- Joined
- Aug 8, 2005
- Messages
- 11,498
Driving home this AM I encounter something slightly unusual. A chunky, powerful billy has decided to see the world and is trotting down the middle of the road. (Shows just how rural this area is). The owner, a tiny frail old man catches up with the billy but it's a pretty evenly matched contest.
Next, a van coming the other way. Following the general rule of not talking on the cellphone while in a rattle snake area, his morning drive and chat is goat disrupted and he puts his van in a ditch.
Meanwhile, a helpful bystander tries to assist the goatowner and discovers the second rule of goat handling: never put your head anywhere near those horns. (Right behind the golden rule of never turn your back on a goat). He gets sporked on the side of the head hard enough to make him sit down in the middle of the road to pursue ouch.
I enter the rodeo. I check on the sporked guy then move him to the van in the ditch guy following the old rule of keeping your morons in one basket. I then turn my attentions to the billy and owner which were making slow but steady progress towards Singapore.
It was then that I had my brilliant idea. Grabbing the IRD tow cable (Idiot/Improvised Rescue Device) I tossed a loop over the billy's horns and hooked the other end to the pintle hook figuring roughly that if it can tow a light artillery piece it won't have too much trouble with an obstinate billy. Getting the owner in the jeep it was simplicity itself to get the billy back to his corral.
The moral is obvious. If you are planning on going into serious goat keeping, get a jeep or tractor and keep a 2 ton tow cable handy.
Next, a van coming the other way. Following the general rule of not talking on the cellphone while in a rattle snake area, his morning drive and chat is goat disrupted and he puts his van in a ditch.
Meanwhile, a helpful bystander tries to assist the goatowner and discovers the second rule of goat handling: never put your head anywhere near those horns. (Right behind the golden rule of never turn your back on a goat). He gets sporked on the side of the head hard enough to make him sit down in the middle of the road to pursue ouch.
I enter the rodeo. I check on the sporked guy then move him to the van in the ditch guy following the old rule of keeping your morons in one basket. I then turn my attentions to the billy and owner which were making slow but steady progress towards Singapore.
It was then that I had my brilliant idea. Grabbing the IRD tow cable (Idiot/Improvised Rescue Device) I tossed a loop over the billy's horns and hooked the other end to the pintle hook figuring roughly that if it can tow a light artillery piece it won't have too much trouble with an obstinate billy. Getting the owner in the jeep it was simplicity itself to get the billy back to his corral.
The moral is obvious. If you are planning on going into serious goat keeping, get a jeep or tractor and keep a 2 ton tow cable handy.
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