Scared of my tarantula now and could use advice

Kendricks

Arachnoknight
Joined
Jan 18, 2017
Messages
153
Well if you are so scared by a B.albopilosum (suggested always as the perfect beginner one) then you should quit, ain't joking. Ask for someone living nearby you for a local pick up, as an option.
I think that's a bit over the top.
Would advice to just take a breath and stick with it. Confidence comes with experience, the OP just needs a bit more time.

There's no issue here.
 

Chris LXXIX

ArachnoGod
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Dec 25, 2014
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5,841
I think that's a bit over the top.
Would advice to just take a breath and stick with it. Confidence comes with experience, the OP just needs a bit more time.

There's no issue here.
I stick with what I've said. If he's so scared, then it's better to quit. And there's nothing absolutely bad about in such a choice, IMO.

Sooner or later, T's needs to be 'catch cupped', for various reasons. While no one deny how much important are experience and the confidence gained trough that, fear is a too much personal feeling for being debated... if he's scared, well, he's scared, and no Internet Forum advice/s (not even from this one, probably the best at a worldwide level on the subject) nor hundreds of YT videos, can overcome personal fears.

Only him can.
 

Kendricks

Arachnoknight
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Jan 18, 2017
Messages
153
But how do we measure fear? And when is it too much?
And how can he overcome it, if he doesn't challenge it?

That's why he should stick with it. Even if he has to catch cup it, nothing says he can't do it, only that he will be afraid.
That will only get easier with practice.

Why should he immediately give it away?
What would happen if he keeps it?
He might be scared during maintenance... so what?
It's just a spider, and with time OP will realize this.
 

Chris LXXIX

ArachnoGod
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Dec 25, 2014
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5,841
But how do we measure fear? And when is it too much?
That's why I've said that 'fear' is a too much personal feeling for being debated - aside normal, general debates.

My advice was a honest and direct one: if he's (really) that scared, then... it's scared, and quit would be the best, fast, and reasonable option for him, the spider and whatnot.

Obviously, only he can try to overcome his fears, for that there's no advice or whatever really helpful.

I know a couple of people really scared of driving, and they have the driving license and years of experience. Yet they are scared, it's a 'mind block'. Only those folks can overcome that fear.
 

sasker

Arachnoprince
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Oct 9, 2016
Messages
1,088
And how can he overcome it, if he doesn't challenge it?
I totally agree. Many tarantula keepers were once afraid of spiders, or felt intimidated or at least uncomfortable about their spiders. How many people would keep OW tarantulas if no-one would ever step outside his comfort zone? The reward of challenging one's fears could be freedom of this fear.

That's why I've said that 'fear' is a too much personal feeling for being debated
Indeed, that's why I am reluctant to advise OP to either keep or get rid of the spider. I think it is better to urge the person with arachnophobia not to make a decision based on emotions. Count to ten, and then decide. I don't want to start the debate about what arachnophobia is exactly. Some say you don't have it if you don't start hyperventilating when thinking of spiders, or whatever. But I feel that fear of spiders is a personal matter, as is the willingness to face one's fear and the resolve to overcome it. A friend of mine literally got goosebumps when I told him I have tarantulas and he only wanted to come over after I promised to move the enclosures to the bedroom. He'd rather keep his fear than to go through the difficult process of ridding himself of his arachnophobia. That's his choice. I preferred to face it and I am now the happy owner of a dozen tarantulas :)
 

Trincess

Arachnopeon
Joined
Apr 1, 2018
Messages
15
Tarantulas would not be any fun if they didn't do stuff like that. My son got given a major threat pose by my a geniculata when he touched it with tongs. He thought it was hilariously funny :D
 

sdeveikis

Arachnopeon
Joined
Jan 10, 2018
Messages
27
Any help is greatly appreciated. She's a feisty one.
OP, I feel you on this as almost the exact same thing happened to me. My first T was a g. rosea that I actually purchased because of a scavenger hunt: the item was to face your fears, so I bought one for the SOLE PURPOSE of putting on my face to take a picture (something I would NEVER do today, but ah, the joys of being dumb, ignorant, and irresponsible). But yes, she was extremely calm and docile; she walked all over my face and body without any issue, she just took her sweet time and slowly crawled all over me. Fast forward to a couple weeks later, I was trying to change out her water dish and a couple strands of my hair were hanging in the tank and accidentally brushed her abdomen, and with speed I had never seen before, she whipped around, JUMPED and latched onto my hair. I don't think I had ever experienced a moment of terror like that before in my life, and after that, I became terrified of her. Changing out her water (that she loved to muddy up with substrate) became an exercise in terror for me that would require hyping myself up for literally ten minutes beforehand, and making sure that she was as far away as possible from the water dish because I kept (irrationally) telling myself that she was gonna jump out and get me.

Fast forward to today, I now have ten tarantulas, and I couldn't love them more. I am so fascinated with watching them grow and learning about their (often very weird) behavior, and I wouldn't get rid of them for anything. With regards to getting over your (newly developed) fear, the only thing I could recommend is to just take it very slowly and give it time. I remember for weeks after the latching-onto-hair experience I had, I would often just sit and watch Misha (the rosie) for 20 or 30 minutes at a time, where she often didn't move an inch, and soon enough it was like, "why am I scared of this rock, again??" Having a close call with any tarantula, regardless of its expected temperament, is often enough to scare people from the hobby, but please don't let it if you have a genuine interest in them! Spending time here on arachnoboards is also really helpful with getting over it; it's a comforting feeling being surrounded by people who are extremely passionate and knowledgeable about their inverts, who are willing to share their experiences with you. Obviously, you know yourself best and it's not anyone's place to say whether you should stay in the hobby, but you seem to have put the work into properly researching husbandry and you have a genuine interest in tarantulas. I'm just throwing my two cents in about my personal experience with a close call and how it spooked me!
 

cold blood

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That's why he should stick with it. Even if he has to catch cup it, nothing says he can't do it, only that he will be afraid.
That will only get easier with practice.
I completely agree...its like many other things in life.

The first time riding a bike as a child without using training wheels...afraid...stuck with it and ended up liking biking.

First time I learned how to drive a manual...get me on a hill, stopped around a lot of other cars and I almost had panic attacks...but after a while I didn't notice, learned to really really enjoy a manual and got really darn good at it with practice.

First time I faced a "real" fastball...I was so afraid of being plunked...stuck with it and soon I was drilling that same pitch all over the field.

First few times I went cliff jumping...totally and completely scared for my life (I have a fear of heights...or more accurately, falling onto hard surfaces)...in time, it became a very enjoyable activity.

Getting used to things and developing a familiarity often gets one past initial fears, especially if one understands those fears are probably over-blown and one has the desire.

Starting with ts is hardly different...at first many things make a new keeper jump...but in time we are able to reel in those gut reactions and train ourselves to stay calm and not react...or even giggle sometimes.

Some get over these fears quickly, others need a lot more time and simply need to take things at a much slower pace, and there's nothing wrong with that.
 
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Whitelightning777

Arachno-heretic
Joined
Feb 9, 2017
Messages
399
First of all, it's just a feeding response. That's why you use tongs not your hands. If that's a concern, get longer tongs. Don't get rid of your tarantula!!

Second, I find is best to use a paint brush with soft bristles to nudge a tarantula. They are by far less likely to mistake it for food or a predator.

Third, the slower you move, the slower the tarantula moves. Don't tap a tarantula like taking someone on the shoulder, bad move. Gently and slowly nudge or push it the direction you want it to go from the side against the leg. Never push straight down or compress the spider.

Fourth, you don't have to open an enclosure when the spider is misbehaving like that. Curly hairs are terrestrial and most likely will return to the ground at some point, but nudging the tarantula with a paint brush works. Use the bristles not the tip of the handle.

(This is not true with arboreal species such as Avics. Those guys will remain stationary in the web tubes.)

If you follow these suggestions, it'll probably never happen again.


Note, this is how I use the tongs. Notice that they are never within easy reach of the T.
 
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Andrea82

Arachnoemperor
Joined
Jan 12, 2016
Messages
3,685
First of all, it's just a feeding response. That's why you use tongs not your hands. If that's a concern, get longer tongs. Don't get rid of your tarantula!!

Second, I find is best to use a paint brush with soft bristles to nudge a tarantula. They are by far less likely to mistake it for food or a predator.

Third, the slower you move, the slower the tarantula moves. Don't tap a tarantula like taking someone on the shoulder, bad move. Gently and slowly nudge or push it the direction you want it to go from the side against the leg. Never push straight down or compress the spider.

Fourth, you don't have to open an enclosure when the spider is misbehaving like that. Curly hairs are terrestrial and most likely will return to the ground at some point, but nudging the tarantula with a paint brush works. Use the bristles not the tip of the handle.

(This is not true with arboreal species such as Avics. Those guys will remain stationary in the web tubes.)

If you follow these suggestions, it'll probably never happen again.
'when the spider is misbehaving like that'
:rofl:
''Now you listen here B.albopilosum, behave or you're going to bed without your dinner!'
:D
 

Paul1126

Arachnoangel
Joined
Jun 14, 2017
Messages
817
Why are you using tongs to feed? There's zero need for this.
What's wrong with using tongs? I use tongs all the time, to pick up prey and drop them in.
I use tongs to pick up remains, scrape poop off the enclosure walls and to pick water dishes up for cleaning.

You're not going to avoid hungry spiders feeding responses.
Unless you place a catch cup over the top of them when doing maintenance.
 

Ungoliant

Malleus Aranearum
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What's wrong with using tongs? I use tongs all the time, to pick up prey and drop them in.
It's the difference between using tongs to drop prey in (which many of us do) and using tongs to hand the prey to the tarantula, so that it takes the prey off the tongs.

I usually try to avoid tong-feeding, because I'm concerned that the tarantula may break her fangs if she strikes the tongs instead of the prey. However, that concern may be overblown, as I have several that will strike at tongs when I am doing maintenance.
 

Paul1126

Arachnoangel
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817
It's the difference between using tongs to drop prey in (which many of us do) and using tongs to hand the prey to the tarantula, so that it takes the prey off the tongs.
My point is, it doesn't matter if you tong feed or not, every single person that owns a tarantula and does maintenance is going to have at least one of them mistake the tongs for food.
Telling someone they should sell their tarantula because they got a shock is just being rude.
 

Vanessa

Grammostola Groupie
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Mar 12, 2016
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As many people have already suggested, it was a feeding response. Brachypelma albopilosum are always hungry little tykes. I would suggest that you stick with it, because you will eventually become accustomed to their behaviour. It is part of the learning process and it doesn't take that long overall. I have been taken off guard with some of mine during feeding and it becomes easier to react to as time goes on.
I use a vial to feed my guys. I scoop the cricket up in the vial and I drop it into the enclosure. This works especially well for pin-heads who are easily crushed, but I do it for all sized crickets. It is very rare that I use tongs to hold the crickets at all.
 

Michael bradley

Arachnopeon
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Dec 4, 2017
Messages
36
I got my curlhair almost 2 months ago. It was an unsexed maybe 3-3 1/2 inch T. She molted and I sexed her as a female. She has been a really cool pet. However recently, when feeding and replacing water I tried to touch her very gently with the tongs as she was on the side of the kritter keeper and very close to the top. She immediately bit the tongs and bolted back down to the substrate.

This freaked me out a lot, I expected her to hopefully move down to the substrate. Even if she felt threatened I would have expected hairs instead or maybe a threat posture. She has only flicked hairs. I do get how they are nearly blind and deaf so getting touched all of a sudden isn't fun.

I am now kind of afraid of her. She is my 1st and only tarantula. I have done so much research and watch so many videos from many youtubers just about tarantulas as I find them cool. I used to be a VERY serious arachnophobe. Now I am kind of deciding if I should sell her and get out of the hobby. I know a bite from a curly hair isn't serious, I know Ts especially beginner species tend to calm down as they get bigger or full grown size, she is around 4 inches.

I was wondering if any of you have had experience with this or any advice. Even if I would want to sell her and get out of the hobby, I am scared of transferring her out of the kritter keeper into a temporary deli cup with holes. I don't even know how I would sell her, I got her at my local expo that runs every single month. Obviously I can't have my own booth, so not sure what to do. Would I talk to the people that sold it and ask for money for her?

Before I was considering getting some more Ts like a pinktoe and a GBB(my favorite), didn't think I would even consider more dangerous species, or get 10s of Ts like many do as they are literally the easiest pet to care for.

Any help is greatly appreciated. She's a feisty one.
My say would be best to prob let someone take her who ain’t scared of her... you being scared of her could end up hurting her if say next time your cleaning out her home and she mistakes tongs for food then your reaction is to jump, worse case is injured or dead t.. you shouldn’t be scared of your pet, should respect what they are and capable of doing.. all mine have good days and bad days, like humans really haha but certainly not scared of them..

But how do we measure fear? And when is it too much?
And how can he overcome it, if he doesn't challenge it?

That's why he should stick with it. Even if he has to catch cup it, nothing says he can't do it, only that he will be afraid.
That will only get easier with practice.

Why should he immediately give it away?
What would happen if he keeps it?
He might be scared during maintenance... so what?
It's just a spider, and with time OP will realize this.
Gotta disagree here as your playing roulette with a tarantulas life here..
 
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cold blood

Moderator
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Tong feeding is so obviously different. What you describe is inadvertant...tong feeding is intentional.
 

sasker

Arachnoprince
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Oct 9, 2016
Messages
1,088
Gotta disagree here as your playing roulette with a tarantulas life here..
Not necessarily. I agree that having panic attacks around your tarantulas is not something you want, but having adrenaline rushing through your veins (for example, when you are rehousing a fast OW) does not necessarily mean that you will make a mistake that could cost the life of your spider. Being prepared and reducing your risk with properly developed work methods will get you a long way. I think many keepers felt some fear for their spiders in the beginning, but this disappears over time.
 

Michael bradley

Arachnopeon
Joined
Dec 4, 2017
Messages
36
Not necessarily. I agree that having panic attacks around your tarantulas is not something you want, but having adrenaline rushing through your veins (for example, when you are rehousing a fast OW) does not necessarily mean that you will make a mistake that could cost the life of your spider. Being prepared and reducing your risk with properly developed work methods will get you a long way. I think many keepers felt some fear for their spiders in the beginning, but this disappears over time.
Still think being scared of your tarantula is a big mistake for the t.. I hear what your saying but your mentioning ow, I know you ain’t silly and know albopilosum is a nw and completely different.. everyone got there opinion and I respect yours but for me personally don’t think keeping a living pet of any kind that your scared of is a good choice.. cautious yes.. scared no
 
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