -- even if a few come off blunt it's because of their love and dedication to the hobby -- so, yannoe, good intentions.

Reactions: Like 2


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## pyro fiend (Mar 20, 2015)

Sorry sneddon a simple search would have shown you nearly none of us handle...and thise that do usually dont comment because they already have been burned onthis topic... Iv always told kids who want exotics, almost all of them are for display only it literally is like a fish tank.. Some tolorate being touched i have a few that nibble my fingers or rub against me as i place inthe snails food dish.. But i dont put them in a bowl and take them on a walk... Sure ur T may seem to tilorate it.. But it doesnt mean it likes it.. Its not a cat or dog it doesnt come to you asking to have its head pet, its an exotic animal trying to live the happiest it can in a tuperwear container...

Reactions: Like 1


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## Mhairi Sneddon (Mar 20, 2015)

Thanks for the tips. I dont have arachnophobia I always liked all kinds of insect ever since i remember. But i think im just going to delete my account. I am nice to everyone I dont see the point in being blunt with people.


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## Ellenantula (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Thanks for the tips. I dont have arachnophobia I always liked all kinds of insect ever since i remember. But i think im just going to delete my account. I am nice to everyone I dont see the point in being blunt with people.


Nah, stick around!  First impressions here are nearly always wrong.  Some of the people I had some fairly choice words for (in my mind -- didn't write them!) are the very people I turn to now when I have a question about something!

It's that newbies generally don't understand the search functions (I didn't anyway) and people hear the same things over and over -- but they are not a bad bunch.  And one day, if something weird or strange happens in your sling keeping -- you will be glad to receive some excellent assistance here.

Reactions: Like 1


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## walshs2 (Mar 20, 2015)

Don't worry Sneddon, you're perfectly right to ask this question, so don't feel bad about the people shooting you down. Some of these people don't remember when they were new to the hobby. So just relax, things will work.

Reactions: Like 2


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Thanks for the tips. I dont have arachnophobia I always liked all kinds of insect ever since i remember. But i think im just going to delete my account. I am nice to everyone I dont see the point in being blunt with people.


Nobody shot you down or flamed you or anything, you asked a question and we answered, straight forward.. that's how things are around here, we are being serious and honest, not mean or rude.. all we want is the advice given be taken seriously, so take the advice to heart.. I promise you I know the feeling, I have been in your shoes and I decided to stick around and learned SOOOO much I would've never have learned elsewhere, so don't take it as people are being rude, we just gave our honest opinions, and the reasons as to why.. we are trying to help you, so please don't take it personally, you did nothing for people to hate you or whatever.. all I ask is to take T keeping seriously, never ever as a joke or handle them as toys, I know you can do it! Anyone can, I did.   I know some can come off harsh or rude but they have the best intentions, for you, your T and the hobby.. I mean you want to take care of it properly right? This is the best place for advice, believe me.



---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 08:12 PM ----------




walshs2 said:


> Don't worry Sneddon, you're perfectly right to ask this question, so don't feel bad about the people shooting you down. Some of these people don't remember when they were new to the hobby. So just relax, things will work.


That's just the thing, nobody was shooting him/her down, we were being honest and straight forward and serious, not rude and mean and this is a problem that most of us have is our advice/comments/opinions being taken as harsh, rude, personally or whatever you want to name it when it actually was straight forward advice.. being rude would sound like "holding your T is really stupid".. you know?

Reactions: Like 4


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## IHeartTs (Mar 20, 2015)

Stick around. You won't regret it. You'll see. But slings are just so tiny and fragile. They're harder to get out, harder to put back, and harder to catch if it bolts. I'm being redundant, I know. It's safer for the little guy if you don't or at least wait. I wouldn't wanna touch a brachy just because they loke to kick hairs and from someone who's been haired by many species, it ain't fun. Like at all. Congrats on the new T!

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## Mhairi Sneddon (Mar 20, 2015)

I dont think i gave the impression that i treat them as a joke or as toys. I love my little sling very much and only want the best which is why I asked but apparently you're not allowed to create new questions...will use the search bar from now and and keep out of discussions.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Ellenantula (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> I dont think i gave the impression that i treat them as a joke or as toys. I love my little sling very much and only want the best which is why I asked but apparently you're not allowed to create new questions...will use the search bar from now and and keep out of discussions.


Well, thicker skin may be needed.
Remember, you cannot change other people, you will beat your head on a wall trying; you only have control over how you react.
Only you know how much you value a SIG/forum vs how easily hurt or irritated you will become.

Reactions: Like 4


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> I dont think i gave the impression that i treat them as a joke or as toys. I love my little sling very much and only want the best which is why I asked but apparently you're not allowed to create new questions...will use the search bar from now and and keep out of discussions.


You really should grow a thicker skin, and not take everything personally, just serious, and it's good if you have the best intentions for your Ts, just chill out, you came here for advice and you got it, I personally don't mind giving advice and refer to the search function if you need more questions answered.. so please don't take any advice given as mean, I know majority of the members that posted here and none where being mean or rude, just honest

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## Tim Benzedrine (Mar 20, 2015)

I wouldn't run off. The responses you received were actually very mild. Hint:" Try "Am I ready for an OBT?" if ya REALLY want a trial by fire.  On second thought, just take my word for it. 

Seriously, though, you can't really judge reactions by text in a lot of cases.  It can appear to be more harsh than intended. Most of the time, anyway.  The comparison with guinea pigs, fish etc, are just the usual response to help make a point. Most believe that tarantulas are display creatures only and advise accordingly. There is too often the potential for disaster. Finding an escaped sling can be an exercise in futility. even an adult spider can be quite difficult to locate. And really, an escape is the best-case scenario, at least the spider has a shot at surviving and being located. But an injured spider is often an ex-spider before it is over. Given time, you'll probably make similar observation on one matter or another.

I will take the stand that the "Do a search!" thing can be a little grating. I cringe sometimes when I see it. Personally, if I have the time to browse the boards, I have the time to answer a question for the nth time. Or simply not bother to answer. No offense to any search Nazis, of course. But the way I figure personally, it is better to just sigh inwardly and give the short answer and then as an aside, mention that a search will reveal many interesting points a view that haven't been covered in the current thread. I think it is intimidating to be ordered to use a function. but that's just me, I'm a real sweetie.   The only truly legitimate reason for recommending a search is that new threads do drive other threads lower into the void, but really the traffic here isn't quite that rapid fire, it usually takes a day at least to drive something all of the way off the front page. And I usually go back a page if it seems that there may be something I may have missed.

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 02:52 PM ----------

And again, preview is my friend. I must remember that!

Reactions: Like 4


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## Ellenantula (Mar 20, 2015)

Tim Benzedrine said:


> I wouldn't run off.


Yet, anyway.   lol
I keep thinking of our more (beloved and endeared) uh, BLUNT members -- who haven't even posted here yet.

I keep thinking OP may not be ready for second shift and third shift posters.:laugh:

Reactions: Like 1


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

Ellenantula said:


> Yet, anyway.   lol
> I keep thinking of our more (beloved and endeared) uh, BLUNT members -- who haven't even posted here yet.
> 
> I keep thinking OP may not be ready for second shift and third shift posters.:laugh:


That could end up in a nasty business lol!


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## Ellenantula (Mar 20, 2015)

Tim Benzedrine said:


> And again, preview is my friend. I must remember that!


Didja fix FireFox?  I use Linux with Opera browser, but at work it's all Microsoft, so I use Firefox -- how can I document my clients home visits when the service narrative is running off 2 miles to the right?
Google "older version Firefox, you can uninstall and reinstall the previous version again.  And go in settings for "no updates, no reminders"

Back to topic:  Don't hold slings, don't let people run you off. Good forum, good people, ad nauseum.  (there, thread saved)


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## Mhairi Sneddon (Mar 20, 2015)

Thank you Tim. I will take all your points on board  I just thought people were being sarcastic with the kitten thing and I wasn't expecting it.


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## pyro fiend (Mar 20, 2015)

Ok bro noone was calling you names.. Noone said your using your T to be cool. nor waisting our time posting these, and those that think it are not here because u got your answer they left the post... 

Now as these lovely ladies already said you realy do need thicker skin.. This is THE INTERNET there are a-holes.. If anyone of the real ones where here Youd know.. Trust me.. Sure were being strait forward and maybe a little blunt but this is group of animal lovers who see it as an animals life in question... 

We only bring up the search function as it would give you YEARS of posts on this topic. Sometimes meaning the differance in how you see it.. Lal for example used to handle her T and she now sees why we dont, and sure she could have said "screw u ill do wat i want" she took note weighed both sides and made a choice... 

And again we arnt burning you.. If we was dont you think wed of said something along the lines of "you bought a delicate sling and obviously didnt do enough research before buying it" because your asking this question.. We dont see it that way..i think i canspeak for most of us when i say 'we are glad you asked and didnt threaten the life of your T every day for your own amusement'... Now im done being the donkey you have your answers have fun


Aand this tyoe up took to long (20ish mins was trying to he as nice as can yet stern.. Hard combo for me lol) XD oh well im leaving it..

Reactions: Like 1


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Thank you Tim. I will take all your points on board  I just thought people were being sarcastic with the kitten thing and I wasn't expecting it.


Nope, like Tim said, just to get the point across, congrats on your new little T, and enjoy it, and welcome to the hobby!

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 09:12 PM ----------




pyro fiend said:


> Ok bro noone was calling you names.. Noone said your using your T to be cool. nor waisting our time posting these, and those that think it are not here because u got your answer they left the post...
> 
> Now as these lovely ladies already said you realy do need thicker skin.. This is THE INTERNET there are a-holes.. If anyone of the real ones where here Youd know.. Trust me.. Sure were being strait forward and maybe a little blunt but this is group of animal lovers who see it as an animals life in question...
> 
> ...


"Lovely ladies" hehehe, you heard that ellenantula? Yep I used to handle, I posted about it and got flamed, if you think this was rude you should've seen the comments I received, but I made a choice, never handled again and stayed on the forums.. and I'm glad I did

Reactions: Like 2


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## IHeartTs (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Thank you Tim. I will take all your points on board  I just thought people were being sarcastic with the kitten thing and I wasn't expecting it.


There's lot of sarcasm here. 97% of it is playful. I wish some of our old threads gone weird were easily accessible, you'd see the good humor many of us have 

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 02:19 PM ----------




Tim Benzedrine said:


> I wouldn't run off. The responses you received were actually very mild. Hint:" Try "Am I ready for an OBT?" if ya REALLY want a trial by fire.  On second thought, just take my word for it.
> 
> Seriously, though, you can't really judge reactions by text in a lot of cases.  It can appear to be more harsh than intended. Most of the time, anyway.  The comparison with guinea pigs, fish etc, are just the usual response to help make a point. Most believe that tarantulas are display creatures only and advise accordingly. There is too often the potential for disaster. Finding an escaped sling can be an exercise in futility. even an adult spider can be quite difficult to locate. And really, an escape is the best-case scenario, at least the spider has a shot at surviving and being located. But an injured spider is often an ex-spider before it is over. Given time, you'll probably make similar observation on one matter or another.
> 
> ...


Trial by fire? I think you mean trial by ouchie, which is far worse than any punishment. No pun intended. Haha


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## pyro fiend (Mar 20, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> Nope, like Tim said, just to get the point across, congrats on your new little T, and enjoy it, and welcome to the hobby!
> 
> ---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 09:12 PM ----------
> 
> ...


Hahawell was i suppises to say "as the crazy ladies said. Or should i havebeen mean and gone with "the ... Erm....." yea i got nothing.. I cant be mean to you guys lmao.. But hah yea.. Burned is the word.. Iv stalked the forums for over 5yrs religiously before i joined.. And iv seen 10x worse then yours.. This thread is about as burning as warm accidental spit.. Some do get burned some id even say 2nd degree..but this is nothing aposed to the napalm iv seen others get.

But imo if u arnt gona grow thick skin quick your screwed.some people are determined a baptized by fire even after seeing it happen before..


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

IHeartTs said:


> There's lot of sarcasm here. 97% of it is playful. I wish some of our old threads gone weird were easily accessible, you'd see the good humor many of us have
> 
> ---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 02:19 PM ----------
> 
> ...


Especially posts by Tim.. when he makes up those poems and songs I want to die laughing!


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## IHeartTs (Mar 20, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> Especially posts by Tim.. when he makes up those poems and songs I want to die laughing!


They truly make my day. The Christmas thread. Omg. Wasn't it Tim who introduced everyone to ouchie?


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

pyro fiend said:


> Hahawell was i suppises to say "as the crazy ladies said. Or should i havebeen mean and gone with "the ... Erm....." yea i got nothing.. I cant be mean to you guys lmao.. But hah yea.. Burned is the word.. Iv stalked the forums for over 5yrs religiously before i joined.. And iv seen 10x worse then yours.. This thread is about as burning as warm accidental spit.. Some do get burned some id even say 2nd degree..but this is nothing aposed to the napalm iv seen others get


+1 I agree with you 100%, I have seen some pretty bad threads on here as well


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## Tim Benzedrine (Mar 20, 2015)

Shh! She's new! She isn't ready for Ouchie! but then, who is?


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

IHeartTs said:


> They truly make my day. The Christmas thread. Omg. Wasn't it Tim who introduced everyone to ouchie?


I can't remember, I think it was hahaha ah I will never forget it

That geniculata song Tim wrote, man that one was good hahaha

"If you like geniculata.."


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## Mhairi Sneddon (Mar 20, 2015)

Ok everyone thanks I'm sorry for being defensive I've never posted on any forum for anything before and I get that everyone is passionate about it. Believe me I done tons of research before I bought one and I obviously still have ALOT to learn to.  Ps I'm not a bro lol! And i appreciate you taking 20 mins to type lol

Reactions: Like 3


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

Tim Benzedrine said:


> Shh! She's new! She isn't ready for Ouchie! but then, who is?


Don't you start again with ouchie! Lol!

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 09:26 PM ----------




Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Ok everyone thanks I'm sorry for being defensive I've never posted on any forum for anything before and I get that everyone is passionate about it. Believe me I done tons of research before I bought one and I obviously still have ALOT to learn to.  Ps I'm not a bro lol! And i appreciate you taking 20 mins to type lol


It's okay, everyone needs to start somewhere


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## pyro fiend (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Ok everyone thanks I'm sorry for being defensive I've never posted on any forum for anything before and I get that everyone is passionate about it. Believe me I done tons of research before I bought one and I obviously still have ALOT to learn to.  Ps I'm not a bro lol! And i appreciate you taking 20 mins to type lol


Everyone can be a bro.. Unless you prefer bro-ette lmao 

But yea np.. I think.. Again wanted to seem like i had a spine, but not hoofs xD


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## IHeartTs (Mar 20, 2015)

Tim Benzedrine said:


> Shh! She's new! She isn't ready for Ouchie! but then, who is?


Obviously the ones who hire him to do the unthinkable at parties.


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## Graeboe (Mar 20, 2015)

Tim Benzedrine said:


> I wouldn't run off. The responses you received were actually very mild. Hint:" Try "Am I ready for an OBT?" if ya REALLY want a trial by fire.  On second thought, just take my word for it.
> 
> Seriously, though, you can't really judge reactions by text in a lot of cases.  It can appear to be more harsh than intended. Most of the time, anyway.  The comparison with guinea pigs, fish etc, are just the usual response to help make a point. Most believe that tarantulas are display creatures only and advise accordingly. There is too often the potential for disaster. Finding an escaped sling can be an exercise in futility. even an adult spider can be quite difficult to locate. And really, an escape is the best-case scenario, at least the spider has a shot at surviving and being located. But an injured spider is often an ex-spider before it is over. Given time, you'll probably make similar observation on one matter or another.
> 
> ...


Your a sweetie Tim? No wonder moxie likes you 

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 04:04 PM ----------




IHeartTs said:


> Trial by fire? I think you mean trial by ouchie, which is far worse than any punishment. No pun intended. Haha


Hey now I put every took away in the chest last week.....

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 04:12 PM ----------




Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Ok everyone thanks I'm sorry for being defensive I've never posted on any forum for anything before and I get that everyone is passionate about it. Believe me I done tons of research before I bought one and I obviously still have ALOT to learn to.  Ps I'm not a bro lol! And i appreciate you taking 20 mins to type lol


It's ok you haven't gotten as defensive as some people we've seen on here. Best thing always is no matter how anyone on here answers just take it, weigh it, follow up with a little research and you'll either find out why they are right, why they feel that way, or why they are wrong and have the data to refute it. But all in all its a good group here even if maybe a little non PC. Lol


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## GG80 (Mar 20, 2015)

I was the first to reply to this thread and assured the girl (I assume you're a girl as your name appears to be Gaelic and you're from Scotland, if not, I appologize.) that she would be welcomed and recieve helpful advice. I forgot to mention that we are pretty much straight to the point here and as we are passionate about this hobby, it's possible that we could be mistaken for arogant and agressive.

Stick with the forum Mhairi, I promise this experience of your first thread is just a missunderstanding .

Try starting a 'G. rosea not eating' thread as I did back when I was a newbie and see what happens


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 20, 2015)

Re: Ouchie... obviously this predates me. But are you guys talking about... that clown?

(god I hate clowns)


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## Graeboe (Mar 20, 2015)

Blueandbluer said:


> Re: Ouchie... obviously this predates me. But are you guys talking about... that clown?
> 
> (god I hate clowns)


Just don't Google search it lol


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 20, 2015)

Graeboe said:


> Just don't Google search it lol


I may be dumb, but I am not that dumb.


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

Graeboe said:


> Just don't Google search it lol


Yes! That's just a no no.. big mistake if you google it..


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## cold blood (Mar 20, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Thanks for the tips. I dont have arachnophobia I always liked all kinds of insect ever since i remember. But i think im just going to delete my account. I am nice to everyone I dont see the point in being blunt with people.


As said, that's an over-reaction big time.   No one slammed you, they just educated you.   Your intentions are not uncommon, and despite most of our distain for handling, education against it doesn't mean you are being slammed, you simply got good advice that you weren't expecting or wanting to hear....classic educating frustrations on our part.  Getting advice you didn't expect should be refreshing and welcomed, not frowned upon or frustrating.  

Nobody accused you of treating them like toys or a joke, I don't even know where that came from.  Your love of these critters is MORE than enough for us to accept you with open arms.

When you were in school and spelled something wrong and the teacher corrected you, did you get offended, run out of class, never to return to that perceived abuse, or did you stay and LEARN how and why its spelled that way, become friendly with teacher and become better for it in the long run?  Same applies here, stick around, you are almost guaranteed to benefit.

You have lots in common with the people here, I'm sure...and friends awaiting you as well.   Welcome to the hobby and to the boards, there's a ton of experience here and good people spending a lot of their free time just to talk t's or help people out...enjoy AB!!

Reactions: Like 2


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

Blueandbluer said:


> Re: Ouchie... obviously this predates me. But are you guys talking about... that clown?
> 
> (god I hate clowns)


Ditto.. I think I may have clownphobia..

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 10:58 PM ----------




cold blood said:


> Your love of these critters is MORE than enough for us to accept you with open arms.


Nawwww how nice of you CB


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## cold blood (Mar 20, 2015)

GG80 said:


> Try starting a 'G. rosea not eating' thread as I did back when I was a newbie and see what happens


What happened was a boatload of good advice, right?


edit:  I've never liked clowns much either.:unsure:

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 04:05 PM ----------




lalberts9310 said:


> Ditto.. I think a may have clownphobia.


coulrophobia:wink:


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 20, 2015)

cold blood said:


> coulrophobia:wink:


Ouchiephobia :laugh:


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## Mhairi Sneddon (Mar 20, 2015)

Thanks again GG80  yes it is gaelic you are correct ;D took everything on board you and some others have said


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 20, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> Ouchiephobia :laugh:


Don't even get me started on Oompa Loompas.


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## GG80 (Mar 20, 2015)

cold blood said:


> What happened was a boatload of good advice, right?


Absolutely, but I must admit I felt a little silly after asking the question with so many threads on the topic . All part of the learning experience though. That's how we all learn, we ask questions.

Reactions: Like 1


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## IHeartTs (Mar 20, 2015)

Blueandbluer said:


> Re: Ouchie... obviously this predates me. But are you guys talking about... that clown?
> 
> (god I hate clowns)


Google it. Don't listen to anyone else


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## King Sparta (Mar 20, 2015)

Glad you asked. I would advise against handling slings. Very small, fast and skittish. If it were to escape, finding it would be so hard. If you must handle at all, handle it
when it becomes bigger.


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## Tim Benzedrine (Mar 20, 2015)

Once again, I feel compelled to point out that it was not *I* that invoked the name of Ouchie. Sheesh, you guys are really sick! Some of you obviously have a deep-rooted clown fetish 

Last night in a discussion via PM, to my horror I realized the similarity between the Bette Midler song title "The Rose" and "The Rosea".

Sometimes I really wish I didn't make these realizations.


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## pyro fiend (Mar 20, 2015)

Tim Benzedrine said:


> Once again, I feel compelled to point out that it was not *I* that invoked the name of Ouchie. Sheesh, you guys are really sick! Some of you obviously have a deep-rooted clown fetish
> 
> Last night in a discussion via PM, to my horror I realized the similarity between the Bette Midler song title "The Rose" and "The Rosea".
> 
> Sometimes I really wish I didn't make these realizations.


Sometimes i think... Tim is on some 'good stuff' and its some pricey stuff.. Most likely a cuban "import" of 'goods'  as far as i can tell xD


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## Ellenantula (Mar 20, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> "Lovely ladies" hehehe, you heard that ellenantula?


I missed it before!  And I needed to hear anything nice today.  Had my dreaded eye appt today.  So -- did I need glasses?  No!  
I was referred to opthalm-something-or-other-surgeon specialist guy for left eye lens replacement surgery.  I am legally blind in left eye until surgery. :-(



lalberts9310 said:


> Yep I used to handle, I posted about it and got flamed, if you think this was rude you should've seen the comments I received, but I made a choice, never handled again and stayed on the forums.. and I'm glad I did


Yeah, my first post wasn't received that well either.  And all I did was post that I was a newbie with an OBT and was having difficulty re-housing the fellow and I got flamed as if I was some ignorant newbie having difficulty re-housing an OBT something.  Rude people here!!!!:laugh:

---------- Post added 03-20-2015 at 09:20 PM ----------




pyro fiend said:


> Sometimes i think... Tim is on some 'good stuff' and its some pricey stuff.. Most likely a cuban "import" of 'goods'  as far as i can tell xD


Like that artificial sweetener you leave out in the baggie on the counter?  
And me, not usually a fan of those sugar replacements at all!


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 20, 2015)

My epic first thread is still on the first page of the chat board, got flamed here too. I guess it's just the way this place rolls. 

That and clown porn, apparently.

Reactions: Like 2


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## King Sparta (Mar 20, 2015)

I agree. some rude people here. But they are just trying to help. Can't blame them

Reactions: Like 1


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## Ellenantula (Mar 20, 2015)

Blueandbluer said:


> My epic first thread is still on the first page of the chat board, got flamed here too. I guess it's just the way this place rolls.
> 
> That and clown porn, apparently.


Well, to be fair, you did try to chat in the chat section -- you really should read the rules first.:biggrin:

Reactions: Like 1


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## pyro fiend (Mar 20, 2015)

Ellenantula said:


> I missed it before!  And I needed to hear anything nice today.  Had my dreaded eye appt today.  So -- did I need glasses?  No!
> I was referred to opthalm-something-or-other-surgeon specialist guy for left eye lens replacement surgery.  I am legally blind in left eye until surgery. :-(
> 
> 
> ...


Lol oh no yours was a but more chimically and made in a factory in same city. Pretty aure what hes on is a little more home grown and smuggled XD


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 20, 2015)

Ellenantula said:


> Well, to be fair, you did try to chat in the chat section -- you really should read the rules first.:biggrin:


You just made me laugh so hard I upset my cat.


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## Ellenantula (Mar 20, 2015)

pyro fiend said:


> Lol oh no yours was a but more chimically and made in a factory in same city. Pretty aure what hes on is a little more home grown and smuggled XD


As long as you aren't trying to tell me that wasn't generic Splenda or NutriSweet it's all cool.


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## pyro fiend (Mar 20, 2015)

Ellenantula said:


> As long as you aren't trying to tell me that wasn't generic Splenda or NutriSweet it's all cool.


Well.. It wasnt exavtly cheap stuff, lets put it that way lmao

Reactions: Like 1


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## Chris LXXIX (Mar 20, 2015)

No, handle a T, no matter which, the size, "low" or "strong" venom potency etc  is the most stupid thing to do. Those who cares about T'S doesn't handle them.. they do their best to keep them happy.

Reactions: Like 1


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 21, 2015)

Blueandbluer said:


> My epic first thread is still on the first page of the chat board, got flamed here too. I guess it's just the way this place rolls.
> 
> That and clown porn, apparently.


You googled it!!!! :|

Reactions: Like 1


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## Tim Benzedrine (Mar 21, 2015)

Heh! I noticed that she must have, but I wasn't going to point that out. No matter how hard you try to discourage it, everybody does.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Poec54 (Mar 21, 2015)

King Sparta said:


> I agree. some rude people here. But they are just trying to help. Can't blame them


Not necessarily rude, but don't expect things to always be sugar-coated.

Reactions: Like 2


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 21, 2015)

Poec54 said:


> Not necessarily rude, but don't expect things to always be sugar-coated.


Yes, because how are we expected to be taken seriously when we sugar-coat everything?

Reactions: Like 2


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## Poec54 (Mar 21, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> Yes, because how are we expected to be taken seriously when we sugar-coat everything?


Excellent point.

Reactions: Like 1


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## Storm76 (Mar 21, 2015)

Simple answer to the question of the threadstarter:

Do what you want to - but be aware of the risks and consequences. Personally, I don't handle any of mine intentionally (although you could call opening the cage of the E. sp "red" intentional...they immediately crawl out) simply because I don't think it's worth it. I don't put my own gain over that of my animals and they sure as hell don't need any more contact with a human than necessary. Feeding, watering, making sure their "home" (as in enclosure) is correctly set up and maintained, that's it. 

Then why do I keep them? Because I love watching them do their thing, admire their beautiful coloration and simply sit there sometimes for hours on end since it is a very calming thing to just observe - patience provided. And I think lots of people getting into this hobby do so with the wrong expectations. Especially about patience...

Reactions: Like 4


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## Dave Marschang (Mar 21, 2015)

pyro fiend said:


> Sorry sneddon a simple search would have shown you nearly none of us handle...
> 
> 
> I get so tired of this response!
> ...

Reactions: Like 4


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## Ellenantula (Mar 21, 2015)

god61021 said:


> Last edited by god61021; Today at 10:08 AM. Reason: wasnt done yet


Is there more?  lol
I feel your pain, really I do.

Hi -- I'm Ellen, how are you?  Welcome to the boards! The experts will be arriving shortly to give you knowledge that absolutely positively no one else on this planet has!

Reactions: Like 2


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## horanjp (Mar 21, 2015)

Poec54 said:


> Not necessarily rude, but don't expect things to always be sugar-coated.


Lol...esp from poec....

Just don't expect flammable subjects to produce unexpected results. Silence is golden, and duct tape is silver. Welcome to the boards. Search is on the upper right.


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 21, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> You googled it!!!! :|


Actually I did not. Upsettingly, I was already familiar. 

Like I said, guys, I've been on the internet a looooooong time. :laugh:


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## Graeboe (Mar 21, 2015)

Blueandbluer said:


> Actually I did not. Upsettingly, I was already familiar.
> 
> Like I said, guys, I've been on the internet a looooooong time. :laugh:


Soooooo tempted to come up with a response for long time internet habits lol but then again there is that saying of a certain pot and kettle that I try and stay away from lol

---------- Post added 03-21-2015 at 11:41 AM ----------




Poec54 said:


> Not necessarily rude, but don't expect things to always be sugar-coated.


Sugar coating takes to mush extra work. Lol adding all that frosting. Already spent my hour of free time feedinf and watering my slings lol

Reactions: Like 1


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## Poec54 (Mar 21, 2015)

god61021 said:


> pyro fiend said:
> 
> 
> > People join forums to talk to people who love the same things they do, not to spend all day rereading old conversations other people have had...I say to hell with your search function, I'm looking to talk to folks.
> ...

Reactions: Like 1


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## pyro fiend (Mar 21, 2015)

god61021 said:


> pyro fiend said:
> 
> 
> > Sorry sneddon a simple search would have shown you nearly none of us handle...
> ...


Oh shooting at the beast of burden eh? Well if you read the entire thing i did yes say a search would show you the answer.. Never did i say she was waisting my time..if he was. i wouldnt reply.trust me i do this from time to time. So no need to assult me because i said search function..in my 4 first years all i did was read old posts..literally and maybe its just me but i enjoyed it i found everyones imput nice i didnt hafta wait on a reply, i didnt have a target onmy back and i can do what i pleased.. One look and you can see at least 1 time a week someone is burned..using the search bar it saves everyone.. Just look the op THOUGHT we was being a-holes and was gona leave the forum.. Sure mine was blunt but its a fact it will bring up a ton of info and you dont hafta feel dumb, harrased or embarrased..

I can relate with you here.. Im the only one i knew realy that kept exotics.. Iv had lemurs, monkeys, tegu, parrots, cockatoo and much much more and noone i knew originally understood why i kept them..iv even had people just give me an animal.. Did i throw it in a paper towl enclosure for a month wiel eveyone commented on what it was and how to keep it? No. I put my nose to the grindstone and found out what it was wiel i waited (ofc a species ID is necessary in some situations as I receive bearded dragons and beaded lizards in the same enclosure) and found most out by a search function (and not google) ...Iv even helped other keepers with knowledge iv found because i used to net and they didnt.. And guess where i learned the information.. Wasnt making a post.. Was a search function..

But poec has a point on how these post run people away iv stalked these forums for 5years and selectivly read what i want to gain knowledge. And only occasionally did i read the repetitive rosie posts or the "is my cage ok for my new T"... and when i joined i felt it was my duty to share all information i knew...now.. Only a year into my owning.. I see why some of the more knowledgable people have low post counts... I find myself seeing some posts and compleatly ignore them, marking as read so i dont look at them.. So as i said if i didnt want to waist my time.. I wouldnt.. I was helping him because we got what, 7 diferent people to reply? And if you typed in handling or something similar youd have alot more.. Plus again no need to wait.. 

If the search bar comment annoys you so much.. Stick around a year see the SAME type of post.. Every...single...week... It gets old.. And this is coming from a person who tolorated the sillyness rather well, as you can see from me joking with ellen and lal as well as i joke with tim and 14pokies (dnt think he posted here tho) quite often.. I have a superb tolorence for the horsing around.. But a simple 2 word search vs a paragraph or more of typing can save a whole lot of time and get more info

Reactions: Like 4


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## Squidies (Mar 21, 2015)

Tim Benzedrine said:


> Once again, I feel compelled to point out that it was not *I* that invoked the name of Ouchie. Sheesh, you guys are really sick! Some of you obviously have a deep-rooted clown fetish
> 
> Last night in a discussion via PM, to my horror I realized the similarity between the Bette Midler song title "The Rose" and "The Rosea".
> 
> Sometimes I really wish I didn't make these realizations.


This also predates me, and now I'm really curious as to what all the excitement is over. Surely it couldn't be anything worse than what I'd find on a typical Reddit/4chan thread!?


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## pyro fiend (Mar 21, 2015)

Squidies said:


> This also predates me, and now I'm really curious as to what all the excitement is over. Surely it couldn't be anything worse than what I'd find on a typical Reddit/4chan thread!?


Google it and see xD


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## Dave Marschang (Mar 21, 2015)

I am new to THIS forum but not forums, and they are all the same. Now I will admit you both throw out some good points (pyro and poec)but I stick to my point that while trying not to drive off the "experts" the rudeness DOES drive off the noobs who one day might have become the next generation of experts, but now have gerbils instead of tarantulas because they got yelled at. (pyro you got singled because you were first to type the dreaded sentence. but it was an attack on that sort of reply not you personally)
I also stick to my "to hell with the search function" statement (though I am being a little tongue in cheek about it). I am here to meet like minded people, and most posts are to start a convo. I personally do use the search when I NEED info as I am too impatient to wait for a reply (especially when the first three will be "hey I don't know the answer either") but I still say don't beat on those who don't either help them out or skip to the next damn thread! lol


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 21, 2015)

Graeboe said:
			
		

> Soooooo tempted to come up with a response for long time internet habits lol but then again there is that saying of a certain pot and kettle that I try and stay away from lol


A wise man knows when his own slate is not clean.


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## Graeboe (Mar 21, 2015)

Blueandbluer said:


> A wise man knows when his own slate is not clean.


Just keep the UV light away

Reactions: Like 1


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 21, 2015)

Graeboe said:


> Just keep the UV light away


You just legit made me cackle. Well done, sir. 

(Does clown paint react to UV? Graeboe may know the answer.)


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 21, 2015)

Graeboe said:


> Just keep the UV light away


I almost spilled my coffee over the table when I read this LOL!!!!

---------- Post added 03-21-2015 at 09:32 PM ----------




Blueandbluer said:


> You just legit made me cackle. Well done, sir.
> 
> (Does clown paint react to UV? Graeboe may know the answer.)


Graeboe.. are you ouchie behind a fake user name???? LOL


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## Graeboe (Mar 21, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> I almost spilled my coffee over the table when I read this LOL!!!!
> 
> ---------- Post added 03-21-2015 at 09:32 PM ----------
> 
> ...


Nah just on a double shift running my store alone today and felt like giving out some laughs.

Reactions: Like 2


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## scott99 (Mar 22, 2015)

lot of you guys who are against handing seem to be kind of mean about it. This is to all people who like to handle their T, KEEP HANDLING THEM, don't listen to them. They are just tying prove that know more about tarantulas then you do, That why they are mean about it. when people like them, say something  mean like they do and someone call them out,they get all up arms and start they justify their action. if someone is mean about something don't listen to them its not worth your time.


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## BobGrill (Mar 22, 2015)

THE DARK KNIGHT said:


> lot of you guy who are against handing seen to be kind of mean about it and to all people who like to handle their T, KEEP HANDLING THEM.


Don't know if it's the terrible grammar or the terrible advice that makes this post so cringeworthy.

Reactions: Like 6


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 22, 2015)

THE DARK KNIGHT said:


> lot of you guy who are against handing seen to be kind of mean about it and to all people who like to handle their T, KEEP HANDLING THEM.


Seriously? How many times do we have to explain our reasons behind why handling is a bad thing? What point don't you get?

I don't really think you understand the concept of "mean", and the difference between being 'mean' and being 'serious'.

Don't start a debate, because you are NOT going to win...

Reactions: Like 1


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## Singapore_Blue1 (Mar 22, 2015)

How many people on here have a degree in entomology with a speciality in arachnology? I am just curious because many on here act like they do have one. I have to say that there are a lot of people on here that are extremely rude. They try to say that being blunt but in fact they are being rude. I've been on here for quite some time and this type of behavior has turned me off to where I wanted to quit and not be on this form anymore. If everyone on here keeps running people off and you will not have a hobby. The thing that you have to realize is that you're not just running off newbies but I'm going to guess that you have run off some people with experience is well. Anyone that does not see this is any type of issue is very very naïve or incredibly stupid. Take it for what it's worth but I have spoken to somebody with a degree and speciality in arachnids and this individual I hate to inform all of you does not agree with the majority of the opinions on this post. But I guess this person should not have this degree because everyone on here must know more. Opinions are just that opinions. I'm sorry but I'm gonna take the person that actually has an education over someone else's opinion. But as usual I'm sure somebody else on here knows more than somebody with an education/speciality in this field.


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## GG80 (Mar 22, 2015)

Singapore_Blue1 said:


> How many people on here have a degree in entomology with a speciality in arachnology? I am just curious because many on here act like they do have one. I have to say that there are a lot of people on here that are extremely rude. They try to say that being blunt but in fact they are being rude. I've been on here for quite some time and this type of behavior has turned me off to where I wanted to quit and not be on this form anymore. If everyone on here keeps running people off and you will not have a hobby. The thing that you have to realize is that you're not just running off newbies but I'm going to guess that you have run off some people with experience is well. Anyone that does not see this is any type of issue is very very naïve or incredibly stupid. Take it for what it's worth but I have spoken to somebody with a degree and speciality in arachnids and this individual I hate to inform all of you does not agree with the majority of the opinions on this post. But I guess this person should not have this degree because everyone on here must know more. Opinions are just that opinions. I'm sorry but I'm gonna take the person that actually has an education over someone else's opinion. But as usual I'm sure somebody else on here knows more than somebody with an education/speciality in this field.


To be fair, it doesn't take an expert to see that a spider would prefer to be left alone.

Reactions: Like 3


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 22, 2015)

Singapore_Blue1 said:


> How many people on here have a degree in entomology with a speciality in arachnology? I am just curious because many on here act like they do have one. I have to say that there are a lot of people on here that are extremely rude. They try to say that being blunt but in fact they are being rude. I've been on here for quite some time and this type of behavior has turned me off to where I wanted to quit and not be on this form anymore. If everyone on here keeps running people off and you will not have a hobby. The thing that you have to realize is that you're not just running off newbies but I'm going to guess that you have run off some people with experience is well. Anyone that does not see this is any type of issue is very very naïve or incredibly stupid. Take it for what it's worth but I have spoken to somebody with a degree and speciality in arachnids and this individual I hate to inform all of you does not agree with the majority of the opinions on this post. But I guess this person should not have this degree because everyone on here must know more. Opinions are just that opinions. I'm sorry but I'm gonna take the person that actually has an education over someone else's opinion. But as usual I'm sure somebody else on here knows more than somebody with an education/speciality in this field.


How by fact do YOU know, that any of us were being rude? By reading a comment on a forum alone? Nobody here think that they have a degree in entomology with a speciality in arachnology. Most of the members here, speak from experience alone, practical experience, such as poec54 (Rick) who have dealt with far more tarantula species and has the most experience in the hobby than anyone else I know. Anyone can have a degree in a particular practice, it doesn't make them EXPERIENCED, the experience comes in when you have had practically dealt with that certain practice, not what you have learned from theory. And this thread was about handling a T, what we thought was that its a bad thing, because it's mainly bad for the well-being of the TARANTULA, do you say they have the brain, thoughts, feelings emotions of an mammalian? 

The thing that agitates me the most on this forum, is some people asking for advice, and when they get straight-forward honest advice we are accused of being rude. Why do we need to sugarcoat? If we sugarcoat everything none of the advice will be taken seriously and will be treated as a joke. This is essential for the survival of the hobby, the hobby will die much faster with reckless irresponsible people in it than it would with reckless irresponsible people running off. The other thing that makes me sick is people giving bad advice, and people approving bad advice.

Reactions: Like 3


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## GG80 (Mar 22, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> How by fact do YOU know, that any of us were being rude? By reading a comment on a forum alone? Nobody here think that they have a degree in entomology with a speciality in arachnology. Most of the members here, speak from experience alone, practical experience, such as poec54 (Rick) who have dealt with far more tarantula species and has the most experience in the hobby than anyone else I know. Anyone can have a degree in a particular practice, it doesn't make them EXPERIENCED, the experience comes in when you have had practically dealt with that certain practice, not what you have learned from theory. And this thread was about handling a T, what we thought was that its a bad thing, because it's mainly bad for the well-being of the TARANTULA, do you say they have the brain, thoughts, feelings emotions of an mammalian?
> 
> The thing that agitates me the most on this forum, is some people asking for advice, and when they get straight-forward honest advice we are accused of being rude. Why do we need to sugarcoat? If we sugarcoat everything none of the advice will be taken seriously and will be treated as a joke. This is essential for the survival of the hobby, the hobby will die much faster with reckless irresponsible people in it than it would with reckless irresponsible people running off. The other thing that makes me sick is people giving bad advice, and people approving bad advice.


Great point. I once worked on a building site as a labourer and the foreman had a degree in engineering but he never lifted a tool in his life. You wouldn't believe the amount of times I had to explain to him what I was doing and why. He didn't have a clue but he had a piece of paper. Bottom line, experience is real education.

Reactions: Like 4


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 22, 2015)

.. well I'm off to bed..

This is how I feel right now.. :wall: banging my head against a wall


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## Dave Marschang (Mar 22, 2015)

I agree with Singapore blue 100%. thing is no matter how good you're advice is if you say it in a way that makes the other person feel stupid, they stop listening. if a post makes you mad skip it, or calm down, throw some help out there and hope they listen, but if your a prick about it I can guarantee they will not.

I think some of the members on here think that their experience makes them a better class of citizen and it shows in their messages.
IMO they are no better than school yard bully's who are picking on those who are not as well equipped for the battle because they know they will win.
raising themselves up by stepping on others.
It's funny that you mention poec54 as having the most experience on here, because he also appears to have the worst attitude.
 why don't you elite members create a newbie free section where the rest of us idiots aren't allowed? then you wont have to worry about our irritating questions.


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## 14pokies (Mar 22, 2015)

Mhairi Sneddon said:


> Hi everyone, I am relatively new to the hobby. I bought a B.Smithi spiderling 5 weeks ago which is just 1cm in length and I maintained I wouldn't handle it until it was older. I have however taken it out once and it seemed really nervous and ran quite fast. I just wanted some opinions on handling slings, should I or shouldn't I? I don't want to make a habbit out of it anyway but it would be good to know other peoples personal opinions/experiences
> Thanks in advance guys:biggrin:.


You have to ask yourself two very basic questions and you have to way the pros and the cons.... 

Who benefits the most from the interaction and who has the most to lose?

Pros chicks think its sexy watching you tangle with a 9 in rufilata....  Well that's reason enough now for the cons

The spiders can get wicked stressed esp if you have to coax them from there hide/web...you can drop and injure/kill the T...you can lose the T.. If the T kicks hair on your hands and arms people may think you shoot the heavy.. 

You can get bit...you can get sued if you lose the T and it bites someone else..If you get bit while a hot chick is watching and freak out you lose all street credit with that girl...

The T gets nothing from being handled... We do but at a huge risk to them... I have heard an interesting theory though by some pro handling keepers that alot of your keepers that bash handlers to death do it because they are to chicken to handle there Ts... If they convince everyone handling is as bad as throwing kittens in trash can they can hide behind that as there reasoning instead of fessing up that there afraid of there spiders.. 

I have to be honest I think that might be the case with some of our more agressive anti handling members..( stop beating on newbs and handlers admit your chicken its OK)


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 22, 2015)

god61021 said:


> I agree with Singapore blue 100%. thing is no matter how good you're advice is if you say it in a way that makes the other person feel stupid, they stop listening. if a post makes you mad skip it, or calm down, throw some help out there and hope they listen, but if your a prick about it I can guarantee they will not.
> 
> I think some of the members on here think that their experience makes them a better class of citizen and it shows in their messages.
> IMO they are no better than school yard bully's who are picking on those who are not as well equipped for the battle because they know they will win.
> ...


Excuse me, irritating questions? Maybe you didn't read ANY post toroughly to realise that majority of people who posted here was being quite friendly? Maybe you should re-read what I posted about what sickness me: accused of being rude when indeed not, bad advice, and approval of bad advice.. nowhere did I say I hate answering newbie questions, in-fact, I like to help out.

And I stand by what I said, at least Rick is doing SOMETHING to keep this hobby from dying by the hands of people that advice handling Ts, even those that handle OW is a good thing. Get to know Rick and you'll know his not a person that thinks he's better and above all, he devotes his free time, to answering questions and helping fellow hobbyists, he could've devoted that time on stroking his ego, but no, he devotes his spare time to help fellow hobbyists.  He doesn't need to, but he does, now tell me that's self centered of him? Tell me he's selfish if he sends off tons of freebie slings to new hobbyists that order Ts from him? Tell me he's selfish if he devotes his time in educating those new in the hobby?

---------- Post added 03-23-2015 at 03:15 AM ----------




14pokies said:


> You have to ask yourself two very basic questions and you have to way the pros and the cons....
> 
> Who benefits the most from the interaction and who has the most to lose?
> 
> ...


No one is chicken, I used to handle, but don't anymore.. now call me chicken

Reactions: Like 3


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## Dave Marschang (Mar 22, 2015)

I did say "APPEARS to have the worst attitude". I do admit it is hard to judge a persons mood by text and if I am wrong I will be the first to admit it.


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 22, 2015)

god61021 said:


> I did say "APPEARS to have the worst attitude". I do admit it is hard to judge a persons mood by text and if I am wrong I will be the first to admit it.


Well I have to tell you, about Rick, you are wrong..

---------- Post added 03-23-2015 at 03:22 AM ----------

Well now I'm going to admit it, my last posts were indeed rude, and this isn't me.. but some people should really take into consideration what some of these members go through and what they devote to help newcomers and to keep the hobby going. And I am far from "elite", I mean I own 5 Ts.. I just try to understand the reasons and see the points more experienced members on here make about certain things regarding Ts

Reactions: Like 1


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## theconmacieist (Mar 22, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> [Well now I'm going to admit it, my last posts were indeed rude, and this isn't me.. but some people should really take into consideration what some of these members go through and what they devote to help newcomers and to keep the hobby going.


   How about a compromise. Some people should take your consideration and some people can lighten up.


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## Ellenantula (Mar 22, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> Anyone can have a degree in a particular practice, it doesn't make them EXPERIENCED, the experience comes in when you have had practically dealt with that certain practice, not what you have learned from theory. And this thread was about handling


True.  Be like saying only pediatricians are qualified to raise children.

I try to be kind and offer my limited assistance (beginner T keeper here) if I can.

Re: experts w/degrees: 
My macaw broke a wing blood feather (her third in 18 years I've had her -- must have bumped her wing on something) about 3 years or so ago. 
I needed a second set of hands to help me save my panicking macaw.  So I called the local vets (husb/wife team) to meet me at their office to pull the feather.
They didn't know to support the wing first, or wing shoulder might pull out of joint before the feather came out since feathers are in there pretty tight. 
They didn't know to pull out straight in the direction the feather was growing -- if it breaks under the skin -- BAD.  Would require surgery but she would have bled out before it could be done.
A broken blood feather is similar to having an open ended catheter in a vein -- like a straw spurting blood and if it is pulled out completely, surrounding tissue will close, coagulate and heal up.
I ended up, after seeing their 2 near goofs of help, letting them hold my macaw while I pulled the offending broken feather out.
Experience is way more important than theoretical knowledge.  And neither vet copped an attitude or took offense at my experience.
My vets learned a LOT about parrots that day and even confided the lack of hands-on experience with any exotics in school.

Am I smarter than my vets?  Of course NOT. 
And this story doesn't make them dumb either -- I trust them completely with my cat and dog care -- they also do large animal practice. And had they worked with parrots before and gained experience, this would be a different story. But exotics simply weren't their area of expertise.

Remember Good Will Hunting?  The genius who lacked practical social experience & skills. No knowledge can replace real experience.

Is the T help more important than its delivery?  I think it is.  I'd prefer sugar-coating, but the help is more important than the helper's "style."
Only you can decide if good help from an experience handler is worth not being babied and hand-held.  
I will take experienced help every time (cuz Ts aren't macaws and I need that help!!!!)

Reactions: Like 5


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 22, 2015)

Ellenantula said:


> True.  Be like saying only pediatricians are qualified to raise children.
> 
> I try to be kind and offer my limited assistance (beginner T keeper here) if I can.
> 
> ...


This is exactly the point I'm trying to get across here


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## 14pokies (Mar 22, 2015)

lalberts9310 said:


> Excuse me, irritating questions? Maybe you didn't read ANY post toroughly to realise that majority of people who posted here was being quite friendly? Maybe you should re-read what I posted about what sickness me: accused of being rude when indeed not, bad advice, and approval of bad advice.. nowhere did I say I hate answering newbie questions, in-fact, I like to help out.
> 
> And I stand by what I said, at least Rick is doing SOMETHING to keep this hobby from dying by the hands of people that advice handling Ts, even those that handle OW is a good thing. Get to know Rick and you'll know his not a person that thinks he's better and above all, he devotes his free time, to answering questions and helping fellow hobbyists, he could've devoted that time on stroking his ego, but no, he devotes his spare time to help fellow hobbyists.  He doesn't need to, but he does, now tell me that's self centered of him? Tell me he's selfish if he sends off tons of freebie slings to new hobbyists that order Ts from him? Tell me he's selfish if he devotes his time in educating those new in the hobby?
> 
> ...


Chicken!:laugh:


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## Poec54 (Mar 22, 2015)

Singapore_Blue1 said:


> How many people on here have a degree in entomology with a speciality in arachnology? I am just curious because many on here act like they do have one. I have to say that there are a lot of people on here that are extremely rude. They try to say that being blunt but in fact they are being rude. I've been on here for quite some time and this type of behavior has turned me off to where I wanted to quit and not be on this form anymore. If everyone on here keeps running people off and you will not have a hobby. The thing that you have to realize is that you're not just running off newbies but I'm going to guess that you have run off some people with experience is well. Anyone that does not see this is any type of issue is very very naïve or incredibly stupid. Take it for what it's worth but I have spoken to somebody with a degree and speciality in arachnids and this individual I hate to inform all of you does not agree with the majority of the opinions on this post. But I guess this person should not have this degree because everyone on here must know more. Opinions are just that opinions. I'm sorry but I'm gonna take the person that actually has an education over someone else's opinion. But as usual I'm sure somebody else on here knows more than somebody with an education/speciality in this field.


As I recall, you were handling OW's, and apparently thought that would go over well here.  Reality check: that's the kind of thing that will get tarantulas banned.  We'd like to keep the hobby going, in spite of the thrill seekers.  

A degree doesn't mean they actually work with live animals, especially tarantulas, so that doesn't necessarily mean their opinions on this are any more valid than ours.  We're into husbandry and breeding, entomologists/arachnologists usually aren't.  Hobbyists have a very different perspective.  

There are indeed people we don't want in the hobby, that do reckless things with their spiders with little regard for the possible long-term consequences.  Just because someone bought a tarantula doesn't mean they should have one.  Some people buy them for the wrong reasons; to show off, to prove their courage, etc.  The sooner they're out of the hobby, the better.

---------- Post added 03-22-2015 at 11:24 PM ----------




god61021 said:


> I did say "APPEARS to have the worst attitude". I do admit it is hard to judge a persons mood by text and if I am wrong I will be the first to admit it.


Check out all the help I've given to beginners, and all my 'friends' here and likes/thanks'.  Worst attitude?  Perhaps you need to do some looking before you make any more assumptions.  

And no, I certainly don't have the most experience here, nowhere near that.  Unfortunately the few that are left don't post very often.  Too many repetitive threads from beginners who ask the same questions every week and argue with the advice they're given.  We're trying to balance encouraging serious beginners, with keeping the experts. We're trying to keep from sinking to the lowest common denominator.  Some beginners think everything revolves around them, when it's the experts that are the foundation and determine whether this forum is truly an informative place or not.  One expert is worth 100 beginners, so I don't mind if a few transient newbies don't stick around.  I want to keep the remaining experts active here.

Reactions: Like 4


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## cold blood (Mar 23, 2015)

god61021 said:


> thing is no matter how good you're advice is if you say it in a way that makes the other person feel stupid


People come here, take their free time and answer questions.  They, however, cannot control how a person reads their post, or how it makes them feel, that's up to the reader.

I've seen way too many times people getting riled up because of perceived rudeness and not ACTUAL rudeness.   My advice to all you negative nellies would be to try to read posts with a positive attitude and tone and not with a condescending one, because its not generally reflective of how the person writing it intended.

The advice is far more important than the delivery, I don't understand how some people fail to get that.




+1 to ellantula and poec as well, solid points.

Reactions: Like 2


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## BobGrill (Mar 23, 2015)

Personally I can't take people who handle OWs seriously.

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## Dave Marschang (Mar 23, 2015)

[The advice is far more important than the delivery, I don't understand how some people fail to get that.


because as soon as you upset someone they get defensive, and then a far as they are concerned everything you say is null and void. it doesn't matter if you give them winning lotto numbers at this point. they are not listening to anything you say from that point on plain and simple.

I've seen it 1000 times, since you were rude the irritated person goes to the local pet store to get a second opinion where they are told by the 19 yr old employee that tarantulas can definitely survive on bananas and apple peels as long as you give them milk to drink once a week, and now the person with hurt feelings is vindicated, having a professional confirm they were right and from now on they are just not gonna bother with the jerks on the forum who obviously don't know what they are talking about. its human nature.

And the idea that by being this way you are running off the undesirables and getting them out of the hobby is ridiculous, all you are doing is ensuring that they will not publicly seek help for their T's. they will still have them, they just wont care for them properly.



+1 to ellantula and poec as well, solid points.[/QUOTE]


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 23, 2015)

god61021 said:


> [The advice is far more important than the delivery, I don't understand how some people fail to get that.
> 
> 
> because as soon as you upset someone they get defensive, and then a far as they are concerned everything you say is null and void. it doesn't matter if you give them winning lotto numbers at this point. they are not listening to anything you say from that point on plain and simple.
> ...


Repeating myself for the numerous time.. no one was being rude

Being rude: "you are stupid, irresponsible, selfish for holding your T, you don't care for his well-being, just for your own satisfaction. By handling your T you don't take the hobby serious and treat it as a joke. Leave this forum because you don't belong here"..

Was this how we responded?

Reactions: Like 1


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## cold blood (Mar 23, 2015)

Yeah god, you missed the point entirely...its not people being rude, its people assuming rudeness and needlessly over-reacting.  I've seen it 1000 times as well.

People need to have thicker skin and not be so easily offended or rattled, its as simple as that.  Defensive people are just less likely to actually learn something...as your example demonstrated.

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## Poec54 (Mar 23, 2015)

god61021 said:


> [The advice is far more important than the delivery, I don't understand how some people fail to get that.  because as soon as you upset someone they get defensive, and then a far as they are concerned everything you say is null and void. it doesn't matter if you give them winning lotto numbers at this point. they are not listening to anything you say from that point on plain and simple.
> 
> ... the idea that by being this way you are running off the undesirables and getting them out of the hobby is ridiculous, all you are doing is ensuring that they will not publicly seek help for their T's. they will still have them, they just wont care for them properly.


[/QUOTE]

Serious beginners are welcomed here with open arms.  We all do everything we can to help them.  They have great attitudes and want to learn.  What we don't do is encourage beginners who are doing the wrong things (handling OW's, getting an OBT right off the bat, etc).  Sugarcoating things for those people doesn't work.  They don't want to hear anyone telling them what they're doing isn't a good idea.  They want us to reinforce their bad decisions and to chit-chat with others who have equally poor judgment.  Sorry, we're not going to pretend that's okay.  Regulations and bans are a real possibility; countries and cities have done it already.  There's too many grandstanding politicians looking for a cause, and animals unpopular with the public are always a good one.  There's also anti-exotic pet groups with some clout.  We're defenseless against them.  If we don't police our ranks, the government will eventually do it for us.  Beginners don't get this.  With the stroke of a pen Florida banned Avics and Phormictopus cancerides (Haitian Brown) for years.  No public vote or consultation.  They banned hot scorpions.   Any government can ban whatever exotic animals they want.  If we can't show them we're responsible enough to own them, they'll take them away.  Do we really want the hobby to be taken down by a high profile incident from someone who's going to move on to something else before long anyways?  Show some respect to the hobby and the precarious position the hobby is in, to the long-term collector and breeders, and to the animals themselves.  One of the first things beginners need to learn is that this isn't just about 'Me, me, me.'  

We're not trying to run people off, but the ones that leave in a huff had their minds made up before they came here.  They're the high risk group for bites and escapes.  We give advice contrary to what they want to hear; some lose their temper, call us names, and leave in a big commotion, as Singapore Blue did a few months ago.  It's not the delivery, it's the expectation that we're going to say: 'Ah honey, it's fine to handle OW's, or to start off with an OBT.'  If someone wants encouragement for that kind of thing, they're not going to get that here.

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## Dave Marschang (Mar 23, 2015)

I agree 100%, these things should not be encouraged. my point is the delivery is VERY much important. if you want people to hear uncomfortable things you MUST be nice about it or they will not listen. 
you are also right that their minds probably are made up and there is little chance of them listening, but there is zero chance they will listen if you are a jerk about it.

police your ranks? you cant. you are a faceless line of text. for some you are an unpleasant conversation, they WILL just move on to more enjoyable company learning nothing.
 I have given you an opinion that doesn't match yours. I was abrasive about it. are you listening? no. more likely you will eventually just stop replying to me and move on to conversations less irritating. its what people do.

attacks on peoples character only anger them they do NOT convince them that you are right. 
Those are the posts I take issue with.
there are those on this forum (and every other corner of the internet) who enjoy making others look stupid.
and they are the ones hurting this hobby and need to be run off. not the new kids.

and before you even start don't make me go back and find the post where you said it was good that some people get ran off because the hobby is better without them.

Reactions: Like 2


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## Poec54 (Mar 23, 2015)

god61021 said:


> - I agree 100%, these things should not be encouraged. my point is the delivery is VERY much important. if you want people to hear uncomfortable things you MUST be nice about it or they will not listen.   you are also right that their minds probably are made up and there is little chance of them listening, but there is zero chance they will listen if you are a jerk about it.
> 
> - police your ranks? you cant. you are a faceless line of text. for some you are an unpleasant conversation, they WILL just move on to more enjoyable company learning nothing.
> 
> ...



- Stick around, many of the ones using poor judgment usually aren't open to changing.  Their attraction to owning a spider in the first place was to do things that make us cringe.   Too many use the 'shoot the messenger' approach.  It's a game.  You didn't say it exactly the way they wanted to hear, and they try to get others to jump thru hoops to appease them.  It's a smokescreen from the real issue, which is them getting the wrong spiders for the wrong reasons (handling, feats of courage, crazy videos, etc).  Don't expect us to play their game.    

- The hobby needs responsible people to 'police' our ranks and discourage risky behavior.  If it's cool and fashionable to say 'Do whatever you want, dude', there will always be some that take it too far, and those are the idiots that ruin it for everybody else. This is a bad political and legal climate for reckless behavior.  

- There have been very few 'attacks on character' here.  From what I've seen, the members focus on questionable decisions and behavior, and an occasional newbie will make a display of being 'offended' at the responsible advice they sought and are given, and will lash out and make personal insults at us.  You need to see some of them act like this before you have a full perspective of what we deal with here.  

- It absolutely is GOOD that some people leave the hobby.  I say that with pride.  Tens of thousands of people have tarantulas in this country, and a certain percentage of them bought a tarantula for the wrong reasons (see above).  We do not need more YouTube idiots, people holding OW's, putting tarantulas on their face and in their mouths, beginners pounding on their chests about how manly they are with an OBT, etc.  By all means the sooner they get out of the hobby, the better for all concerned.  There's nothing sacred about buying a spider, that alone doesn't make them one of us.  Unfortunately some are just too irresponsible and need to get rid of their spider(s) and find another way to get hurt, that won't potentially ruin an entire hobby.

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## Sam_Peanuts (Mar 23, 2015)

I've been on the internet long enough to stop caring about how people tell me things as long as the information I inquired about is there and I always read posts on a calm tone, it helps prevent a lot of misunderstanding and keeps me happier when reading.

It's the same thing everywhere, you just have to get used to it.

Reactions: Like 5


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 23, 2015)

Poec54 said:


> - Stick around, many of the ones using poor judgment usually aren't open to changing.


Much of what you say I agree with, Rick. But the above bugs me for one reason. I really dislike the "guilty until proven innocent" attitude that suggests that people prove their worth before they can participate in our reindeer games.

I realize you've been in the hobby so long that you've seen it at all and repeated yourself ad nauseam. But that's not a first time poster's fault. You may have written it a million times, but that's the first time that reader has heard it.  We shouldn't be taking out our frustrations on the wrong people. A first time poster may make mistakes, but they are not responsible for the mistakes of those thousands that came before them.

And in this case, people were pretty dang quick to assume the worst. Doesn't seem fair to me.

Reactions: Like 1


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## WindedFatnNasty (Mar 23, 2015)

I almost feel like questions like this should be ignored because I feel like these posts do more harm than good. When someone asks a question like this I'm almost certain they have already made up their mind on how they feel about it. People answer the question, then the OP feels offended and then almost justified in their actions because the people who are against it come across as being jerks even when they are not necessarily being one. There will always be people who lack better judgement and will do what they want no matter the consequences. I did it once with out a problem so it must be ok to do it again and again. What could go wrong? Let me put it this way, I was recently at a WIC class with my fiance and toward the end of the class she asked if any one had any questions. A girl raised her hand and asked if it was ok to smoke and drink while being pregnant. I couldn't believe someone would ask that because you know she was already doing this to begin with if the question even had to be asked. Haha some people, smh. I'm sorry if I'm being rude to the OP this is just how i genuinely feel. Take it how you want. Either way, I love it here. To most in the outside world (especially my mother in law) we are looked at with raised eyebrows when we say we keep tarantulas. I love that I can converse with other people that feel the same about these amazing creatures. Let's just agree to disagree and move on. We can't stop every owner from doing things that could harm the hobby unfortunately.

Reactions: Like 1


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## loftis14t (Mar 23, 2015)

^^what he said


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## cold blood (Mar 23, 2015)

Sam_Peanuts said:


> I've been on the internet long enough to stop caring about how people tell me things as long as the information I inquired about is there and I always read posts on a calm tone, it helps prevent a lot of misunderstanding and keeps me happier when reading.
> 
> It's the same thing everywhere, you just have to get used to it.



Sam gets what I'm saying.


god61021 said:


> I agree 100%, these things should not be encouraged. my point is the delivery is VERY much important. if you want people to hear uncomfortable things you MUST be nice about it or they will not listen.
> you are also right that their minds probably are made up and there is little chance of them listening, but there is zero chance they will listen if you are a jerk about it.
> 
> police your ranks? you cant. you are a faceless line of text. for some you are an unpleasant conversation, they WILL just move on to more enjoyable company learning nothing.
> ...


But god, that is my point exactly, the rudeness or abrasiveness is more often than not a perception of the reader, nothing else...not intended in any way by the person who posted.  I've gotten this many times, I'll write something, trying to help, not being anything but nice, only to have my post read with a terrible attitude and completely misinterpreted with regards to the attitude.   I can only be nice, I cannot however, control the attitude with which my posts are read, that's completely up to the reader.  Those with negative, defensive attitudes often read posts with their attitude and apply it whether its appropriate/intended or not.   Much of this perceived attitude comes from within the readers own mind and not the person attempting to help out by posting.

Take this common post;

You have too much distance between the substrate and the top of the enclosure and should add significantly more substrate not only to make it a safer enclosure but also so the t can burrow if it likes.   Without changes its just not a safe enclosure.

Read that with the right attitude and you'll get a "thank you"...read it with a bad attitude and you get what we see often, complaints of "getting flamed" for the wrong set up or an elitist attitude...the latter of which would be taking the same good info and making it something negative, which the poster never intended.

The same post that one sees as very helpful, is often viewed by others quite different, and its completely out of control of the original poster how the post will be read.

Reactions: Like 3


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## Ellenantula (Mar 23, 2015)

WindedFatnNasty said:


> I almost feel like questions like this should be ignored because I feel like these posts do more harm than good. When someone asks a question like this I'm almost certain they have already made up their mind on how they feel about it.


I took the original question and following upset, as a typical newbie misunderstanding. I read it that OP had a preconceived notion that handling was fine, but OP just wanted to know if handling could be done safely at sling stage or if you have to wait for it to grow up.  OP probably read other sites and saw a few youtube videos.
Innocent-like.  
And OP probably had absolutely no expectation that anyone might dispute their own originally understood premise, as a fact, that handling is fine.  They weren't even asking about handling in general -- that was already assumed okay -- they were making sure it was okay to start handling when Ts are still slings.  
Imagine their utter surprise that this forum had such a large anti-handling committee to greet them.  

Yeah, some people would respond "Wow -- you guys don't hold yours at all?" and some "Stop flaming me, I'm outta here!"

More newbies than you may realize might let the newly forum shared ideas marinate a bit, maybe do some more reading/research, and possibly come to share same view of non-handling later, when the initial shock or anger passes.
And some are just losers.  j/k :laugh:

Reactions: Like 2


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## cold blood (Mar 24, 2015)

god61021 said:


> attacks on peoples character only anger them they do NOT convince them that you are right.
> Those are the posts I take issue with.


I don't think there's much disagreement here....BUT, that didn't even come close to occurring here.  And in the rare cases where it does, its as simple as reporting the offending post to the mods...that kind of thing is against the rules/policy of AB and mods will take care of it, and even dish out penalties to those offending or close the thread.  Don't fight back and get into it with someone, just report the post, simple as that.  Its amazing how fast things like that go away or stop once the mods step in.


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## Angel Minkov (Mar 24, 2015)

Can't this thread be summed up with "if you want to hold something and play with it, get a cat, because if a cat bites you at least all of our own be taken because of you" LOL

Reactions: Like 1


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## gobey (Mar 24, 2015)

Can I jusy say I don't know where I'd be in this hobby without each and every one of you guys? Especially the forum vets and regulars?

Now I also believe threads like these or "should I get an OBT as a 2nd tarantula?" are usually posts where somebody has made up their minds. Some probably know they're going to start an argument.

Me, I have gained so much from the fact that you all weigh in on anything and everything I ask with honesty. No I don't always like what I hear. No I don't always do what person X recommended. But I took that info into consideration and processed and stored it to reflect and remember.

It's good to have the Cold Bloods and the Poec54s and the mods like Advan come in and weigh in. The personalities and styles and experience all meshes together well to give you a well rounded perspective to decide for yourself.

I'll never get offended by anybody here. I'm keeping my tarantulas. I love them and this world. So I'm sticking around. The most I can do is continue to converse respectfully about my journey with the others here... And not give advice I'm not qualified to give to anybody. And continue to come here to share my experiences and seek information and have questions answered.

I reccomend everybody chill out. And listen to what's being said. Then decide.

Anybody here like tarantulas?

Reactions: Like 4


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## cold blood (Mar 24, 2015)

gobey said:


> Anybody here like tarantulas?


Ooooh! I do I do!!! :3: :clap:

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## Blueandbluer (Mar 24, 2015)

gobey said:


> I reccomend everybody chill out. And listen to what's being said. Then decide.
> 
> Anybody here like tarantulas?


I have to laugh a minute, though, because this thread has died like 4 times now and then someone comes in and expresses another opinion -- like this one -- and the scab is off again! :laugh:

IOW: Dude, we HAD chilled. You missed both the heating up and chilling down, son.

Reactions: Like 1


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## gobey (Mar 24, 2015)

Blueandbluer said:


> I have to laugh a minute, though, because this thread has died like 4 times now and then someone comes in and expresses another opinion -- like this one -- and the scab is off again! :laugh:
> 
> IOW: Dude, we HAD chilled. You missed both the heating up and chilling down, son.


Things looked unsettled. Jimmies seemed rustled.

Really all I wanted to say was I luv you guyz!

Reactions: Like 1


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## Blueandbluer (Mar 25, 2015)

gobey said:


> Things looked unsettled. Jimmies seemed rustled.
> 
> Really all I wanted to say was I luv you guyz!


Awww, kisskiss.

Reactions: Like 1


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## lalberts9310 (Mar 25, 2015)

gobey said:


> Things looked unsettled. Jimmies seemed rustled.
> 
> Really all I wanted to say was I luv you guyz!


Naaaaaawww!! :giggle: you're so sweet! It makes my heart melt, hehehe

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## scott99 (Mar 25, 2015)

this thread needs to stop:wall:

Reactions: Like 1


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