For those who have children...

[MountinGal]

As both a parent and a teacher I'm curious about this.

I grew up being afraid of spiders and would like to show my daughter they're nothing to be afraid of. Will having them as pets in the house increase her tolerance, or are some kids just predispositioned not to like creepie-crawlie things?

My daughter isn't even two, but she likes the pictures in the Tarantula Keeper's Guide and Sam Marshall's book. Obviously she's too little to feel one way or the other about them yet-or get anywhere near them- but I was wondering what sorts of experiences some of you other parents have had with your kids and spiders meshing - or not. :}

 

[Elizabeth]

My girls, 4 and 6 yrs, are extremely spider-tolerant, as well as tolerant of all the other creatures we keep. They appreciate what the creatures have to offer. They always want to help feed. They want to hold them. Mostly, beyond teaching them all the wonderful things, I have to teach a lot of respect for the creatures to keep them from hurting them from too much love or curiosity. They haven't had a bad experience yet, but I talk about the fangs and that a bite could hurt. We talk a bit about the reasons a spider might bite and teach perspective (how big we are and how this might scare a spider). Leave creatures alone if they don't want to be handled. (Look for those clues.)

It has been very positive so far.

I also bring creatures (spiders, snakes, millipedes, whatever I can catch) into a kindergarten class and the response is completely positive. They learn about these creatures early? They seem to then have no unreasonable fears, but respect and interest. (I don't want the first bad experience, if or when it happens, to be a shock or turn-off, so I am quite careful to teach what that experience could/will mean.)

I think you should go for it.

PS As for innate love/fear, one daughter LOVES all the creatures, while the other just sort of likes them. Neither one exhibited any fears before we got the "zoo" going. I have always loved bugs and all, so they never had a fear model, as well as that neither had any apparent innate fear.

 

[PapaRoacher]

My chick was the most arachnophobic person I'd ever met, but, shortly after I started collecting Ts, she calmed down, and acknowledged the fact that there is nothing fear from them... Now, she's always bugging to hold them, and buy more

 

[conipto]

I think it's entirely on how you bring them up. My daughter is 6, and loves them.. but probably only because her father does.

Bill

 

[Tony]

I think it's entirely on how you bring them up. My daughter is 6, and loves them.. but probably only because her father does.

Bill

I agree, but Alex is only 12 months, so my influence has yet to show...Of greater concern is keeping 'dangerous' animals...I give serious thought to making sure ALL spiders are locked in, can't have any accidents..
T

 

[Windchaser]

My three kids, ages 13, 11 and 9, were a liitle scared at first. I first started collecting about 4.5 years ago. However, since our first T, they have really become interested in them and care about them quite a bit. They even ask for T's for presents now. As others have said, what we teach and show them will matter. That is one reason I give presentations at my kids' schools. The response is usually very positive.

 

[Gemein]

Hey....
The best I could really think of is educate the tiny one about it step by step; and naturally visual acceptance will be something that will naturally grow on her. I think it's great that you'd like to introduce her to a T and teach her about them. Just naturally make sure it's something docile and one that stays out. Might be tough for her if the damn thing is always in burrow hehe... don't want her getting interested and reaching in the tank to tease it out ;
Good Luck

 

[Crotalus]

I think it's entirely on how you bring them up. My daughter is 6, and loves them.. but probably only because her father does.

Bill

My daughter, who is now 15, havent any interest for my animals at all. And never had. I guess i failed miserably then..

/Lelle

 

[Mandi]

its all in how you approach them.

I was terrified of spiders when i was a kid, then i started spending more time in the woods with my grandpa who taught me to appreciate them.

My boyfriend on the other hand.. HATES my spiders, and my lizards, and well hes 22 so thats going to be a tough one to crack lol.

I always have little ones around the house and I tend to give them the same sort of lessons my grandpa gave me about nature, and how even the "Scariest" looking things arent much different than we are.

It helps if you relate the things the animals do to the things that we do in our every day life, while youre teaching the kids about how they live ect ect.

one thing i will never EVER get used to though is roaches *shudders*

 

[thedreadedone]

I have learnt, from working with kids and bugs that
kids are very tolerant of bugs and creepy crawlies, until they hit about 5 years old. thats about when parental influences kick in, and they get scared of them.

 

[luther]

Both my kids (6 and 8) are into tarantulas, inverts and snakes. We have many invertebrate pets and the children consider this normal. We keep ghost and flower mantids on the house plants in summer and somewhere in our house is an escaped baby corn snake. Don't tell our neighbours ;}

Children seem to pick up a lot of populist nonsense when they start dealing with the social complexities of the playground. I'm particularly proud of my daughter's strength of will in maintaining her interest in things that many of her friends consider disgusting.

We do occasional minibeast demonstrations for the younger children at the school. We've found that if you catch the children at the very start of school age you can head off the fear reaction and replace it with fascination (or at least tolerance).

If you want to start smaller then catch a house spider. We kept one for a year in a tall mason jar, feeding it small insects. It made fantastic webs and was a voracious feeder. Try keeping caterpillars and local millipedes. They often make good starter pets.

I wouldn't worry about the "dangerous animals" thing. A New World terrestrial tarantula in a tank with a well secured lid isn't a threat to anything much, other than a cricket. We have six tarantulas in the lounge. To put it into perspective, every member of my familly has been injured by our cats. I even had to go to casualty for stiches after a particularly bad facial cut. No one seems to think that domestic cats are dangerous animals, yet they carry a much higher threat of injury than pet tarantulas.

 

[Sheri]

I think it would certainly help with the fear aspect. Whether she adopts the hobby and takes an interest in it will depend entirely on her individual personality.

I'd get a snake too, and a scorp for good measure.

 

[Sandra]

I'm 38 and all my adult life have been into creepy crawlers. (Most adults think I'm a tad weird, when they realize this.) I won't hesitate to hold a snake, catch a praying mantis, etc. etc. I blame/credit my older brother for that. While I was very small, he was really into such critters and took the time to show and teach me about them. I think it it engrained positive experiences in me, before fears had a chance to develop.

I was always a little iffy about spiders (interested but cautious), but when I was oh, 8? or so, one unexpectedly scurried up my bare leg. Upset the crap out of me. That put some fear into me for years to come.

Our kids - heh, well it was my oldest son (now 11) who "bugged" me about getting a tarantula for years. He was way more keen on the idea than I was. lol Finally got our first last fall, and now I'm the extreme keener in the family.
He loves it, is interested and facinated, but has an edge of fear and respect that I think is healthy. Our daughter, who just turned 7, adores all living things it seems. (She once kissed a worm goodbye when she was 2, lolol.) She likes to watch our juvie T, but not get too close to it. However, since we got our little avic slings, she is always first in line for a closer look and even to (carefully) hold. She is now arguing about who will have more T's when we divide up our wee slings to family "ownership."
Our middle guy, 10, could take them or leave them. He always had a neutral attitude toward animals in our home. Will enjoy them to a certain level, but could live with or without them. The T's, he has no interest in and does not care to be near for a closer look. I perceive a bit of fear about it. He and hubby are very much alike.

We had family visiting at New Years, with two little girls aged 5 and 6. When invited for a closer look at the T's, one wanted nothing to do with it (like both their parents) and the other was very highly interested and relaxed about it.

Imo, I think it's partly inborn, and partly experiences. (With more emphasis on experiences.)

I think it's really helpful to have small slings to introduce to kids. When I brought our first to our son's school, the kids (11y/o) were able to come "visit" it (caged) a few at a time. I'd say at 80-90% of them approached feeling somewhere along the lines of afraid and/or grossed out. However, when they saw the little guy, and were told it was "just a baby," most of them relaxed with interst and many said, "Oh, it's so cute!"

I think it's imperative not to push them on anyone. It'll increase their fears and make the whole experience feel more negative. Let them go at their own pace, and in an enthusiastic and relaxed way answer any questions they might have.

 

[Cirith Ungol]

I find it quite interesting to read all this. Most of all your post Sandra. When you speak of people who go "ick" when they see an animal that looks a bit different than the usual, those are the times when I realize I seem to be able to relate to the animals (for ex. Ts) more than to most people.

I've always been and played arround spiders, insects, frogs, toads, everything small that moves basically... age four also threw the occasoinal ball at some cows right infront of me because they wanted to play with me... (I didn't hear my mother screaming in the background )

Loved to feed ants, spiders, catch all that hops and flies and never been bothered. Yes, I am a bit scared of being bit by a T, but who sane wouldn't be. It certainly hurts, so I hear. But I like them just as much as my cat that has also (and I agree with one of the previous speakers in that) scratched, clawed, bit me and done all the other things. And no my cat is very friendly, cosy, cuddly and luvy.

The reason for my tollerance is that I was always allowed to explore the emediate animal world on my own so I soon learned that most insects and spiders are nothing else than fascinating. So I think it's a good idea to let the children observe and learn and eventually take responsability.

 

[Immortal_sin]

I started out as horribly arachnophobic, and realized I was passing my fear of spiders to my daughter. I'd always known it was a rediculous fear, but never wanted to do anything about it till I realized that my child was becoming more and more afraid. So, between 1999 and 2000, I embarked on a mission lol.
In 2001, we purchased our first tarantula, and we've never looked back. Now, we do school demonstrations, and she helps me with them. The only thing she hates is the kids at school that call her 'spider girl'.

 

[bagheera]

Knowledge Conquers Fear

As a 6 year old, I brushed the leg of a large wolf spider. It reared up on me and terrified me. AFTER that I took to reading field guides and texts on all the life around me. Arachnids, Insects Herps and Mammals. I studied and learned. I lost my fears and gained respect where it was warranted. I was an unusual child! :evil:

 

[Kali]

my daughter loved our various exotic pets, until her friends told her they were gross.:wall: no matter how much you try to encourage a healthy interest, peer pressure will ultimatly play a role. good luck. i have had success bringing tarantulas, scorpions, and various other animals into her class for science day or show and tell. your involvement will definitly help!

 

[BlkCat]

My daughter is 8. She loves the spiders. She wont touch them, though. She was also scared of snakes for a long time. When we began keeping snakes, she wanted one of her own. She eventually got to the point where she would touch snakes. It just takes patience.

 

[BlkCat]

my daughter loved our various exotic pets, until her friends told her they were gross.:wall: no matter how much you try to encourage a healthy interest, peer pressure will ultimatly play a role. good luck. i have had success bringing tarantulas, scorpions, and various other animals into her class for science day or show and tell. your involvement will definitly help!

Whenever my daughter has friends over, I show them the spiders. I tell them about the Ts. I show them pics of all the pretty Ts on the internet. It seems to make the kids interested in them. It seems to put a smile on thier face. I have learned that the young girls are way more interested in the pretty Ts and the boys are interested in the big Ts.
I guess when my A. geniculta grows up, I will be ready for both.

 

[Heartfang]

I have been interested in creepy-crawlies all my life. I used to call them "gubs" in my earlier years. I'd take my little flashlight and go "gub hunting" whenever I went to spend the night at my grandma's house. Now, I'm 17 and love 'em more than ever!