The Gnarly cat

The Snark

Dumpster Fire of the Gods
Old Timer
Aug 8, 2005
During her annular (she's an anal orifice at the vet) check up the vet suggested I document this creature.
Species, Felis originalis. Possible ET in ancestry.
-Born late and last. Came out of mom as if an afterthought: "Oh. And her."
-Came out backwards.
-About 48 hours old. Eyes open.
-Around 5 days old able to get on her feet. Unable to balance and walk, she leaped, crashed and burned then repeat. Managed to escape from the basin her siblings were in 3 weeks before them.
-Used mechanical advantage to get at a teat. Burrow under sibling, push forwards while bobbing head, wedging sibling out of the action.
-Climbed furniture at 2 weeks.

-Comes when called!
-Meows-talks to herself, constantly. Most of the time while purring for no reason. Built in vibrato.
-Uses head, repeatedly, to test if doors are firmly shut.
-Pees in drains, compulsive. Gets drinks from the water around drains.
-Likes having her tail grabbed and petted.
-Insists on head being petted.
-Freaks out when head is petted.
-Short term memory loss. < 1/2 second. (Forgets she is eating, like a fresh fish, wanders off then freaks out when another cat starts eating it. Doesn't try to reclaim it but instead asks for a new fish. Give her a new fish she may have forgotten she is hungry.)
-Eats bras, panties and tissue paper.