Things that bug you in the hobby

MintyWood826

Arachnobaron
Joined
Jun 16, 2018
Messages
401
People who consider their tarantulas and other inverts objects, even though they are living animals, just because they can't feel anything for you.
 

PanzoN88

Arachnodemon
Joined
Sep 15, 2014
Messages
713
I have been trying to come up with something else to add to this thread for a few weeks now. I finally came up with something that touches on a lot of points.

- people who make raising tarantulas seem harder than it really is.

@CJJon couldn't agree more. Where did that term even come from.
 

baconwrappedpikachu

Arachnosquire
Joined
Dec 18, 2018
Messages
63
People who don't know how to use the search function in (any) tarantula forums, and post asking for generic beginner tips. Or, people who gripe about "know-it-all hobbyists" after someone politely corrects their husbandry.

For example: In one of the FB groups, a woman posted a glass enclosure for an Avicularia she was bringing home and several people specifically advised her that the glass enclosure, because it doesn't allow for cross ventilation, would not be suitable and would kill her Avicularia. They advised that she should get a plastic enclosure or something that has cross ventilation.

Everyone was polite and someone even sent her a link to some acrylic storage containers at walmart. She thanked the group by posting A WHOLE NEW POST griping about how if you don't have actual HELPFUL advice to not say anything at all!

I'm sorry, but do you not have google? Are those horrible "know it alls" the only ones who can manage to type in "avicularia enclosure ideas" into google and do some research on their own?

Sure, I've posted some ridiculous newbie questions, even after hours of research and googling. I've never witnessed anyone being rude to me, or to any other newbie hobbyists, as long as the person is willing to take advice and take responsibility for their own learning. I see a lot of griping about people getting 'attacked' or whatever but the majority of what I see are respectful interactions between more experienced hobbyists and people who are willing to learn.

Too many people expect others to hold their hand throughout the entire learning process. It's just especially annoying to me because we all have so much support within this hobby and everyone is so ready to help eachother learn.
 

Rigor Mortis

Arachnobaron
Joined
Nov 7, 2018
Messages
498
Got another one about non-keepers. Again, I know I shouldn't be angry because they really have no idea and they're just asking a question but I've gotten so tired of answering to, "So, do you like, let them crawl all over our hands and stuff?" Like yeah I just let my spiders rave up and down my arms, it's pretty chill.
And I've also gotten to the stage where I'm immediately annoyed at people's shock and horror when I say I own tarantulas. Get over it you giant baby they're my animals, not yours. I never said you had to come to my house and look at them.
 

SonsofArachne

Arachnoangel
Joined
Dec 10, 2017
Messages
961
Got another one about non-keepers. Again, I know I shouldn't be angry because they really have no idea and they're just asking a question but I've gotten so tired of answering to, "So, do you like, let them crawl all over our hands and stuff?" Like yeah I just let my spiders rave up and down my arms, it's pretty chill.
And I've also gotten to the stage where I'm immediately annoyed at people's shock and horror when I say I own tarantulas. Get over it you giant baby they're my animals, not yours. I never said you had to come to my house and look at them.
A woman in a pet store where I was buying crickets asked me what I buying them for. The look of horror on her face when I told her would only have been appropriate if I mentioned I collected head and crab lice on my body (not that I do - gotta draw the line somewhere, right?;)).
 

The Grym Reaper

Arachnoreaper
Joined
Jul 19, 2016
Messages
4,835
People who insist on taking photos of themselves with a tarantula on their face/cleavage/arms where said body part is nowhere near the ground.

People who have a problem with people using the terms "spood", "spooder", or "spoder". Really? There's plenty of stuff that people come out with that is far more deserving of your scorn, lighten up.

People who have a problem with people naming their tarantulas.

People who ask for advice and then throw a tantrum when the answer isn't what they wanted.

The "kill it with fire" brigade.

(Not that I can blame them because it's usually non-T peeps) Random questions referring to a T by a random-as-heck common name I've never heard before like "Are Asian Szechuan Sauce tarantulas aggressive?"
 

MintyWood826

Arachnobaron
Joined
Jun 16, 2018
Messages
401
People who consider their tarantulas and other inverts objects, even though they are living animals, just because they can't feel anything for you.
May I just add that it's worse when it's an AB member and not just a random person doing that.
 

Rigor Mortis

Arachnobaron
Joined
Nov 7, 2018
Messages
498
A woman in a pet store where I was buying crickets asked me what I buying them for. The look of horror on her face when I told her would only have been appropriate if I mentioned I collected head and crab lice on my body (not that I do - gotta draw the line somewhere, right?;)).
Had a very similar experience a few days ago, lady in line behind me was buying aquarium decorations and I said that's a hobby I could never get into cos I'd go broke buying decorations, but for my Ts I never have to worry. She looked aghast when I said I had not only one spider, but two spiders. :anxious:
 

chevy1375

Arachnopeon
Joined
Jan 10, 2019
Messages
5
People who insist on taking photos of themselves with a tarantula on their face/cleavage/arms where said body part is nowhere near the ground.

People who have a problem with people using the terms "spood", "spooder", or "spoder". Really? There's plenty of stuff that people come out with that is far more deserving of your scorn, lighten up.

People who have a problem with people naming their tarantulas.

People who ask for advice and then throw a tantrum when the answer isn't what they wanted.

The "kill it with fire" brigade.

(Not that I can blame them because it's usually non-T peeps) Random questions referring to a T by a random-as-heck common name I've never heard before like "Are Asian Szechuan Sauce tarantulas aggressive?"
The "Kill it with fire" is definitely annoying.

For me, its when people find out I have 8 tarantulas and all of a sudden I'm an "animal hoarder" or a "crazy spider lady"
 
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Andrea82

Arachnoemperor
Joined
Jan 12, 2016
Messages
3,686
People who require cleavage photos be shot close to the ground.
Nah, by the time the cleavage is close to the ground you can swing-em over your shoulders, no need to photograph them from down under :rofl: :rofl:

One of my internships was in a geriatric nursing home; I once had a patient telling me to just 'roll them up and stack them' into her bra. We both laughed so hard at that, my colleagues came rushing in thinking there was an emergency. :happy:
 

CommanderBacon

Arachnobaron
Joined
May 21, 2018
Messages
498
The thing that bugs me most in the hobby is the huge amount of gatekeeping. Someone always knows better than you, someone always has more experience than you, their way is the right way, and boy howdy are they doing to be a smug douche-canoe about it.

We're all learning as we go, there's no reason to be like that.
 

Chris LXXIX

ArachnoGod
Joined
Dec 25, 2014
Messages
5,845
The "Kill it with fire" is definitely annoying.
The "kill it with fire" brigade.
No! :)

That's a "normal/normality" classic statement, and nothing else.

First lesson of Chris LXXIX 'Disempathy': I don't give a damn, or (Italian) "Me ne frego!" (which means literally 'I don't give a damn' but is absurdly political here, ih ih).

We need to accept that, without giving a damn about :bored:

Besides, all of those 'Kill it with fire' fellas wouldn't even have the manly parts for doing that, in front of a wall-wandering high strung arboreal etc

Pointless to be bothered/annoyed by that.
 

Andrea82

Arachnoemperor
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Jan 12, 2016
Messages
3,686
The thing that bugs me most in the hobby is the huge amount of gatekeeping. Someone always knows better than you, someone always has more experience than you, their way is the right way, and boy howdy are they doing to be a smug douche-canoe about it.

We're all learning as we go, there's no reason to be like that.
You can share your experience without being smug about it.
You can also respond to someone's experience without being offended.

Two sides of the same coin really ;)
 

CommanderBacon

Arachnobaron
Joined
May 21, 2018
Messages
498
You can share your experience without being smug about it.
You can also respond to someone's experience without being offended.

Two sides of the same coin really ;)
I'm not sure I follow what you're trying to say.

A person who replies to an earnest question by a new keeper with a sarcastic non-answer or condescension is gatekeeping. That is an attempt to silence someone who asks a question in good faith by insinuating that they are stupid and their question is foolish, and it is why so many new keepers make their first posts on these boards expecting to be torn apart.

I personally tend to respond to these types of responses with humor, but that's because I've worked in tech for years. I'm used to people doing this and don't take it personally. I doesn't mean it's right, and it's unfair to expect new keepers to just roll with the punches just because so many people in the hobby can't respond to new people asking reasonable questions in a respectful and civil manner.
 

Andrea82

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I'm not sure I follow what you're trying to say.

A person who replies to an earnest question by a new keeper with a sarcastic non-answer or condescension is gatekeeping. That is an attempt to silence someone who asks a question in good faith by insinuating that they are stupid and their question is foolish, and it is why so many new keepers make their first posts on these boards expecting to be torn apart.

I personally tend to respond to these types of responses with humor, but that's because I've worked in tech for years. I'm used to people doing this and don't take it personally. I doesn't mean it's right, and it's unfair to expect new keepers to just roll with the punches just because so many people in the hobby can't respond to new people asking reasonable questions in a respectful and civil manner.
That's indeed what I meant by saying it's possible to share your experience without being smug, yes.

The other side to this however, is that there are a lot of new keepers who are disrespectful to the experienced keepers from the moment they arrive. Which in turn makes the experienced people less willing to kindly answer questions.

Imo, both 'sides' have a responsibility when it comes to learning and sharing, not just the keepers. :)
 

CommanderBacon

Arachnobaron
Joined
May 21, 2018
Messages
498
The other side to this however, is that there are a lot of new keepers who are disrespectful to the experienced keepers from the moment they arrive. Which in turn makes the experienced people less willing to kindly answer questions.

Imo, both 'sides' have a responsibility when it comes to learning and sharing, not just the keepers. :)
I'm talking specifically about gatekeeping. I haven't actually seen any unwarranted instances of newbs being rude and dismissive toward veteran keepers who weren't gatekeeping from the beginning of their interaction with them. I'm sure there are some, but I haven't seen them.

New keepers come here to learn, and to be treated like an imbecile out of the gate is not conducive to learning. People are less likely to be receptive to criticism and pick up new information when they feel as though they're being attacked. Even if they have made a husbandry misstep, responding to them with condescension instead of guidance is not at all constructive. That sort of negative interaction is alienating. It makes new people reluctant to post, which ultimately negates any benefit they can draw from the years of invaluable experience and knowledge people on these boards have.

Therefore, it BUGS me!
 

G. pulchra

ArachnoGod
Old Timer
Joined
Jun 7, 2005
Messages
592
That's indeed what I meant by saying it's possible to share your experience without being smug, yes.

The other side to this however, is that there are a lot of new keepers who are disrespectful to the experienced keepers from the moment they arrive. Which in turn makes the experienced people less willing to kindly answer questions.

Imo, both 'sides' have a responsibility when it comes to learning and sharing, not just the keepers. :)
I'll add to this, it seems that there are quite a few that are very inexperienced with T's who rush to be the first to answer questions and nitpick every enclosure and care detail. If you've only been in the hobby for a year or two, no amount of reading or viewing video's can substitute for actual experience.
 
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