I have a fun game. It's called- "Don't Listen to Apriljanzen"

GPulchra

Arachnoknight
Joined
Jul 21, 2010
Messages
279
I stumbled upon this when looking for some acrylic sling cages. How many flaws can you find in this paragraph?
apriljanzen said:
Initial cost: Bringing home a new tarantula will cost about $95. You can expect to pay $20 for a 10 gallon aquarium, $20 on a light fixture, $10 on a bulb, $10 on an automatic timer, and $15 on cage accessories like substrate and hidey holes, and a minimum of $20 for the tarantula itself.
Maintenance: Each year you will spend about $50 on food, $20 on lamp bulbs, and $20 on cage accessories like substrate, for an average of $90 per year, or $2 per week
From Amazon Askville. Question: How much do tarantulas cost?
 

Moltar

ArachnoGod
Old Timer
Joined
Apr 11, 2007
Messages
5,449
Lol, that answer was 46 months old. With inflation that's going to be more like $110 now.
 

KoriTamashii

Arachnobaron
Old Timer
Joined
Nov 21, 2009
Messages
419
Not sure if we're supposed to post threads like this, though I do agree, what the deuce?
 

GPulchra

Arachnoknight
Joined
Jul 21, 2010
Messages
279
Lol, that answer was 46 months old. With inflation that's going to be more like $110 now.
Are you kidding? I paid 55 bucks for my sling total, and it's a Pulchra.

And did anyone notice that apriljanzen mentioned a bulb and light fixture?
 

Vespula

Arachnodemon
Joined
Jul 27, 2010
Messages
707
Lighting fixtures? Automatic timers? What the mess, man? that's nto even neccesary! *epic facepalm*
 

GPulchra

Arachnoknight
Joined
Jul 21, 2010
Messages
279
Yeah, everyone knows that Ts need to be fed caviar to emulate their original environment. It's part of their daily diet :p .
 

Scorpionking20

Arachnoknight
Old Timer
Joined
May 31, 2010
Messages
158
My gentle OBT enjoys only 2 servings of caviar a day. As snacks. His staple diet includes leafy greens with a savory sauce, usually a vinagarette, served 6 times a day. He only drinks Fiji bottled water, enjoys warm water showers, and also entertains romantic walks on the beach where he can dine on freshly laid salmon caviar that the fish are nice enough to deposit for him.

At home, he enjoys basking 2" under a 200 watt heat lamp, 14 hours a day. At night he'll retreat to his burrow which is right on top of the undertank heater. He likes it warm! Lastly, his substrate is replaced twice a day to keep things fresh and clean. I mix the substrate with febreze as he enjoys various aromas floating around to lighten the mood of his rather tight 200 gallon home. I'll be getting him a 1,000 gallon home on his next molt to make sure he can stretch.

Or...the OP's quote hopefully won't get some unaware person to waste all of that equipment to torment a T. I'm hoping you all caught my sarcasm... :)
 

Redneck

Arachnoprince
Old Timer
Joined
Aug 1, 2009
Messages
1,393
My gentle OBT enjoys only 2 servings of caviar a day. As snacks. His staple diet includes leafy greens with a savory sauce, usually a vinagarette, served 6 times a day. He only drinks Fiji bottled water, enjoys warm water showers, and also entertains romantic walks on the beach where he can dine on freshly laid salmon caviar that the fish are nice enough to deposit for him.

At home, he enjoys basking 2" under a 200 watt heat lamp, 14 hours a day. At night he'll retreat to his burrow which is right on top of the undertank heater. He likes it warm! Lastly, his substrate is replaced twice a day to keep things fresh and clean. I mix the substrate with febreze as he enjoys various aromas floating around to lighten the mood of his rather tight 200 gallon home. I'll be getting him a 1,000 gallon home on his next molt to make sure he can stretch.

Or...the OP's quote hopefully won't get some unaware person to waste all of that equipment to torment a T. I'm hoping you all caught my sarcasm... :)
You were being sarcastic? Subtle... Very subtle... {D
 

malevolentrobot

Arachnobaron
Old Timer
Joined
Jan 21, 2010
Messages
310
i think i've found the root of my OBTs attitude problem, i've been denying her that luxurious lifestyle she feels she deserves since leaving the petstore... :rolleyes:
 

GPulchra

Arachnoknight
Joined
Jul 21, 2010
Messages
279
My gentle OBT enjoys only 2 servings of caviar a day. As snacks. His staple diet includes leafy greens with a savory sauce, usually a vinagarette, served 6 times a day. He only drinks Fiji bottled water, enjoys warm water showers, and also entertains romantic walks on the beach where he can dine on freshly laid salmon caviar that the fish are nice enough to deposit for him.

At home, he enjoys basking 2" under a 200 watt heat lamp, 14 hours a day. At night he'll retreat to his burrow which is right on top of the undertank heater. He likes it warm! Lastly, his substrate is replaced twice a day to keep things fresh and clean. I mix the substrate with febreze as he enjoys various aromas floating around to lighten the mood of his rather tight 200 gallon home. I'll be getting him a 1,000 gallon home on his next molt to make sure he can stretch.

Or...the OP's quote hopefully won't get some unaware person to waste all of that equipment to torment a T. I'm hoping you all caught my sarcasm... :)
You were being sarcastic!? Darnit, I actually provide all those slings to my .75" sling :p .
 

Scorpionking20

Arachnoknight
Old Timer
Joined
May 31, 2010
Messages
158
You were being sarcastic? Subtle... Very subtle... {D
LOL...God forbid somebody read my post and actually try anything mentioned! Had to put in the disclaimer, ya know? People will do crazy things sometimes. I'd be both terribly sad, and happily entertained (in a sadistic way, yes) by somebody putting a 200 watt heat bulb right above their T. I wonder if it would smoke?

Anyways...gotta put those disclaimers out just in case! :razz:
 
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