still arachnophobic :(

[bianca97]

I’ve been wanting to get a pet tarantula for a loong time and I’ve been reading so much about them, watching videos and learning about them for months.. but I still feel the fear when I see a small random spider or sometimes even when I watch a video I’m really sad about it, because I think they are beautiful, interesting and cute... I guess I’m scared I’m gonna feel negatively if I get a tarantula, and I don’t want that..
do you have any tips for me or do I just need to grow a pair and start handling random spiders? I don’t know anyone who owns tarantulas, I’ve only seen them in a zoo :/

 

[TriMac33]

I’ve been wanting to get a pet tarantula for a loong time and I’ve been reading so much about them, watching videos and learning about them for months.. but I still feel the fear when I see a small random spider or sometimes even when I watch a video I’m really sad about it, because I think they are beautiful, interesting and cute... I guess I’m scared I’m gonna feel negatively if I get a tarantula, and I don’t want that..
do you have any tips for me or do I just need to grow a pair and start handling random spiders? I don’t know anyone who owns tarantulas, I’ve only seen them in a zoo :/

I wouldn't start by just handling random spiders, and if you do get a tarantula, you shouldn't be handling it at all. If this is something you really want to get into, you have to be prepared to care long term for the animal. You need to know their species specific husbandry, the differences between New World and Old World species, and their feeding requirements. A good way to start is by lurking these boards for information before deciding on a tarantula.

 

[Chris LXXIX]

or do I just need to grow a pair and start handling random spiders?

Yes, handling "random spiders" is always an amazing idea, no doubts about. No doubts

:/

Lovely and underrated

 

[Vanessa]

Don't take this the wrong way, but, if you are really that terrified of them, then why are you so set on having one? I get that some people are a bit arachnophobic and use them to get over their fear, but I've not heard of someone so much so that they get upset by watching videos even. You might want to rethink getting one. That level of fear could interfere with you being able to properly care for them.

 

[BasedGod]

I don't recommend handling one cause I don't want you to freak out and drop it. Just go visit someone with a tarantula and see if you really want to own one.

 

[TriMac33]

I actually agree with Vanessa. I wasn't sure how to word it without coming off as rude, but it is true, this hobby isn't for the faint of heart. Any T can prove unpredictable and a keeper can find themselves in uncertain situations. Having severe arachnophobia, as it seems you do, I would also worry the spiders overall welfare could be hindered by your fear.

 

[bianca97]

Don't take this the wrong way, but, if you are really that terrified of them, then why are you so set on having one? I get that some people are a bit arachnophobic and use them to get over their fear, but I've not heard of someone so much so that they get upset by watching videos even. You might want to rethink getting one. That level of fear could interfere with you being able to properly care for them.

Don't take this the wrong way, but, if you are really that terrified of them, then why are you so set on having one? I get that some people are a bit arachnophobic and use them to get over their fear, but I've not heard of someone so much so that they get upset by watching videos even. You might want to rethink getting one. That level of fear could interfere with you being able to properly care for them.

Thanks, I will not get one until I’m sure I can take proper care of it. I don’t want to get one just to get over my fear, I just generally find them interesting and I do think they are lovely! I’ll just keep learning about them for now

 

[AlexWae]

I understand you..
I'm not arachnophobic, but i would always have tried not getting in contact with spiders. And on the other hand, i have been fascinated with the beauty.. especially after seeing how colorful tarantulas are..
After years of research and contemplating, i finally decided to get one..
But i did so with the right mindset.. never handle and always respect them..
If you want to get one, just cause handling seems cool, that's a bad way to start..

 

[Burak Toprak]

I’ve been wanting to get a pet tarantula for a loong time and I’ve been reading so much about them, watching videos and learning about them for months.. but I still feel the fear when I see a small random spider or sometimes even when I watch a video I’m really sad about it, because I think they are beautiful, interesting and cute... I guess I’m scared I’m gonna feel negatively if I get a tarantula, and I don’t want that..
do you have any tips for me or do I just need to grow a pair and start handling random spiders? I don’t know anyone who owns tarantulas, I’ve only seen them in a zoo :/

I was actually really scared of spider so I did the only logical thing and bought a massive one without really knowing much about them which was a mistake on my part.; but It really helped me out now I love them and I've only had a T for 2 months (getting 2 more soon). You shouldn't handle them but just having it near you constantly will help you get over your fear. Just take a leap of faith, read up on the guides here get a proper enclosure and then buy it (You gotta be 100% about it though). I got a pink toed tarantula which I would recommend. They are easy to find, cheap and extremely inexpensive to take care of. Just a heads up if you do buy it be ready to have it for a long time and if you get it from a big chain like petsmart or petco ignore everything they tell you to do because 99% of the information they give you is wrong which I discovered when I got on here. If you have any questions about keeping a healthy T there are so many people to help you on these forms.

 

[Brachyfan]

I would like to share my story and respectfully disagree with @TriMac33 and @Vanessa on some points just due to my experience.

I was extremely arachnophobic when I was very young. Couldn't even look at pictures without having an anxiety attack

I had a teachers aid in grade 4 who kept a Brachypelma smithi in the teachers lounge at school. He found out that I was terrified of spiders and especially tarantulas. Don't know why he took it upon himself to "cure" me but he took me into the lounge and showed me the t. I was honestly repulsed! But fascinated at the same time. Here was the scariest animal I had ever seen right in front of me! And it was small (3") and very fuzzy. The tv made it out to be this giant animal that would kill me. Looking at one in real life was kinda game changing.

Next day I asked to see it again and they let me eat lunch in the lounge again and I watched that t more close up this time. Over the next week I did this everyday. And that is when things changed for me.

I asked if it could come out of the enclosure. He said "No. They are very fragile and if it fell it would pop like a balloon" . At that point my fear just dissipated. I actually got banned from the teacher's lounge after a month because I would sneak in there to check on it

And that was the end of my tarantulaphobia! I still get freaked out by funnel webs and widows a bit. And had a flare up at a zoo once when a king babboon caught me off guard and threat postured at me unexpectedly. But overall my fear was gone.

Fast forward 30 years and I was taking my first steps in the hobby. I was exactly where @bianca97 is at today. Watching every video and researching. I was not at all sure if I would relapse or not having to care for one. An expo was going on one weekend and I went down there. Said I might buy one and spent an hour talking to awesome people that helped me out. I took the plunge that day with a little sling 21 tarantulas over 16 species and haven't looked back. Now I am moving into intermediate species.

The point in time that I knew I was ready was when I was watching a lot of exotic's lair on my big screen. I would fall asleep to that and wake up to it too! Waking up to threat postures and stridulating old world lol! The realization that a 3.5 foot t on the screen wasn't so bad so the fact that the real Ts are MUCH smaller pushed me to get one. And I am happy I did. And all thanks to that little smithi from grade 4!

Don't know if you are ready yet but seems tou are following a similar path. If you are serious about wanting to get a t... you will know when you are ready

PS before I get raked over the coals for talking about Exotic's Lair I would like to say that I don't look to him for husbandry. Great place to watch crazy defensive Ts though

 

[TriMac33]

I would like to share my story and respectfully disagree with @TriMac33 and @Vanessa on some points just due to my experience.

I was extremely arachnophobic when I was very young. Couldn't even look at pictures without having an anxiety attack

I had a teachers aid in grade 4 who kept a Brachypelma smithi in the teachers lounge at school. He found out that I was terrified of spiders and especially tarantulas. Don't know why he took it upon himself to "cure" me but he took me into the lounge and showed me the t. I was honestly repulsed! But fascinated at the same time. Here was the scariest animal I had ever seen right in front of me! And it was small (3") and very fuzzy. The tv made it out to be this giant animal that would kill me. Looking at one in real life was kinda game changing.

Next day I asked to see it again and they let me eat lunch in the lounge again and I watched that t more close up this time. Over the next week I did this everyday. And that is when things changed for me.

I asked if it could come out of the enclosure. He said "No. They are very fragile and if it fell it would pop like a balloon" . At that point my fear just dissipated. I actually got banned from the teacher's lounge after a month because I would sneak in there to check on it

And that was the end of my tarantulaphobia! I still get freaked out by funnel webs and widows a bit. And had a flare up at a zoo once when a king babboon caught me off guard and threat postured at me unexpectedly. But overall my fear was gone.

Fast forward 30 years and I was taking my first steps in the hobby. I was exactly where @bianca97 is at today. Watching every video and researching. I was not at all sure if I would relapse or not having to care for one. An expo was going on one weekend and I went down there. Said I might buy one and spent an hour talking to awesome people that helped me out. I took the plunge that day with a little sling 21 tarantulas over 16 species and haven't looked back. Now I am moving into intermediate species.

The point in time that I knew I was ready was when I was watching a lot of exotic's lair on my big screen. I would fall asleep to that and wake up to it too! Waking up to threat postures and stridulating old world lol! The realization that a 3.5 foot t on the screen wasn't so bad so the fact that the real Ts are MUCH smaller pushed me to get one. And I am happy I did. And all thanks to that little smithi from grade 4!

Don't know if you are ready yet but seems tou are following a similar path. If you are serious about wanting to get a t... you will know when you are ready

PS before I get raked over the coals for talking about Exotic's Lair I would like to say that I don't look to him for husbandry. Great place to watch crazy defensive Ts though

That's a really sweet story. You're lucky events played out for you the way they did and brought you to where you are today. Where I come from in terms of discouraging the OP from taking the plunge is simply how many people I see on here on a daily basis, who went and got themselves a T to "overcome" their arachnophobia, without any accurate knowledge on how to care for it. It also seems like you had gotten over a great deal of your fear already before actually keeping Ts as pets. I would atleast advise the OP to do extensive research first, watch Tom Moran, and maybe attend an expo or two before buying one.

PS before I get raked over the coals for talking about Exotic's Lair I would like to say that I don't look to him for husbandry. Great place to watch crazy defensive Ts though

Oh, and I totally watch him too. For entertainment purposes

 

[Vanessa]

If your fear is so intense that you get freaked out by watching videos, let alone being face to face with one coming towards you when you open the lid to their enclosure, or swinging around to catch the tongs when you try to take their water dish out, then you might want to rethink getting one. It is extremely easy to kill them with a misplaced lid or thrown tongs.
There are two types of dislike of spiders and I have seen hundreds of examples of both in the years of volunteering at expos that I've done. They are dead easy to spot when you have seen enough examples of both.
There are those people who have been brought up to hate and fear spiders, but who have never actually encountered one up close and personal. And they've certainly never encountered someone advocating for them and spreading love for them. Those people are very often turned around with education and exposure, because what they're suffering from isn't really a phobia at all - they're just misinformed and have been taught to hate spiders. And what has been taught can be untaught.
Then, there are those people who are truly phobic and who have difficulty having any exposure to them at all - even photos and videos. Those people are not going to be cured of their phobia by living with a giant spider who comes towards them for feeding and attacks the tongs during maintenance. They might never be cured of their phobia by proper, qualified, psychiatric help. Putting either of them - the person or the spider - into that scenario isn't in the best interest of either party.

 

[Pauli]

@bianca97 Maybe you would benefit from thinking about other inverts, given your arachnophobia? I have a friend who is PETRIFIED by spiders of all sizes, but utterly fascinated by scorpions. There’s a whole world of centipedes and mantises (manti?) and all kinds of things that would give my mom the heebie jeebies, all of which are incredibly interesting.
That said, tarantulas are way more interesting and lots prettier.

 

[Brachyfan]

If your fear is so intense that you get freaked out by watching videos, let alone being face to face with one coming towards you when you open the lid to their enclosure, or swinging around to catch the tongs when you try to take their water dish out, then you might want to rethink getting one. It is extremely easy to kill them with a misplaced lid or thrown tongs.
There are two types of dislike of spiders and I have seen hundreds of examples of both in the years of volunteering at expos that I've done. They are dead easy to spot when you have seen enough examples of both.
There are those people who have been brought up to hate and fear spiders, but who have never actually encountered one up close and personal. And they've certainly never encountered someone advocating for them and spreading love for them. Those people are very often turned around with education and exposure, because what they're suffering from isn't really a phobia at all - they're just misinformed and have been taught to hate spiders. And what has been taught can be untaught.
Then, there are those people who are truly phobic and who have difficulty having any exposure to them at all - even photos and videos. Those people are not going to be cured of their phobia by living with a giant spider who comes towards them for feeding and attacks the tongs during maintenance. They might never be cured of their phobia by proper, qualified, psychiatric help. Putting either of them - the person or the spider - into that scenario isn't in the best interest of either party.

I definitely agree with these points. Some should never have pets like this and it comes down to this in my opinion. If you are creeped out by tarantulas you can probably overcome it. If the phobia cripples you I wouldn't recommend having one. If your concern is that your husbandry may hurt the t then researching is your best bet. If you are really scared of being bitten then they probably aren't for you. I have never worried about this...only that my spiders get the best care I can give them.

I shared my story to show that you can overcome extreme fear and eventually be at peace with them. Another parallel to this for me was with sharks (my all time favorite animal). Exactly the same path taken.

 

[NYAN]

do you have any tips for me or do I just need to grow a pair and start handling random spiders?/

Observe the wild true spiders. If you feel comfortable, let them walk on you also. Next step would be to keep one as a pet for a period of time. Don’t go out and get something that you would need to care for until you feel comfortable that you can do that. Wild spiders would be a good way to help expose yourself to your fear.

The people who are against handling have reason to be for tarantulas because there can be injuries or bites. Small true spiders are very unlikely to get injured if they fall.