How can I get my parents to let me have a t ?
- Thread starter ryeguy28
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I was in the EXACT situation, my mom loves spiders, and my dad is terrifed of them. I'm just going to let you know, it took me 11 years to convince my parents to let me have one (their mistake, I'm getting number 10 soon 
) the most you can do is assure them you can take care of it, show them all of the good things about owning a tarantula:
1. they're very low maintence
2. they don't make noise.
3. food wise, couldn't be cheaper couple of crickets a week and your good to go.
4. they don't smell!
5. if it stays in your room, your dad should never have to see it! (Unless he's like my dad who comes in and purposefully looks at it, then shudders and makes "how gross" comments which kinda pisses me off)
6. depending on which species you chose, even the perchase of the acctual T won't be very expensive.
7. most tarantula bites are nothing to worry about. (show him the bite reports of the species you intend to get, personally i reccomend a B. smithi or an A. avicularia (or A. versicolor) )
8. do your reseatch (plenty and plenty of research) to make them understand that you know what you're doing, and what your getting into.
Or, if you dads anything like mine, suggest getting a scorpion instead. (my dad hates those even more, and finally he said, "alright, I won't mind a tarantula so much, just as long as you don't get any scorpions" )
) the most you can do is assure them you can take care of it, show them all of the good things about owning a tarantula:1. they're very low maintence
2. they don't make noise.
3. food wise, couldn't be cheaper couple of crickets a week and your good to go.
4. they don't smell!
5. if it stays in your room, your dad should never have to see it! (Unless he's like my dad who comes in and purposefully looks at it, then shudders and makes "how gross" comments which kinda pisses me off)
6. depending on which species you chose, even the perchase of the acctual T won't be very expensive.
7. most tarantula bites are nothing to worry about. (show him the bite reports of the species you intend to get, personally i reccomend a B. smithi or an A. avicularia (or A. versicolor) )
8. do your reseatch (plenty and plenty of research) to make them understand that you know what you're doing, and what your getting into.
Or, if you dads anything like mine, suggest getting a scorpion instead.
(my dad hates those even more, and finally he said, "alright, I won't mind a tarantula so much, just as long as you don't get any scorpions" )
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- Jan 17, 2009
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Welcome!
First question is: Who would be paying for the tarantula and the necessary housing? If you were planning on shelling out your own money, that could be a point to bring up to them. Doesn't take care of his fear issue, but parents generally like it when kids take responsibility instead of just begging, "Get this for me!" (Not saying you did that, of course.)
First question is: Who would be paying for the tarantula and the necessary housing? If you were planning on shelling out your own money, that could be a point to bring up to them. Doesn't take care of his fear issue, but parents generally like it when kids take responsibility instead of just begging, "Get this for me!" (Not saying you did that, of course.)
lilboyblu123
Arachnopeon
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- Apr 14, 2009
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the way i convinced my parents was i made a booklett! sounds stupid but it was pretty cool. I went to www.petbugs.com and printed off every care sheet and spent hours highliting important facts and favorite spicies.I took is every where to school, church, shopping. it took me two weeks of this to convince my parents to let my get my beautifal smithi. just let them know T's arnt just a phase your going through!!! good luck.
( tell your mom to have a talk with your dad, my mom can scare my dad and me into doing anything)
( tell your mom to have a talk with your dad, my mom can scare my dad and me into doing anything)
mattking164
Arachnopeon
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- Sep 25, 2009
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- 43
say to your dad that you want (something that he hates the most) like a rat or something and bug him about it and he should back down and say ok a tarantula. that what should happen lol.:clap:
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worked for me.
(Scorpions LOL. I want a scorpion too, but I wanted a tarantula more)
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- 613
LOL I wound up getting the rat instead, anyway, and my dad wound up divorcing my mom (OK, maybe not because of my rat, but it meant I could keep my rat and get more of them with my mom!!)
It took me moving out on my own, and years later before getting a T, despite really admiring them for years, and even owning T pet books (which seem bad and out of date now).
What usually works is the whole doing your own research thing. Take books out of the library, buy books, read and print out T information online, etc. Parents usually can't say no if they see their kids are learning and really taking an interest in it. Just remember, what are you going to do for college, etc? Cause some of these T's live for decades.
It took me moving out on my own, and years later before getting a T, despite really admiring them for years, and even owning T pet books (which seem bad and out of date now).
What usually works is the whole doing your own research thing. Take books out of the library, buy books, read and print out T information online, etc. Parents usually can't say no if they see their kids are learning and really taking an interest in it. Just remember, what are you going to do for college, etc? Cause some of these T's live for decades.
lol, same with me, different scenario.... my mom was at work, she hates venomous bugs ((scorpions and tarantulas and whatnot)) my dad took me to petco and i got all the things i needed so my mom just said "so why didn't you get your stupid scorpion yet?" since i got the stuff to set up the tank, but not the scorpion, so basically it was a "you got the stuff, might as well get the scorpion" and her two main concerns "what if it escapes?" i just said "i'll put a weight on the lid" "what if it stings your niece?" i just said "she's constantly crying anyway, it's nothing more than a bee sting, even than they use their claws more than their stinger" quite obviously the emperor, my dad threw in the lie "they de-venomize their scorpions." so... my solution is... search up what can blow down their concerns, and if possible have one parent take your side lolI was in the EXACT situation, my mom loves spiders, and my dad is terrifed of them. I'm just going to let you know, it took me 11 years to convince my parents to let me have one (their mistake, I'm getting number 10 soon
1. they're very low maintence
2. they don't make noise.
3. food wise, couldn't be cheaper couple of crickets a week and your good to go.
4. they don't smell!
5. if it stays in your room, your dad should never have to see it! (Unless he's like my dad who comes in and purposefully looks at it, then shudders and makes "how gross" comments which kinda pisses me off)
6. depending on which species you chose, even the perchase of the acctual T won't be very expensive.
7. most tarantula bites are nothing to worry about. (show him the bite reports of the species you intend to get, personally i reccomend a B. smithi or an A. avicularia (or A. versicolor) )
8. do your reseatch (plenty and plenty of research) to make them understand that you know what you're doing, and what your getting into.
Or, if you dads anything like mine, suggest getting a scorpion instead.
- Joined
- Jan 11, 2009
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- 4,092
I did things in my normal (stealthy) way when I got my first T lol
It was my birthday, so my dad took me to the pet store (as usual). I had been planning on getting some sort of creepy crawly, and when I saw a gorgeous juvie G. rosea.. I couldn't say no. My dad thought it was a pretty neat idea, so I got her.
My mum was NOT pleased in the slightest LOL but within a few days, she was asking questions, wanting to watch her eat, and telling me to bring her out whenever they had company over.
Sometimes asking and providing information only makes things harder... if you CAN get a parent on your side to just bring one home, that might help.
Maybe? LOL
It was my birthday, so my dad took me to the pet store (as usual). I had been planning on getting some sort of creepy crawly, and when I saw a gorgeous juvie G. rosea.. I couldn't say no. My dad thought it was a pretty neat idea, so I got her.
My mum was NOT pleased in the slightest LOL but within a few days, she was asking questions, wanting to watch her eat, and telling me to bring her out whenever they had company over.
Sometimes asking and providing information only makes things harder... if you CAN get a parent on your side to just bring one home, that might help.
Maybe? LOL
Okay we know that your dad doesn't want you to have a T, and that he's scared of spiders. This begs the question: "Why?"
He's an adult and an intelligent human being, otherwise he wouldn't have a kid that a) wanted a T, and b) knew where to go to get the kind of info and advice that brought you here.
Take the analytical approach, identify his objections, and overcome them (see It Glows's post above) - SELL IT, KID !
First, ask him, in a serious and mature tone, what he is frightened of, and why he doesn't want you to have a tarantula. I'll be willing to bet that his fear is irrational and that it has prevented him from taking the time to learn what remarkable and noble creatures these are (and EASY to care for - see Ariel's post above) -
Next, take him to the gallery section of this forum and let him have a look at an a versicolor, a b smithi, and a c cyaneopubescens - ask him which one he thinks is the prettiest - when he chooses one, say "HEY, DAD, THAT'S THE ONE I WANT!" (Even if it's one you didn't want, go ahead and get it - it may be your first, but trust me, it won't be your last
Then demonstrate to him that you've done your homework and you know how to take care of a T, and that it's all a part of your ongoing education (that one's always a winner!) - show him the enclosure you've set up, and where you'll keep it, emphasis on how secure the enclosure is and how the chances of the T getting out are zero to none
If he still says no, send him to us - we'll have him end up thinking this whole thing was his idea, and the next thing you know you and he will be partners in Tarantula-dom :clap: :clap:
He's an adult and an intelligent human being, otherwise he wouldn't have a kid that a) wanted a T, and b) knew where to go to get the kind of info and advice that brought you here.
Take the analytical approach, identify his objections, and overcome them (see It Glows's post above) - SELL IT, KID !
First, ask him, in a serious and mature tone, what he is frightened of, and why he doesn't want you to have a tarantula. I'll be willing to bet that his fear is irrational and that it has prevented him from taking the time to learn what remarkable and noble creatures these are (and EASY to care for - see Ariel's post above) -
Next, take him to the gallery section of this forum and let him have a look at an a versicolor, a b smithi, and a c cyaneopubescens - ask him which one he thinks is the prettiest - when he chooses one, say "HEY, DAD, THAT'S THE ONE I WANT!" (Even if it's one you didn't want, go ahead and get it - it may be your first, but trust me, it won't be your last
Then demonstrate to him that you've done your homework and you know how to take care of a T, and that it's all a part of your ongoing education (that one's always a winner!) - show him the enclosure you've set up, and where you'll keep it, emphasis on how secure the enclosure is and how the chances of the T getting out are zero to none
If he still says no, send him to us - we'll have him end up thinking this whole thing was his idea, and the next thing you know you and he will be partners in Tarantula-dom :clap: :clap:
Last edited:
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- May 22, 2009
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You also get to learn biology, latin, natural history, ecology, and manufacturing. This hobby also taxes your creative ability as this is a niche-market that few pet-trade manufacturing companies will cater to. It also builds nerves of steel for those who wind up with recalcitrant specimens.I was in the EXACT situation, my mom loves spiders, and my dad is terrifed of them. I'm just going to let you know, it took me 11 years to convince my parents to let me have one (their mistake, I'm getting number 10 soon
1. they're very low maintence
2. they don't make noise.
3. food wise, couldn't be cheaper couple of crickets a week and your good to go.
4. they don't smell!
5. if it stays in your room, your dad should never have to see it! (Unless he's like my dad who comes in and purposefully looks at it, then shudders and makes "how gross" comments which kinda pisses me off)
6. depending on which species you chose, even the perchase of the acctual T won't be very expensive.
7. most tarantula bites are nothing to worry about. (show him the bite reports of the species you intend to get, personally i reccomend a B. smithi or an A. avicularia (or A. versicolor) )
8. do your reseatch (plenty and plenty of research) to make them understand that you know what you're doing, and what your getting into.
Or, if you dads anything like mine, suggest getting a scorpion instead.
Oh, and what are we getting this time????? Can't wait to see it......
I just got over my fear of spiders, and I'm 32 with two intelligent bug-loving children. Fear is a powerful thing, and some people are just happy in that space they create for themselves.
H. lividum, E. pachypus, and H. maculata are great species for this type of operation. ;P
ok guys i found out what im gonna do
set up the tank and tell my mom and dad that i just wanna grow plants in it then sneak a little sling into my fish stuff ( i have reef tanks and piranhas ) and put that little itty bitty little 1/2" gbb or versicolor in there
set up the tank and tell my mom and dad that i just wanna grow plants in it
then sneak a little sling into my fish stuff ( i have reef tanks and piranhas ) and put that little itty bitty little 1/2" gbb or versicolor in there - Joined
- May 22, 2009
- Messages
- 659
Not a good idea......slings need to have proper housing. Otherwise you are asking for more trouble than you will be in when you get caught.
Honestly, coming from a parent, do the right thing. Outsmart your parents directly, rather than being shady about it. Your parents will respect you more for it.
Honestly, coming from a parent, do the right thing. Outsmart your parents directly, rather than being shady about it. Your parents will respect you more for it.
i think you need to be honest with them. it would be unfair to the T to get it behind your parents back and then have them freak out and make you get rid of it or something. it might hurt your chances of getting things you want in the future. also, they might get suspicious when you start buying crickets and stuff all the time.
when i used to live at home and wanted something my parents would usually initially say no. but if i could prove to them that i was mature enough and had done my research sometimes they would come around. i think you should type up a plan. it should include:
-exactly what T (with pics)
-exactly what the enclosure would be (this might help your dad if he sees how serious you are about keeping it in a safe cage-be sure to point out how secure the cage will be)
-how you are paying for it
-how you will take care of it
-all of those benefits that somebody previously posted
by showing your parents you are mature and responsible maybe you can get them to trust your judgment on this.
also, maybe if you suggest the idea of a sling or a juvie it will give them time to get used to the idea of a T before you end up with a huge T
good luck!
when i used to live at home and wanted something my parents would usually initially say no. but if i could prove to them that i was mature enough and had done my research sometimes they would come around. i think you should type up a plan. it should include:
-exactly what T (with pics)
-exactly what the enclosure would be (this might help your dad if he sees how serious you are about keeping it in a safe cage-be sure to point out how secure the cage will be)
-how you are paying for it
-how you will take care of it
-all of those benefits that somebody previously posted
by showing your parents you are mature and responsible maybe you can get them to trust your judgment on this.
also, maybe if you suggest the idea of a sling or a juvie it will give them time to get used to the idea of a T before you end up with a huge T
good luck!
- Joined
- Aug 27, 2006
- Messages
- 249
Low maintenance man... my parents honestly would've never known I had a T. I just told my dad to sign for a box when it comes and he came to check up and I just told him. If you kept it in your room, they would probably never see it. My mom actually didn't know for a week even though I had the container in the open. Just let them know about it so they know what you are in for.
I've done this a few times, since my dad loves snakes, scorpions, tarantulas and what not. My dad and I will say we are going to get pinky mice and crickets for the critters, and than we happen to get a tarantula. And once I get home I quickly house it without my mom noticing. And whenever she goes in my room she will never even notice the extra cage. So after about a month of leaving her in the dark, let her know you got a tarantula a while ago. And by than she wont even be mad at you. oh and DO NOT bug your parents about it... it doesn't help much
But since you dont have a million cages in your room, I would house it and than immediately tell your dad, with of course your mom with you incase it gets out of control. But it all depends on how your parents are. If your dad is the kind who blows up if you dont tell him something important... than I would not do this
But since you dont have a million cages in your room, I would house it and than immediately tell your dad, with of course your mom with you incase it gets out of control.
But it all depends on how your parents are. If your dad is the kind who blows up if you dont tell him something important... than I would not do this