How do you feel about giving unsolicited advice, and how would you approach it?

[Spoodfood]

I see a lot of things on Instagram, the only social media I’m really on, that I want to say something about. Just now I saw a T. albo in an exo terra tall on the side of the enclosure with about 2” of wood chip substrate, and they said in the description it was “climbing the wall because the enclosure still smelled like cleaning agent” I wanted to freak out, but didn’t say anything. How do you approach things like this? It’s giving me anxiety just looking at it. What do you do when you see a blatantly dangerous situation for a tarantula, but they didn’t ask for advice? I’m trying not to give any unsolicited advice but I’m having a hard time.

This is the post with the name left out, just so you all know I can’t make this up

 

[Mr E]

Just post the advice. If they care for their spider they'll probably listen.

 

[Spoodfood]

Just post the advice. If they care for their spider they'll probably listen.

I just don’t want to be, you know, THAT guy

 

[Matt Man]

why I stay off social media for Ts. (and many other things)
you already are 'the guy' (see other post) embrace it, your advice is good. If they get their panties in a bunch move on

 

[Mr E]

I'd rather be that "Annoying bussybody" than leave an animal in bad conditions. Then again, I don't really care what others think about me.

 

[vicareux]

I once saw a guy on instagram keep his T in a cage. Literal bird cage. My comments were ignored.
Some instagram keepers are also freaking out over people giving them advice they didn't ask for. "I get that you're trying to help me, but i did NOT ask for advice".
So social media are mostly a miss when it comes to advice. I'm just there to upload photos, i unfollow people whose photos i can't stand (Handling T's , weird communals, bad enclosures etc)

 

[viper69]

I see a lot of things on Instagram, the only social media I’m really on, that I want to say something about. Just now I saw a T. albo in an exo terra tall on the side of the enclosure with about 2” of wood chip substrate, and they said in the description it was “climbing the wall because the enclosure still smelled like cleaning agent” I wanted to freak out, but didn’t say anything. How do you approach things like this? It’s giving me anxiety just looking at it. What do you do when you see a blatantly dangerous situation for a tarantula, but they didn’t ask for advice? I’m trying not to give any unsolicited advice but I’m having a hard time.

This is the post with the name left out, just so you all know I can’t make this up View attachment 417479

One I don’t get emotional- I can’t control people’s behavior

Two Give advice! Be prepared to be told off

 

[Spoodfood]

I once saw a guy on instagram keep his T in a cage. Literal bird cage. My comments were ignored.
Some instagram keepers are also freaking out over people giving them advice they didn't ask for. "I get that you're trying to help me, but i did NOT ask for advice".
So social media are mostly a miss when it comes to advice. I'm just there to upload photos, i unfollow people whose photos i can't stand (Handling T's , weird communals, bad enclosures etc)

I only follow a select few, and I unfollow someone anytime I see things like that too. I just want to see nice photos of Ts and bugs, not anything that stresses me out. This post was made by someone on a hashtag I follow I do not follow the account lol

 

[Matt Man]

I only follow 2 T related people on SM, both are dealers / friends

see I'd be the guy "Your substrate is crap, and if you can still smell cleaning agent you are most likely poisoning your T. Oh, and the photo of yours shows how much of a death trap your enclosure is, that T falls back and hits that rock your next post will be "My
T is leaking fluid...."

 

[Pmurinushmacla]

Unsolicited advice is annoying when it doesn't help keep an animal/person safe. For example someone telling you ways to improve your skincare, what to eat to make you thinner or gain weight, all without you asking. However when an animal's wellbeing is at stake, it really doesn't matter. The better/friendlier you phrase it, the more likely they will be to listen.

 

[Spoodfood]

see I'd be the guy "Your substrate is crap, and if you can still smell cleaning agent you are most likely poisoning your T. Oh, and the photo of yours shows how much of a death trap your enclosure is, that T falls back and hits that rock your next post will be "My
T is leaking fluid...."

Believe me I want to, but I did message them and explain what was wrong in a nice way. Not because it’s okay that they did no research at all, but because they might actually listen if I don’t attack them lol

Unsolicited advice is annoying when it doesn't help keep an animal/person safe. For example someone telling you ways to improve your skincare, what to eat to make you thinner or gain weight, all without you asking. However when an animal's wellbeing is at stake, it really doesn't matter. The better/friendlier you phrase it, the more likely they will be to listen.

I messaged them instead of commenting and was as nice as I could be about it, hopefully that will make them more receptive.

 

[Pmurinushmacla]

I messaged them instead of commenting and was as nice as I could be about it, hopefully that will make them more receptive.

All you can do tbh, goodluck.

 

[Liquifin]

Pet owners should be responsible for learning proper information and care on their pets, whether they be cats, dogs, or even exotic pets. Ignoring advice as being rude or narcissistic is just themselves seeing/interpreting it differently. Talking to people on the internet is the wild west and some of them are just impossible to get through. If they didn't ask for advice and you give them advice, then they just see you as being interrupting/mean on the internet standards. I think offering advice is easier in-person then it is online but that's just me.

 

[Jonathan6303]

Post a video of their natural habitat and then carefully explain there errors

 

[Willuminati]

If you genuinely want to give a person advise don’t be subliminal, be straight forward send them a direct message and let them know you’re trying to help. All that extra stuff about posting a video or being indirect in comments can make novice keepers feel attacked.

 

[viper69]

Just be straight and direct. No need to sugar coat things. Peeps are adults not 3 yr olds!

They get defensive- so what they are an insecure person looking for validation of their own stupidity - move on

 

[nicodimus22]

I don't. It ends badly 100% of the time on a social level, and after hearing the information and then telling you to go **** yourself, they're still not going to change their care of the animal. So, I don't bother any more. It accomplishes nothing.

It sucks that most people think their feelings are more important than proper animal husbandry, but that's humans in a nutshell. Fragile little birds.

 

[viper69]

I don't. It ends badly 100% of the time on a social level, and after hearing the information and then telling you to go **** yourself, they're still not going to change their care of the animal. So, I don't bother any more. It accomplishes nothing.

It sucks that most people think their feelings are more important than proper animal husbandry, but that's humans in a nutshell. Fragile little birds.

Couldn’t agree more!!!!

 

[Timc]

Oy vey they still called it a Brachypelma. I mean, they at least learned an outdated name, don’t expect too much from them.

 

[Dry Desert]

I just don’t want to be, you know, THAT guy

Why not ?

I'm " That Guy " on here - doesn't bother me one bit.

Tell them your thoughts, give advice, if they come back " anti " then move on.

No amount of friendly advice will never make any difference to some - just seems to get their back up.

Do what you think is helpful, if it comes back harsh, move on.

DON'T take it personally.

Only typed words after all.