- Joined
- Aug 8, 2005
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- 11,048
The upstairs porch connects to the front porch roof. In turn, this gives the cats access to all four windows in my office. The cats, for reasons best known to themselves, must go out onto the upstairs porch at least 101 times a day. So any time one goes through the upstairs hall one will find a cat wanting out on the porch.
It's the tropics. Leave windows open or it's life in a sauna. This gives the cats three window ledges to jump onto to inform me they absolutely must come back in.
Cat 1, Sea Cow (see=all, cow=white) attention summoning: meeeeewp. meeeeewp. Repeated ~10 times a minute ceaselessly - forever.
Cat 2, Momem (gnarly, grubby, disheveled): BWAAAAAAAAAA!!! Think bagpipes. The paint starts to flake and peel off the walls. The sound penetrates into every room in the house, frightens away the birds on the roof of the house next door and makes the squirrels in the tree above the house nervous.
Cat 3, Snit the klutz (as in Oh .... SNIT! There's a kitten stuck on top of the fuel tank in my truck). Leaps at window sill, flails about, scrambles, falls off. Tries again... and again.... and again. Finally a pair of paws appear as it clings for dear life to the sill, painfully pulls itself up and at last, stable. MWEEeeeep. Tries scratching itself or turning around, flails, scrambles, falls off. Repeat.
In self defense I go to the porch door and let them back in. Routine repeats ~15 to 50 times a day.
So I bought a cat door. Swings both ways nothing special cat door. Except the genius designers decided the door itself should be made of plexiglass.
All three cats prove to be completely incapable of going through the door unassisted. Shove them through, hurl them through, drag them through from the other side, and they just don't get the clue. Prop the door open and fine, in and out, no problem.
It took me an entire week to figure out what the screw up was. Can you guess it?
It's the tropics. Leave windows open or it's life in a sauna. This gives the cats three window ledges to jump onto to inform me they absolutely must come back in.
Cat 1, Sea Cow (see=all, cow=white) attention summoning: meeeeewp. meeeeewp. Repeated ~10 times a minute ceaselessly - forever.
Cat 2, Momem (gnarly, grubby, disheveled): BWAAAAAAAAAA!!! Think bagpipes. The paint starts to flake and peel off the walls. The sound penetrates into every room in the house, frightens away the birds on the roof of the house next door and makes the squirrels in the tree above the house nervous.
Cat 3, Snit the klutz (as in Oh .... SNIT! There's a kitten stuck on top of the fuel tank in my truck). Leaps at window sill, flails about, scrambles, falls off. Tries again... and again.... and again. Finally a pair of paws appear as it clings for dear life to the sill, painfully pulls itself up and at last, stable. MWEEeeeep. Tries scratching itself or turning around, flails, scrambles, falls off. Repeat.
In self defense I go to the porch door and let them back in. Routine repeats ~15 to 50 times a day.
So I bought a cat door. Swings both ways nothing special cat door. Except the genius designers decided the door itself should be made of plexiglass.
All three cats prove to be completely incapable of going through the door unassisted. Shove them through, hurl them through, drag them through from the other side, and they just don't get the clue. Prop the door open and fine, in and out, no problem.
It took me an entire week to figure out what the screw up was. Can you guess it?
The door looks like glass. Being slightly smarter than me, through trial and error, face and head flattening numerous times, they know glass is impenetrable. If only I could get my mitts around the throat of whoever designed that door...
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