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Discussion in 'Tarantula Chat' started by Drea, Apr 5, 2019.
Yes, those people are ignorant. That's fine, everyone is ignorant of A LOT. Who cares about them.... Ignorance is fine, willful stupidity is not.
Hoarding? Absolutely not. The definition of a hoarder is someone who cannot part with anything because it causes them anxiety to think of parting with anything. Then stuff accumulates they get overwhelmed, and the cycle continues. Animals in hoarding situations are not properly care for and their populations get out of control because they are reproducing (usually the ownee is overwhelmed and not acquiring more from outside sources at that point). Hoarding and addiction are both mental disorders, and neither applies seriously to the hobby of T keeping in normal parameters.
Actually, to get serious for a second, A hoarder is a person who has a mental disorder that keeps them from throwing away things that are essentially worthless because they might "need them". A animal hoarder is someone who keeps a large number of animals but is UNABLE TO CARE FOR THEM PROPERLY, leading to abuse and neglect.
Welcome to my pet peeve - I have a large number of inverts and am neither of these things, all my animals are well taken care of. I really hate it when people throw around the term hoarder here. I have a cousin who is a actual hoarder, and have had a family member seriously accuse me of animal hoarding (because they know nothing about inverts and the relatively small amount of time it takes to care for them) so forgive me for maybe being overly sensitive. I get that it's being used mostly as a joke, but I have also seen where some on here have meant it seriously when talking about people with a lot of T's.
Wrote this before I read Teal's post above - I wouldn't have posted this is if I had.
Well I, for one, am glad you posted it!
I have also been accused of being a hoarder by people who don't understand... it is scary and hurtful.
I only have 4, but I was forbidden by my husband to get another after 3. So numero quatro currently lives in my closet, camouflaged among the shoes, bags and accessories like E.T.
So it begins...
After my poor P. irminia died, I only have 4 tarantulas left. I would like to get more... but what I can get is a bit limited: more NWs with urticating hairs are not an option, and I have other pets so I'm not really comfortable getting OWs either. And I don't feel like getting more arboreals... so... I don't know. Not that many options (that I like) left, which is great limiter for my tiny collection.
I have been accused of the same thing so I know what you mean. I have been a volunteer for hoard clean up and it is so painful to watch someone cry uncontrollably because you were shoveling out 1000s of empty or rotton food tin cans. I am glad you posted because many of us can relate.
I worked at a shoe store and a regulars husband had forbidden her to buy more shoes.
She would still buy any where from 3 to 10 at a time. I asked how her husband didn’t know. She would to her husband, ”what I have had these and I wore them on our last date.”
Then he would drop it because he felt bad for not remember what she was wearing. It totally worked.
Suggestions of statements:
“This is the same one, they change color when they grow”
“You have seen this one before, he just look a lot lot lot smaller because he is molting”
“It’s not mine, I am only taking care it until my friend gets back from her peace core mission in hati. 3 or 4 years no big deal”
“ this one was sitting on the table with a bow on it, I thought it was from you”
“My other T was lonely and depressed so I had to get him a friend.”
Just a thought.. hahaha although hiding Number 4 is awesome! If you could one you could hide more. You have skills. Haha
Because I am in a mood...
It worries me how many people think this is funny.
1. Spouses who "forbid" things are controlling and that is not healthy.
2. Doing "forbidden" things in secret from the spouse is a violation of trust and is not healthy.
I'm just glad I don't have these issues with my partners. Whew.
I worked for county animal control when I was a teen and assisted in removing dogs from a hoarding situation once... it broke my heart. The woman was in her 70s, sobbing over each and every tiny filthy dog, kissing them and apologizing for what was happening *sigh*
That is so sad. I have never helped with a situation like that. It’s hard to see a person in true pain like that especially when they should be enjoying those golden years. At the same time I don’t feel bad for her because the animals suffered so much and she was the cause. Either way is just terrible to witness. I can’t imagine what that felt like for you.
Oh, we totally have the marriage counselor and lawyers on speed dial.
I kid, I kid. In principle, I very much agree with you. If my words were to be taken at face value, they would cause alarm. In an effort to be funny - and brief - I left out the 25 year history of my relationship which would provide the context needed to assure you of a boringly functional and supportive marriage.
Should Quatro be discovered by hubby it would elicit a response more along the lines of "I knew it!!" with an ear-to-ear grin and knowing side-eye in my direction. Not so much a reaction of "You've violated my trust for the last time by disobeying my direct orders, and the marriage is over."
So continue to laugh at my closeted T story with a clear conscience knowing no emotional abuse of spouses are a part of it!
I started around a month ago I have 5 and 6 on the way
She was the cause, but as a side effect of not having the help she needed She was not willfully neglectful... she just got overwhelmed.
Thanks for dealing with my mood I figured that was probably the type of situation haha
That’s why I kept funny as this thread is all about getting laughs. On the bright side, at least people were willing to come to aid if in fact you actually needed as some woman do.
I recommend the first choice. “You have already seen this one, they just change color.” Haha
Pure gold. I’m filing that one away for future reference.
Caught getting out of the car with a new kritter keeper - "New Tarantula? Nope, just rehousing. They grow so fast!"
So, I have problems with addiction. Big time. Whilst it started with drinking and drugs, it's still just overall a part of myself. So, when I had naught all to do, I started getting into spiders. Then I got excited about them. Then for a period there, anything rather negative was attempted to be counter-acted with a spider purchase, I was severely bored, etc. I started to recognize that the old feelings of addiction had landed onto something else. Thankfully I calmed down and was able to ground myself before things got anywhere close to out of control but it was a bit on edge there for a little while. So, I would say I am most definitely still addicted to tarantulas but am being much more responsible about it nowadays.