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Ok, I have to vent this...

Discussion in 'Tarantula Chat' started by WhyUBiteBite, Apr 19, 2017.

  1. TarantulaArvind

    TarantulaArvind Arachnopeon

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    First of all, Jus because we don't understand some phenomena, doesn't mean it doesn't exists.. And believing in such a thing that we don't necessarily perceive with our 5 senses doesn't make us fools.

    In fact, to say that something doesn't exist jus because we don't understand or feel them only makes us narrow minded..
    But theist or atheist, to each their own...

    Secondly, in ur atheistic prejudice and/or outsider understanding makes u think that religion works by instilling fear... No.. It doesn't... If a person is really spiritualistic(mind u, I didn't use the word "religion"), they'll try to make u understand the meaning of life.. The purpose of the soul on this earth, and not concentrate on materialistic aspects like forcing ones personal religion by means of force /fear, terrorism etc...

    As one other user said, we" spiritualistic people are also men of science(myself pursuing PhD in biological sciences)..

    On an ending note... Plz don't bring up religious aspects into this community... Atheist /agnostic or otherwise, this is a community that brings us together based on our love for life (especially arachnids) inspite of us all being continents apart..

    Peace...
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2017
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  2. KaptinKrunch

    KaptinKrunch Arachnopeon

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    Wow. The cheek of her mother!

    This is your home. You do what you like in your home. If she doesn't like it she doesn't have to visit. That's the way I would look at it. She was told multiple times, so she could have declined visiting.

    What shocked me was a spider was potentially injured because of her stupidity. She has no right to touch your belongings.

    If it were me in this situation I would tell my mother in law she is no longer welcome at my home until she can accept that my home is my home and I will do what I damn well please inside it.

    It's a bad situation because you have to please the wife and denying her access to the home is tricky without upsetting the one you love the most.

    I would have a chat with the wife, and then speak with the mother all together. Be nice and calm and just explain. Something like ...

    "I'm sorry you feel threatened and offended by my spider collection. But, you must respect this is my home and I have to care for them. You very nearly killed one of my spiders, and I know that doesn't seem like a big deal to you but these are my pets. I enjoy them as much as others enjoy having a cat, or a dog. That may be hard for you to accept but you have to respect this is my home and I can do what I please inside it. I don't want to cause any issues between us, but I want to make it known that this can not happen again. Do you accept that?"

    And then I'd act depending on the answer. She would be irrational if she didn't accept that.

    Sorry you're going through this. I've had issues with my wifes mother. I loaned her £7,000 6 years ago and still haven't seen a penny of it. And likely never will. But, I still have to get along with her to keep the wife happy.

    In laws. Urgh!

    Edit: Having read other replies I do agree it probably wasn't best to do maintenance whilst she was there. It just saves all these hassles. When my brother stays over I don't mess with my T's because he's already scared to death of being in the same house as spiders. The kids love looking at them, but the adults don't like them much.

    I don't know the context of the situation, but either way potentially killing one of your T's isn't good at all. She could have just asked you to put them away until she leaves.
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2017
  3. Jeff23

    Jeff23 Arachnolord Arachnosupporter

    I agree with the idea that it would perhaps be best to plan to not do T activities if you know she is about to visit (unless you have a T emergency situation). At the same time I would also try to create a path to discuss T's with her at some point after you give her some type of chance to like you. I would view it as a challenge to try to change her opinion on spiders. Look at it first from the angle of all the good things spiders do for us in the world before approaching the discussion of the ones you own.

    I think too many people are ignorant of spiders and follow the mass approach of just disliking spiders because everyone else also dislikes them rather than studying them and making their own opinion. I also think many people do automatically label people who own spiders as being rebels, bad guys, evil, etc. that are against the system. And it isn't any different from the religious stereotyping that goes in both directions by some far right religious individuals and atheists. Everyone should have the opportunity to be treated as an individual and be judged based on their actions.
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2017
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  4. Belegnole

    Belegnole Tarantula Guy Old Timer

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    I'm going to assume that you knew your mother in law was coming over. Considering you already knew her views on your pets, your timing for doing maintenance was pretty bad. Of course while you should be free to keep your normal schedule, her previous behavior should have guided you.

    That being said I'm not one to be bullied in my own home. I would have most likely been tempted to kick her out on the spot.

    It sounds like you two have ongoing issues that need to be dealt with one way or the other.

    Good Luck
     
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  5. ledzeppelin

    ledzeppelin Arachnobaron

    I have a similar nutcase in my family.. My father's aunt once wandered in my flat uninvited and began ranting on how this is not cool with God and that it's torture of the animals, since they belong to the desert, that they are unpure animals, that im putting my whole house in danger.. That was years ago when I had like 5 of them.. Look at me now B..
     
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  6. Kendricks

    Kendricks Arachnosquire

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    Not how it works, and I also didn't claim no god(s) exist - I said there's no evidence at all. Which is 100% true.

    In what "thing" exactly?
    I was speaking religion, not any diety.
    And yes, following some 2000+ Years old fantasy stories bursting of contradictions and silly claims, only to oppress the masses and make them obedient, is pretty foolish in my book, sorry.

    True. Good thing I didn't say that. Your point being?

    Ah yes, "atheists are prejudice", sure.
    Sorry, won't bite.

    And yes. Religion does work by instilling fear, it always did. Did you actually read your holy book, the old testament especially? Or others, like the Quran?
    It is FULL of nonsensical fear mongering.
    > "Do as I say or fry in Hell/won't go to paradise - and for heaven's sake: don't you masturbate!!!"
    Ridiculous.

    The topic was religion. Why bring spirituality in when you yourself mention it's different?! Also, no one said people with scientific degrees can't be spiritual, religious, or whatever - why bring it up?

    > Tells others not to talk about religion.
    > Talks about religion.

    :rolleyes:

    Btw, I didn't bring religion into this. Someone else did, I chimed in with a snarky remark. Crucify me. *shrug*

    Maybe some day when mankind evolved enough to leave religion behind. Maybe.
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2017
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  7. ledzeppelin

    ledzeppelin Arachnobaron

    Stop arguing about religion. Go on a date and do the charade there. Unless there's an 8 legged god your posts don't fit in.
     
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  8. Kendricks

    Kendricks Arachnosquire

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  9. KaptinKrunch

    KaptinKrunch Arachnopeon

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    The God debate exists everywhere. On every forum on the Internet you will find many God debates. I think arguing about religion on a spider forum isn't beneficial. It ends up in arguments. As can be seen here. But, if it is to be discussed it should be done in a civil, and constructive way. Throwing digs at each other because opinions differ is immature. Just another reason why children should be taught philosophy at school (why isn't that done by the way? There is so much value to learn from learning how to debate!).

    Whether or not a creator of the Universe exists is yet to be seen. I'm not religious, but it would be wrong to proclaim with 100% certainty that a creator of the Universe is an impossibility. Why? Because there is so much we don't know. There is so much wonder and amazement in the Universe that some sort of creator could be a possibility. Heck, some scientists are even entertaining simulation theory!

    Astrologers claim the universe is infinite and ever expanding. A lot of people tend to believe this. The Hubble telescope can only observe part of the universe, what exists beyond the Hubble volume (the area of the universe the Hubble telescope can see) is unknown. Just like religion there is some element of faith in believing something that can't be observed.

    Do humans even know the laws of the Universe? Math and science can explain physics (although at the quantum level the laws differ). But are these mathematical and scientific laws actually the laws of the universe, or are they just a tool used to explain the observable?

    There is so much humans do not know.

    The fact these arguments exist between God and science isn't because humans are "stupid". We're all looking for the same answer. We all want to know the meaning of life, and the reason for existence, and what happens after death. Some rely on the work of science, others rely on religion for those answers.

    Who's wrong? Nobody! Life is an individual journey and you do what you can to get by.

    Science doesn't hold all the answers unfortunately. And in years to come some of the theories we live by now may be proven wrong. That's not to say religion is correct, but I am saying keep an open mind and respect other peoples opinions. Similar to how we expect others to respect our decision to keeps T's right?

    It bugs me that a lot of people fall back on science, yet they've never read a journal, or a paper, or researched a topic thoroughly before adding their input. People are quick to fall back on science without understanding what they're talking about.

    Chill. Enjoy life. It's an exciting journey that should be enjoyed :)
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2017
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  10. Hellblazer

    Hellblazer Arachnosquire

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    I agree, it shouldn't be brought up here, but it's kind of ironic that you said so after several paragraphs stating your opinion of it.
     
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  11. Arachnophoric

    Arachnophoric Arachnopeon Active Member

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    PBUH! :troll:
     
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  12. Arachnophoric

    Arachnophoric Arachnopeon Active Member

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    "I'm going to talk about a controversial thing/opinion but now that I've talked about it no one else can say anything to contradict me!"

    I jest :troll:

    Discussions don't work like that. But if this conversation wants to continue, I do think there's a more appropriate area to post said conversation. Don't we have a subforum specifically for threads unrelated to inverts? Or are religious views a taboo topic even there?
     
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  13. Chris LXXIX

    Chris LXXIX Arachnoking

    HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESY! :angelic:

    There's the Goddess 0.1 Pelinobius muticus PBUH (Peace Be Upon Her) that, in ancient Era, was called Anansi!

    The Goddess 0.1 has to be Anansi of the African legend :kiss:

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anansi
     
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  14. gypsy cola

    gypsy cola Arachnoknight

    oh a religious debate.... okay I am in,


    I think the Amish are the strongest religion. I mean they do everything by hand and burn 10,000 calories a day. I don't think anyone in any other religion could beat the Amish in a 1 on 1 boxing match.
     
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  15. Jeff23

    Jeff23 Arachnolord Arachnosupporter

    It would be interesting to have a thread providing different myths, beliefs, etc. related to spiders from a historical perspective only. I just Googled and found a few.

    EDIT* But that is more generic to spiders than just tarantulas.
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2017
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  16. Casey K

    Casey K Arachnoknight Arachnosupporter

    Again, another ignorant person that just needs to be educated. People fear what they don't know. She had no right doing that....Regardless her fear, dislikes, etc. about the animal. You took that a lot better than I would've. "Exit stage left" would've been her route.
     
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  17. Andrea82

    Andrea82 Arachnoprince Active Member

    What I don't understand is why she was with you and your T's in the first place. She had no business being there at all.
    If I am with my T's NOBODY comes near me until I give green. Not my husband, not my daughter, not the king of the Netherlands.
    So instead of going into debate on why it is wrong to swat a T (which is very wrong, I am not saying that's okay), instill in the woman that when you are with your spiders, she is never, ever to approach you.
    I would go flaming mad if my MIL would even come up in my T room, or tried to talk to me through the door. We have a daughter. If I get distracted because someone wants to discuss something with me, things can go VERY wrong, VERY fast.
    It is not a hard thing to remember 'he's with his T's, leave him alone'.
    Seriously...smh. :shifty:
    ( made you happy, @Chris LXXIX , that I added that darling? :D)
     
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  18. KaptinKrunch

    KaptinKrunch Arachnopeon

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    ^ Well said!
     
  19. TarantulaArvind

    TarantulaArvind Arachnopeon

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    I replied to the said person coz what he said had to be countered.. But I know that continuing this particular topic in this unrelated thread isn't healthy as well... So I made my point n will not reply further regarding that.. There's nothing ironical about it.. Besides I wasn't the one to actually broach that particular topic..
     
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  20. Chris LXXIX

    Chris LXXIX Arachnoking

    Just that, sometimes, during the Rumspringa, someone forget to return at Father's House for live a forever funny life 'outside' :kiss:

    :troll: