At what point do you turn the tables?

[Katiekooleyes]

This is a convo that is the whole "kill it with fire" scenario.

We've all been there, and heard the whole shtick. The whole "kill it with fire" etc.

Well, long story short, I found myself not only in a "discussion", but a dilema towards myself also. A group im involved in made a post about posting pets.

"Cute" pets were posted, etc. So, I added my sling Avic sp. Got the response of "I don't like spiders!" ok, no probs. "shes" chill as hell. A GIf of a flamethrower team occurs.So, I posted a pic of a cat (this was a cat person) with burns. I pointed out that if they don't like that pic about their pets, then why should I have to put up with their maliciousness!?

Am I being a twat? Or do I have a point to some degree?

 

[Arachnophoric]

This is a convo that is the whole "kill it with fire" scenario.

We've all been there, and heard the whole shtick. The whole "kill it with fire" etc.

Well, long story short, I found myself not only in a "discussion", but a dilema towards myself also. A group im involved in made a post about posting pets.

"Cute" pets were posted, etc. So, I added my sling Avic sp. Got the response of "I don't like spiders!" ok, no probs. "shes" chill as hell. A GIf of a flamethrower team occurs.So, I posted a pic of a cat (this was a cat person) with burns. I pointed out that if they don't like that pic about their pets, then why should I have to put up with their maliciousness!?

Am I being a twat? Or do I have a point to some degree?

You absolutely have a point. Regardless of weather or not it's cute, that's your pet they're making jokes about harming. If they feel upset seeing the picture of that cat, maybe they'll realize how you feel when people yell "kill it with fire!"

 

[The Seraph]

This is a convo that is the whole "kill it with fire" scenario.

We've all been there, and heard the whole shtick. The whole "kill it with fire" etc.

Well, long story short, I found myself not only in a "discussion", but a dilema towards myself also. A group im involved in made a post about posting pets.

"Cute" pets were posted, etc. So, I added my sling Avic sp. Got the response of "I don't like spiders!" ok, no probs. "shes" chill as hell. A GIf of a flamethrower team occurs.So, I posted a pic of a cat (this was a cat person) with burns. I pointed out that if they don't like that pic about their pets, then why should I have to put up with their maliciousness!?

Am I being a twat? Or do I have a point to some degree?

I would say you are right to argue for yourself. These are our pets and they are beautiful and fascinating creatures, not loathed abominations to be exterminated with fire. For people to act in such a manner is rude and inconsiderate. Posting a picture of a burned cat is a bit gruesome though.

 

[Katiekooleyes]

I would say you are right to argue for yourself. These are our pets and they are beautiful and fascinating creatures, not loathed abominations to be exterminated with fire. For people to act in such a manner is rude and inconsiderate. Posting a picture of a burned cat is a bit gruesome though.

Of course, the burned cat pic was horrid, and it certainly wasn't pleasant "picking one out". However, that person was more than ok posting a pic of flamethrowers. The way i see it, what's good for the goose, is good for the gander.

It actually brings me to a point a week or so. A wok friend of mine mentioned about stepping on my T's for a laugh. So in reply(him being a dog lover), I suggested how about we go puppy stamping for a giggle. "apparently", that's a step too far (no pun intended)

 

[Garth Vader]

Yes, stand up for your animals. The cat might be a but much, depending on your goals.

I think liking spiders and keeping them as pets is seen as "weird" and people will have strong opinions. You won't change it, but you could give some cool info about them or just ask people to be more thoughtful before they post about setting your beloved pet on fire. I have found that even people who are initially disgusted end up being quite curious. I have even had a few friends ask if they can meet my spiders to help with their fears.

I would be afraid that the burning cat picture will turn people off and shut their minds.

Also, I'm sorry people said that about your floofy avic. That sucks.

 

[Uial]

I'd say you were within your right to answer the way you did. Though honestly, these people are just rude, and hopefully this will make them think.

I was very arachnophobic before I decided that it was affecting my live in a way that was too unhealthy to continue like this. I screamed whenever I saw a spider and left the room immediately. Honestly, I left the house and went to use my friend's bathroom, when there was a spider in my own.

They terrified me so much that I sat in a corner crying for a few hours after seeing one walking by my bed. At one point I asked my bf to kill them instead of catching them in a cup and getting them outside. (He never did, for which I'm grateful today)

But even then I would have never suggested killing someone's pet spider to their faces. It's a pet, one has an emotional connection to it. I also wouldn't suggest to make bacon out of one of those pet piggies. That's just being a decent human.

 

[MikeyD]

Sometimes I think people just want a reason to use some of their tired old jokes. The entire “kill it with fire” or “time to burn down the house” jokes are just old and past their prime. You could turn the tables or just remind them that they aren’t actally funny or clever.

 

[Teal]

I have two responses in those situations... Response #1 - "I know you were just joking, but please consider my feelings on this matter when I say that I love my pets just like you love yours and jokes about harming them are not appreciated." If the person responds back apologetically, then all is well and maybe I have helped expand their ability to respect differing views/opinions. But, if they reply rudely, then I escalate with Response #2 which is similar to what you did - filling in the blank of those harmdul catchphrases with their chosen companion species. People don't appreciate when you talk about stomping their puppy to death, so I save that to really get the attention of people who don't take my first response seriously.

 

[AmbushArachnids]

I personally would let this stuff run right off my back. By reacting you are showing that your emotionally effected and that's what they are wanting. To see your emotional reaction. Why give them the satisfaction? In that moment remember you are an ambassador for tarantula keepers and the hobby. Remember you are one of the few people on planet earth that isn't scared or threatened by an arachnid and that makes you abnormal in a simps eyes. You're in total control of the situation and how you react. You cannot control other people by force but by showing you are in control of yourself. Embrace it. Tarantulas are badass anyway. Burn one.. no big deal, for everyone you see there are millions feeding in the background as we speak, brooding the next generation in a silk orb of glowing life. There's my 2 cents short of a grain of salt. Enjoy.

 

[The Grym Reaper]

I find they quickly shut up once you retort with something about setting their dog/cat/kids on fire.

Or I just post this in reply.

 

[CJJon]

Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. (G. Carlin)

 

[boina]

I completely understand why you reacted the way you did, and I might, too, in the heat of the moment but generally I wouldn't do it, because it doesn't help. For me the main question is: what do you want to achieve? If you just want to vent, then go for it and I think nobody can blame you. But in some cases you may just get some understanding by reacting how @Teal suggested, for example. I haven't been in the situation often, but when I was I managed to just laugh it off and felt better for it.

Many people just need to run off their mouth, anyway. The worst offender I know is my neighbor - and we are good friends actually. He hates spiders, though, and needs to make it clear that he would kill them if they ever got out. He doesn't though. When one of my spiders actually got out and disappeared behind a huge book shelf he was the one who helped me dismantle the shelf and he even handed me the catch cup in the end... what I want to say is, in some cases it's just talk and it may be more effective to react with reason instead with emotion, even if it's hard.

 

[StampFan]

This is a convo that is the whole "kill it with fire" scenario.

We've all been there, and heard the whole shtick. The whole "kill it with fire" etc.

Well, long story short, I found myself not only in a "discussion", but a dilema towards myself also. A group im involved in made a post about posting pets.

"Cute" pets were posted, etc. So, I added my sling Avic sp. Got the response of "I don't like spiders!" ok, no probs. "shes" chill as hell. A GIf of a flamethrower team occurs.So, I posted a pic of a cat (this was a cat person) with burns. I pointed out that if they don't like that pic about their pets, then why should I have to put up with their maliciousness!?

Am I being a twat? Or do I have a point to some degree?

1) The internet is typically stupid, ignorant and faceless
2) Who cares
3) Its the other person's problem if they don't like spiders, not yours.
4) Never get hung up by what some idiot on a discussion board says (myself and this thread included).
5) Other people will never understand this hobby. You can try to educate, but don't beat yourself up over it.

 

[matypants]

You could have responded in a far harsher manner. If they can dish it but not take it the problem is theirs. Personally I love the response. Lol

 

[basin79]

This is a convo that is the whole "kill it with fire" scenario.

We've all been there, and heard the whole shtick. The whole "kill it with fire" etc.

Well, long story short, I found myself not only in a "discussion", but a dilema towards myself also. A group im involved in made a post about posting pets.

"Cute" pets were posted, etc. So, I added my sling Avic sp. Got the response of "I don't like spiders!" ok, no probs. "shes" chill as hell. A GIf of a flamethrower team occurs.So, I posted a pic of a cat (this was a cat person) with burns. I pointed out that if they don't like that pic about their pets, then why should I have to put up with their maliciousness!?

Am I being a twat? Or do I have a point to some degree?

100% have a point. Many seem fine posting "I'd stamp on it" or "kill it with fire" when typing about tarantulas, spiders, centipedes but get massively offended if anything is typed about something they love.

They're so dumb they can't see they're the same thing.

 

[StampFan]

100% have a point. Many seem fine posting "I'd stamp on it" or "kill it with fire" when typing about tarantulas, spiders, centipedes but get massively offended if anything is typed about something they love.

They're so dumb they can't see they're the same thing.

And if they don't believe this, let them watch Basin's YouTube vids when he lovely calls his 'pedes sweetheart. I love that.

 

[FrDoc]

I completely understand why you reacted the way you did, and I might, too, in the heat of the moment but generally I wouldn't do it, because it doesn't help. For me the main question is: what do you want to achieve? If you just want to vent, then go for it and I think nobody can blame you. But in some cases you may just get some understanding by reacting how @Teal suggested, for example. I haven't been in the situation often, but when I was I managed to just laugh it off and felt better for it.

Many people just need to run off their mouth, anyway. The worst offender I know is my neighbor - and we are good friends actually. He hates spiders, though, and needs to make it clear that he would kill them if they ever got out. He doesn't though. When one of my spiders actually got out and disappeared behind a huge book shelf he was the one who helped me dismantle the shelf and he even handed me the catch cup in the end... what I want to say is, in some cases it's just talk and it may be more effective to react with reason instead with emotion, even if it's hard.

"...in the heat of the moment..."? Pun intended?

 

[SteveIDDQD]

I don't think you where our of line, but for me personally it's not worth arguing, I will maybe have a discussion if it comes up in real life, but online it's just not worth it. I have no desire to educate strangers on anything unless they have a genuine interest.

 

[Bailz]

I've had the 'kill it with fire' people see sense, when I explain that by all means do that...then deal with swarms of flies all over your food the minute it's uncovered.

Depending on the poster, i just give them the facts or 'out meme' them.

(Poignant topic tbh, as i post up 'educational' snippets about my spiders on my personal Facebook. I tend to write in such a neutral tone specifically in these instances, that even the 'trolliest' FB friends i have show some interest).

 

[Chris LXXIX]

Well, long story short, I found myself not only in a "discussion", but a dilema towards myself also. A group im involved in made a post about posting pets.

I love you but please it's 'dilemma' (with two 'M') and not 'dilema'. A bit of respect for our Italian language that the English/American people keep to culturally 'grab'