Convincing parents

Zelda1722

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I've been wanting to get a tarantula for about four years and I've finally got the job to care for them. But my mom and sister are scared of spiders would there be any way to convince them to let me keep one?
 

EulersK

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Get a beginner species - easy to care for, low venom potency, and typically slow. These big spiders don't even move like "true" spiders (like what you'd find around your house). They're much more lumbering, slow, more predictable. I think it's how true spiders move that freaks people out, not so much the fact that they are spiders. If they're scared of these "giant" spiders, then look into a dwarf species. The Euathlus genus would be a good place to start.

At the end of the day, you need to respect their wishes. If you were terrified of snakes, it wouldn't be very nice for your sister to buy a snake. If their fear is at the phobia level, then I'd drop the subject all together. If they just get the "willies" over spiders like 99% of the population, then try talking to them.
 

SausageinaNet

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When I got my first T I didn't ask my parents before. That's not what I would recommend you do if you have a regular relationship with your parents. It's hard to convince people who are scared of spiders that they are harmless and I for my part don't even bother explaining it to people anymore. You can try to tell them all the regular stuff like they are harmless, they are usefull because they eat other insects etc. but tbh usually that doesn't work too good. If you live with your father and he isn't scared of spiders I would first try to convince him.
 

BorisTheSpider

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If you were terrified of snakes, it wouldn't be very nice for your sister to buy a snake. If their fear is at the phobia level, then I'd drop the subject all together. If they just get the "willies" over spiders like 99% of the population, then try talking to them.
In most cases the answer is no . When someone has a legitimate fear then that's pretty much all there is too it . It's doubtful that you'll convince them otherwise . I'm not saying don't give it a try , but you'll probably be waiting until you have your own place .
 

Sarkhan42

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When I got my first T I didn't ask my parents before. That's not what I would recommend you do if you have a regular relationship with your parents. It's hard to convince people who are scared of spiders that they are harmless and I for my part don't even bother explaining it to people anymore. You can try to tell them all the regular stuff like they are harmless, they are usefull because they eat other insects etc. but tbh usually that doesn't work too good. If you live with your father and he isn't scared of spiders I would first try to convince him.
That's generally what I did. I got my father interested in them, and my mother warmed up to them along the way. They also sell cages that you can put a lock on, if that makes your mother and sister feel better about things.
 

Chris LXXIX

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Once a brat in Italy killed all of his family because he was pissed off by the fact that he wasn't entitled to partake in the, for orphans only, trip day organized by the Church.

I'm not saying that this is your case, uh. Just a memento :angelic:

Me? Being you, in the same situation? Well, I did that in 1992, and I wasn't 19, I/We (Bro) were 13 and 12 ;)
 

cold blood

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Once a brat in Italy killed all of his family because he was pissed off by the fact that he wasn't entitled to partake in the, for orphans only, trip day organized by the Church.

I'm not saying that this is your case, uh. Just a memento :angelic:

Me? Being you, in the same situation? Well, I did that in 1992, and I wasn't 19, I/We (Bro) were 13 and 12 ;)
Well at least they finally let you out.
 

Chris LXXIX

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So, what are you waiting for, Zelda? For Link, to save you, and the whole Hyrule? ;-)

Buy the Teraphosidae you want, buy that with your money. Be sure that you have the know how and the necessary for the care. Always with a serious attitude. This ends your part.

No matter, love is more greater than a spider web, or venom, or what else. I'm sure, with no doubts, that your family knows that. Your sister and mother will understand your passion.

To "Dare" mentality, always!
 

SausageinaNet

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That's generally what I did. I got my father interested in them, and my mother warmed up to them along the way. They also sell cages that you can put a lock on, if that makes your mother and sister feel better about things.
When I got my first T I still lived with both of my parents. Neither of them said something about me getting a spider without asking permission (I was only 17). They both took a look, asked some questions and then decided both that it is to boring for them. I would just go with the father because males usually aren't that scared of spiders (exceptions excluded before somebody complains) and might be easyer to convince and maybe even show some interest. In my eyes thats your best bet going with your dad but it might also fail.
Me? Being you, in the same situation? Well, I did that in 1992, and I wasn't 19, I/We (Bro) were 13 and 12 ;)
In 1992 I wasn't even alive, old man ;).
 

Octagon

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My 2 cents: like Sarkhan42 said, tell them that you would get a cage style with a lock on it. Explain to them that you wouldn't be handling the T or taking it out (except once in a blue moon, if ever, to change the substrate), and that having a T is like having fish in the sense that it's an "observe-only" pet. Also, they might appreciate that there will be no noise and no smell. B. albopilosum would be an excellent species to propose because you can explain it's "New World", and known as a "beginner tarantula" with milder venom. Plus they might be intrigued despite themselves by the fact that it's a unique type that has curly hair!
 

Crone Returns

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Once a brat in Italy killed all of his family because he was pissed off by the fact that he wasn't entitled to partake in the, for orphans only, trip day organized by the Church.

I'm not saying that this is your case, uh. Just a memento :angelic:

Me? Being you, in the same situation? Well, I did that in 1992, and I wasn't 19, I/We (Bro) were 13 and 12 ;)
Yeah, but you and Bro were still in the cute phase. At 19, not so much.
 

Zed21

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I would just go with the father
100% agree with this. My mom would never be fine with the idea of a spider in the house but my dad is pretty much perfectly fine so long as there's no chance anything will get out.

You also could try showing them various videos of the spider you're wanting to get if you have one in mind. Alternatively just assure them that you know what you're doing, demonstrate some knowledge about the spider you want to buy and more so you know how to care for them safely and ideally they'll come around to it. Definitely still recommend appealing to your dad unless he's an arachnophobe.
 

Chris LXXIX

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Yeah, but you and Bro were still in the cute phase. At 19, not so much.
Well, but a 19 year Lady is (technically, eh) supposed to be more responsible than a couple of Slayer T-shirts brats returning home with a couple of giant hairy spiders :)
 

Chris LXXIX

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However I'm not that old :) for that I have still a good 3 years before reaching 40, and if life starts at 40, like someone said, then yuppiiiii :kiss:
 

Vanessa

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I can remember moving out into my first apartment. The first thing I did was go out and buy myself a rat. A great big honey coloured boy named Simon. He was awesome. The spiders came a few years later.
I can still remember that feeling of freedom when nobody could tell me what to do anymore.
That was a long, long, time ago.
 

Toxoderidae

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I figured I should reply since I just went through this not a year ago.

I would explain to them what you're planning on keeping, have you and your parents sit down and talk about it. Point out the pros, and try to make the cons sound as little as possible (just like they really are, no cons :) ) What I did was give them information and reports on their venom and what they can do, and don't try to put any icing on it or anything, be serious and blunt about it, it's best to go straightforward with honesty. (even if NW species won't do much venom wise) And try to find ways to use the idea of spiders to appeal to them. And if that doesn't work, just whittle them down over a long period of time. It's how I managed to get a scorpion.
 
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