Mother in law refuses to come over because of Ts and other herps/inverts

Arachnomaniac1990

Arachnopeon
Active Member
Joined
Jan 19, 2020
Messages
28
Just for anyone wanting to read an update about the situation.
If all the enclosures were moved to the other room she would still refuse.
My solution, move everything to the other room, more space for more Ts in the other rooms.
Plus I've been wanting to get a big Tegu, don't exactly know what species yet, so its plus plus for me.
She can come over when she gets over her fear, if that's the correct word in this situation.
 

hunterc

Arachnopeon
Joined
Jan 14, 2020
Messages
20
In the meantime i would have a huge photoshoot with allllll my T's and decorate the ENTIRE house with as many pictures as i could fit on the walls...BIG pictures!!..close ups, feedings, happy dances, threat postures..THE WORKS!!
 

Arachnomaniac1990

Arachnopeon
Active Member
Joined
Jan 19, 2020
Messages
28
Wrap up a few tarantula molts and give them to her as a birthday gift while you're at it too. :)
Great idea, with a cute bow tie around the package...
Believe me I would, if I wasn't a desent guy.
Not bragging just stating a point.
I just don't get why people are so negative and fearful of spiders, Arthropods in general.
Hell any animal that man doesn't understand or is less knowledgeable about is used as a scapegoat.
In the meantime i would have a huge photoshoot with allllll my T's and decorate the ENTIRE house with as many pictures as i could fit on the walls...BIG pictures!!..close ups, feedings, happy dances, threat postures..THE WORKS!!
I already have a lot of paintings/pictures with Ts, Reptiles and a couple of dogs thrown in for good measure.
Makes the living room much nicer in my opinion.
Your MIL sounds like a horrible person but A+ on getting a tegu. Please name it after her.
Haha that would be a good one.
But I wouldn't want to name a gorgeous Tegu after an ugly old shrew.
And I wouldn't want her to inherit my mil demeanor, she would bit my ass all day.
 

viper69

ArachnoGod
Old Timer
Joined
Dec 8, 2006
Messages
10,352
Don't know if this is the right place to post something like this.
Normally I wouldn't even ask this kind of question but since they have been pressuring me to get rid of them, I wanted to ask your advice/opinions on this matter.
Heres the deal, most of my Ts are in the living room and my Pogona vitticeps and Agama agama also in the living room.
Other inverts are placed in my "hobby room".
Now it has been going on a while know that she refuses to come visit my wife and me.
She's has quite some Arachnophobia but then again she probably has a phobia for everything that's good under the sun.
The past couple of weeks she's been talking with my wife about me getting rid of them, even my lizards.
And of course my wife started argueing with me about this.
Again normally I wouldn't ask this but I don't really know what to do anymore about her attitude towards my animals.
Any suggestions?
I’m going to be blunt

The hell with her- it’s your home NOT hers

Ask her if she’s heard of hotels

People that pressure you to get rid of cherished pets- nice herps! - should be shot on site, questions asked later.

People like her disgust me, she’s a Nazi.

I have zero tolerance for people with zero tolerance
 

Mikeyspikeyz

Arachnopeon
Joined
May 8, 2019
Messages
26
I agree that the issue isn't on your side. While I would never personally keep my exotics in the living room, it is your space and as long as your wife is okay with it then you are doing no wrong.

However, I also live with two people.I got my first sling before I moved in with them, and then all of a sudden there were more. Before I started bringing more home they were both very arachnophobic, however one has warmed up to them (surprisingly the female) my male roommate has "Scolded" me not to get anymore because he still can't stand them. (They are tucked away in my closet in our shared office. He never sees them but they apparently inconvenience him. :rofl: )

You could offer to cover them with a sheet when she comes over, what you don't see can't hurt you right?

Otherwise, moving to the hobby room wouldn't be too bad, plus it would be good motivation to fix the radiator.


TLDR: Exposure/Education is the cure to fear, and eventually everyone is going to check the closet to make sure you didn't get more spiders.
 

Ungoliant

Malleus Aranearum
Staff member
Joined
Mar 7, 2012
Messages
3,701
If all the enclosures were moved to the other room she would still refuse.
That's more than reasonable of you. (It's your house; I don't know that I would've even offered to move my spiders to another room.)

If your mother-in-law doesn't want to be reasonable or accept that she doesn't get to dictate how other people keep their homes, that's on her.
 

Arachnomaniac1990

Arachnopeon
Active Member
Joined
Jan 19, 2020
Messages
28
That's more than reasonable of you. (It's your house; I don't know that I would've even offered to move my spiders to another room.)

If your mother-in-law doesn't want to be reasonable or accept that she doesn't get to dictate how other people keep their homes, that's on her.
Again I agree with you but the least I can do in this situation is try.
True, its not her home and I agree that she would not do the same if it were the other way around, maybe she won't mind with time.
And to be very blunt, I've said it before on this thread and I'll say it again, most of my animals will outlive her, so this is not the last time they are gonna see the living room.
I'm running out of space as it is.
 

Goopyguy56

Arachnodemon
Active Member
Joined
Nov 16, 2017
Messages
733
Don't know if this is the right place to post something like this.
Normally I wouldn't even ask this kind of question but since they have been pressuring me to get rid of them, I wanted to ask your advice/opinions on this matter.
Heres the deal, most of my Ts are in the living room and my Pogona vitticeps and Agama agama also in the living room.
Other inverts are placed in my "hobby room".
Now it has been going on a while know that she refuses to come visit my wife and me.
She's has quite some Arachnophobia but then again she probably has a phobia for everything that's good under the sun.
The past couple of weeks she's been talking with my wife about me getting rid of them, even my lizards.
And of course my wife started argueing with me about this.
Again normally I wouldn't ask this but I don't really know what to do anymore about her attitude towards my animals.
Any suggestions?
If it was that easy to keep my mother in law away I would get more exotic pets. Right now I have a crucifix on my living room wall that seems to work at repelling her. I wouldn't let her have control of your personal life like that. She needs to learn some boundaries.
 

HankyPankyRoe

Arachnosquire
Old Timer
Joined
Nov 8, 2008
Messages
103
I'm sorry, but there is no way in hell I would hide, move my animals to another room, or get rid of them because someone doesn't like them. It's your house, not hers!
 
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